Buying a little piece of Middle England; Manifesting my way to mortgage free.

debtfreewannabe321

Hi @Queen_of_the_Hive thanks for popping by, I don't watch EastEnders any more? What's on it at the moment?
I haven't watched any A Tate but my DD told me he was watching it and that's where he was getting his ideas from. I did sit him down and talk to him about it but I don't think much went in. I gathered he's a bit of a chauvinist but don't know much else. I do think that listening to him was a turning point and DS seems to have switched off at anything I say to him since then. 

daisy_1571

Bit of a chauvinist?   Like the empire state building is a bit of a tall building 

Dxx

debtfreewannabe321

daisy_1571 said:

Bit of a chauvinist?   Like the empire state building is a bit of a tall building 

Dxx

Perhaps I should look him up...not that it makes any difference now ☹️...

KajiKita

debtfreewannabe321 said:

daisy_1571 said:

Bit of a chauvinist?   Like the empire state building is a bit of a tall building 

Dxx

Perhaps I should look him up...not that it makes any difference now ☹️...

I think there are counter narratives out there where famous sportsmen are talking about tackling the AT influence on boys and young men. That might give you some ideas. 

AT is toxic tbh, truly horrid. 

TBH I’m surprised if his ‘step-mum’ is tolerating those attitudes from him (or even your ex towards his new flame), so perhaps he isn’t doing that there and his behaviour and attitudes might undergo something of a re-set? It will depend on what his friends and dad (your ex) are like though. 

KK

daisy_1571

Yeah, I wouldn't look him up, I've stumbled across a couple of his 'messages' and felt sickened 

Dxx

Bargainhunter30

Also don't give him the views as he gets paid for that. He's meant to be extremely against women and there were rape charges brought I think.

I wonder if Ex's new girlfriend is in just as an abusive situation as you were. They always present well in the beginning don't they. You know what it's like, so DD should not be jealous of their 'family', just glad she's seen him for what he is and is away from it now.

debtfreewannabe321

Morning all, 
I'm hoping DS grows out of it and realises he's not a good influence but I don't hold much hope. 
He's not responded to any messages for weeks now. I have sent maybe one a week 🙂 last one was just wishing him well when he starts his new school. 
I have to work really hard not to fall into the mindset of ' what did I do wrong ' I also have the same narrative going round about my mother and sister too. Sigh....tough life lessons these are when feeling abandoned and ignored by all family.

Moving on anyway, and out of that mindset, today we are moving some furniture back in from the garage. This is quite exciting as we have a bit of an empty room at the moment and it will be nice to start making it feel like our home again. Today's job is to move the huge side board we have which weighs a tonne 😐. It houses all our records, stationery, candles and batteries and a few other things so it will be nice not to have to traipse out to the spider house (garage) every time I need something. And DP is looking forward to the record player being back in place and usable. It also means we will have more space in the garage which we're a bit short on at the moment. It's looking like a hoarders paradise out there with furniture, tools and paint everywhere. At least the food has been moved now 🤣. 

Yesterday we got a shelf up, just a freestanding one under the very high up small cupboards with glass. I've put some jars that had no home and some other bits on there. When I find my recipe books they will also go on there but they have been temporarily mislaid 🤔.

I picked up my jumper and top from m&s. Both fit, one is a probably a bit booby for work but I like it. I've tried to seasonal colour match myself and so every time I'm buying clothes I'm trying to make sure it is in the season I put myself. It should also help to make my wardrobe pretty flexible and I'm hoping I can mix and match things to make different outfits. That's the plan anyway. Oh I downloaded the sparks card too my cousin told me they often do offers on there. I had 10% off fashion that's why I ordered those bits from there rather than somewhere cheaper. 

Yesterday we ordered the new TV we needed, the other one is broke. We went to Currys but I didn't buy from there as I felt it was expensive. I used TCB and got some cashback and found it £45 cheaper anyway so saved over £55 overall and split it into a pay in three payment. We went mid price I think and also mid size. I was pretty shocked at the size of some of the TVs in the shop 😳 some were taller than me and looked to be about 8-10ft wide as well 😳 these people buying them must have mansions or put the TV on the wall like it is a feature 🤔😳. 

Right best get on as I also want to go into town. I am thinking of buying some low heeled shoes for work. I've been in trainers (smartish black ones) since my last job and I wonder if they are some of the cause of my feet/ knee problems because they're so flat. I used to always wear heels during a work day and my legs never hurt as much as they do this last year or so..so my mission is to find something comfortable and with a low heel to trial. I'm determined to get myself fit and healthy again and that means fixing this damned leg pain and being able to walk properly. - as a side note the swimming is really helping. I feel like my fitness levels have already gone from a 1 to a 2/3 after only a couple of weeks regular swimming. I'm not planning on going for the next few days though as I dyed my hair ready for work (going SO grey) and I'm scared I missed some when washing it out and don't want to make the pool black 🤔🤣🤣.

ladybird1106

My leg/knee pain is due to a fallen arch, found wearing an arch support in my shoes has helped a hellva lot.
Getting old sucks, hope you find something practical but pretty whilst out shoe shopping,
love 🐞

KajiKita

You’ve evolved past your family. That’s why they feel uncomfortable around you. They think you are judging them - you’re not, you just have a very different perspective on life to the one you shared when you grew up with them. It’s very familiar …

Maybe swopping footwear types week to week or day to day would work your legs in different ways? I’ll be interested to hear how you get on with this 😊

Yaay for starting to reassemble the house! 😊👏🥳🎉🎊
I assume you’ll take everything out of the sideboard first before moving it? 😳💪

KK

daisy_1571

Kk has made a good point.  Its not that they left you behind,  you've evolved and sadly left them behind.  I was going yo suggest a similar point to bargainhunter, there's probably photos of the original 4 of you looking all happy families but she's old enough now to know that wasnt the reality at the time.  I'm not saying you have to disabuse her of all her childhood memories but it might becworyh a discussion saying look at this picture, what does it make you think?  Then telling her a bit of what was really going on.  Seems such a shame she's hankering after exidiot attention when she has a much better role model in her life every day who is interested in sharing her life, achievements and successes.

I've also wondered about the new partners he has had since you both split.  Bit if a shame for them till they cotton on to what he's like.

Have I ever recommended The Other Mrs Jordan book to you?  Fascinating book and I think should be compulsory reading for all women and probably some men too.  Anyone raised in a decent household simply has no idea there is people like that out there so it would help protect some women from bad relationships. 

Enjoy your putting away in new rooms 

Dxx