Watty's Awakening

Cherryfudge

He could be there for years - but on the other hand, things can change and he may not be. Interesting that he's contacted the solicitors, obviously grasping at anything now that you are free of him and asserting your true self and your abilities.

You are such a resourceful person, even if plans for the land don't work out as you intend, you will find ways forward. Plans for the land are to some degree necessarily affected by the past, but there may be other ways of looking at the situation that weren't obvious before, and new ways forward. Renting it out as mentioned seems like a good one to investigate if you can't go with plan A, though.

daisy_1571

Slinky said:

How long is the overage in place for?

Another 6 years

daisy_1571

I could definitely see him grabbing on with both hands if there's a sniff he thinks you want something.   Some folks are like that through and through and no amount of common sense will fix that, couldn't care less haven't given it a thought for years oooh you want it ?  Nows my chance to be awkward about this. 


I don't think you can ever blame yourself for getting involved.   For many years he was fine, for more recent years he appears to have undergone a bit of a personality change.  Who knows why that happens, internal chemistry changing as people grow older changing mindset,  the passage of years beginning to make them bitter about everything being 'better for everyone else', a realisation that they are a horrible person and their partner is smarter, more astute, friendlier, more well liked etc making them bitter and try to control that.  Who knows, maybe a mixture of all those.  Main thing is that a nice person expects everyone else to be nice and be treating them fairly.  


Thinking separate, sell and rent are looking like possible options.   Then just sit it out for another few years.

(Meantime who knows what may happen, evil twirl of moustache, swirl of cloak and hollow laugh whilst directing an evil eye towards pph.) 

Dxxxx

Humdinger1

An insensitive, even horrible question- didn't you mention that he has serious health issues @Watty1? Could that change things.  Please don't blame yourself, monsters tend to cover up who they are till they suddenly don't.   Love Humdinger xx 

beanielou

Just cheerleading. No advice. 

I also consider myself to be reasonably intelligent but failed to put a claim on ex DH’s pension for reasons that seemed valid at the time. How I regret it now. 

PennysIntoPounds

Nothing's a mess, you just have the 'privilege' of having options and needing to make decisions. If you decide you can't be a*sed and just stay there and do nothing for six years until you can raise a massive glass of bubbly to having effed him over, that is also fine (and to my mind rather attractive 😁). You'll be grand whatever you decide 🥂

badmemory

There is not much you can do with an ex who undergoes a complete character change.  Mine was a good husband & father for 12 years until his mother died.  It was like someone pressed a switch & he went from being the nice person his mother was to being the very not so nice person his father was.  When it happens they don't seem to have a way back.

dawnybabes

daisy_1571 said:

dawnybabes was that the bandage that clings to itself?   We had rolls of that too, really useful stuff.

Dxx

Yes it was, bought a job lot off the big river site 

dawnybabes

He really is the gift that keeps on giving isn’t he ! 

Watty1

dawnybabes said:

He really is the gift that keeps on giving isn’t he ! 

This comment made me burst out laughing. Thank you.