Moving on

ladybird1106

Sounds like you’ve had a lovely time with family.
love 🐞

Cherryfudge

Sleep schedule has officially fallen to pieces: I think that's been building for a couple of months after unprecedentedly behaving itself over the summer. Part of that could be the unusual amount of time I spent out of doors in the summer: natural daylight helps regulate sleep. Other than that, I know I stay awake if there are things looming that I don't want to do or that will take significant deviation from the norm, and from September onwards we've had a few things which, however enjoyable in themselves, have been in one or both of these categories. The result has been a slide into being up till stupid o'clock. Last night I slept an hour or so in the evening and woke up about 11 when DH came to bed. I was then up till 3 and awake till half past. I woke again when DH went to work but dozed off till half past 10. I now feel refreshed but hope not to repeat the pattern.

Of course, this means I haven't done much with the morning though I made myself a version of Watty1's soup with curry spices, adding more carrots and broccoli to use them up. This has lead to some fridge tidying.

The plan for this week
Today 10th - work
11th Tuesday - DH's day off. Child care. Evening - course.
12th Wednesday - afternoon church training refresher, evening lifegroup
13th Thursday - work. DH's day off.
14th Friday - work
15th Saturday ?
16th Sunday ?

Cherryfudge

Some useful bits and pieces have been started. One drawer of the freezer was emptied and cleaned and everything hurled back in, and I started a financial sort out going back years. It won't be a quick thing to do but I want to reassess my position. For this I needed a file of old bank statements and it was where I thought it probably was, but to get to it I had to sort out various books and folders and put them in their proper places. Hence a feeling of increased order, though little progress on the original project.

I even got to work on time: the first of the days of going in while it's dark. If I've worked it out rightly, there are 90 days - about a quarter of the year - of this and after that it will be well on the way to spring and longer evenings.

It was raining so DH picked me up form work (only 2.5 hours today) and we went home via the supermarket, though dinner was salmon from the freezer. We decided to try to eat from the freezer this week. I had a coupon for free veg from Lidl which I've used, but I've also finished up/composted some old veg.

This evening I'm in a tizzy as I'm supposed to have a life statement for the course tomorrow and am entirely failing to find one. I've had an issue with it since it was first mentioned, at which point it seemed very limiting and prescriptive. Now it feels triggering as some of the things that matter to me have lost the focus they used to have when I worked in a sector where I provided care for people. I don't think 'Nowadays I just bumble along' counts as a life statement, so I'm considering emailing the course tutor to tell him I can go to the session but haven't anything to offer. I've signed up for the church's version of the course I did on Saturday, as I want to hear what my team is being taught! I don't doubt its veracity but I want to be able to refer to it if needed.

Expenditure:
Housekeeping £13.44

Watty1

I had to write a life statement/mission statement as part of a coaching course I did some years ago. I had support to do it and I still have it on my desk.     Mine was written at a time when I was very isolated and depressed (and living with PPH) and I was wondering if it might help if I shared some of it?  To maybe give you some ideas.

It included lines like "my focus is on today, I take a deep breath and I trust in a positive future. I believe in my ability to survive and prosper with whatever life brings".   Thinking about how life turned out in the years after coming up with that it turned out to be very true.  

There are other lines like "I allow all parts of me to shine" and I had to think about the next state of my life whatever that would be (she did not know a few years later I would leave PPH).

I think you have a huge amount to offer, you are kind, considerate, chatty, a great friend, supportive,  important to your family, encouraging to others - your life statement can easily cover all of that.   (I know all this from your sharing on here btw).  

Sun_Addict

Ugh I hate having to do anything like that but that's a brilliant suggestion from Watty. At work my line manager asked me to think about my goals for the coming year and my honest answer was I don't have any as I'm on the countdown to retirement, I just want to continue doing my job well until that time. 

liselle

And never discredit your brilliant organisational skills, Cherry.

Cherryfudge

Thank you so much @Watty1, @Sun_Addict and @liselle, those thoughts are all much appreciated and I've been able to add to my notes. Still no actual life statement but it turned out at the group tonight that nobody had one! Or if they did, none were read out. People had tackled it in various ways including a lady I've known for years who had just drawn a line through the bits she didn't like, and presented her explanation as mind maps. I think even I felt we had all gained from it as an evaluation of our present status, rather than a series of future goals (after all, no one knows what may happen in future).

The day has been rainy. DH took the children to the toddler group and DD came over with her DD for an hour or so. She's so tired as the baby has woken hourly through the night and is always on the go when awake. The little one is only seven months, explores everywhere and can stand if she has something to hold onto, but of course has no awareness of danger. DD is resorting to taking her out all the time to keep her occupied.

We did crafts with the girls once DD and the baby had gone: cutting out snowflakes and paper chain dolls never grows old, and the younger one has developed an interest in colouring. They also had some magnetic blocks which the older one builds into meaningful scenes while the younger one made a big rectangle, repeating each time she added a block ' 'At goes dere'. There were also new books from the birthday so we did some stories, and I finished the baby blanket (N managed to talk me into giving her some glittery star buttons that I'd used as highlights) (well sown on and the children are old enough to be safe).

I was gloomy at the start of the day and did a bit of dopamine buying - so I am now better off to the tune of a pair of sandals, a doll, some makeup remover and a packet of biscuits. If you'd like an explanation, I'd been hankering after the sandals on Vinted and got a £5 reduction. The doll was a UK version of the American Girl dolls at a really good price as it has a small mark. The children will be allowed to play with her! The makeup remover was on the list to buy and I shared (some of) the biscuits.

Dinner was an omelette so I was hungry later and finished off some kefir with granola. I've also discovered cheap cappuccino sachets in Beeand Em which I think are really nice and could save me a bit on my cappuccino habit (still down to one a day but even that adds up and isn't doing my cholesterol any good as it's got palm oil).

Expenditure:
Hobby £4.31
Clothing £18.94
Toiletries £2.49
Housekeeping £13.52.

weenancyinAmerica

My philosophy teacher told us the first day of class that the final would be to write your own philosophy of life. After studying the great philosophers, he gave little tests along the way. The last day of class, he told us to take out our blue books and write our philosophy of life and then come out and join him for coffee or tea. I wrote three lines, then went out to join him. The next person came out an hour later. He went and collected the blue books of the rest of the class that were still writing two hours later. He then told us that we could have written something like "I just want to have the most fun in life". He would have accepted that. But it turns out most of the class just summarized what the other philosophers had said and didn't include their own philosophy. He only passed the two of us. The rest flunked and had to retake the class - and pay the tuition for class too. It was a required class at my university. I just want to get through each year somewhat successfully (without killing my roommates!).

Watty1

I love that weenancy!   It was indeed a life philosophy for the time.  I have an online course I'm trying to get to. It requires me to think about my values.  The first time I did this course I was with the ex and my values were such a disconnect, I realise now because they were not shared and were actively at odds with his and so did not get expressed.  I'm looking forward to it.

Cherryfudge

That all goes to show the value of actively listening to the instructions, @weenancyinAmerica!

@Watty1, I'm finding there is value in having a good think about what matters to me - not just what ought to matter to me, or theoretically matters. Time on my own suddenly comes high on the list, nicely balanced with time spent with others. So I'm seeing that holding things in balance is important, and as always, there's the trick... Identifying your values and comparing them to those of PPH will be a useful step forward for you. I hope you get a lot out of the course!

This afternoon I have the church Safeguarding course - not compulsory as I have just done an acceptable equivalent, but it will help me if I know the angle taken. A friend told me yesterday that she'd just done it (as a former Safeguarding lead herself) and thought well of it. In the evening I have my church group. With the rest of the time I need to email my course mentor and do some housework. I've just set the dishwasher off on a self-cleaning programme but that's just the tip of to do list.

It's currently dry outside so some laundry will be done. Last night there was a phenomenal aurora alert at about 3am (I usually get excited if the readings get to about 200, last night's was over 1500) - but I was fast asleep and it was cloudy. I'm still hoping to see the aurora 'for real', not just through a camera.