Am I unlucky or am I the problem

housebuyer143

It's partly a you I imagine but it's also unlucky with the houses you have bought and the neighbors you have had.
I am very noise sensitive and anything like you explained would drive me loopy very quickly. I know this so I would never live in a flat. I used to live in a semi which had excellent sound proofing but I was so worried about noise when I moved this time that I had to buy a detached.
I have a friend who has lived in a few terraces who could hear every word the neighbours said and she could hear them talking about her. And my sister lived in a flat next to partiers and it made her ill.

It's not ideal but noise cancelling headphones are a god send and ear plugs at night, but honestly I would be moving because you can't live anxious about the noise all the time. 

Bigphil1474

OP, you can try the friendly neighbour approach, but if you want to take it further, your local council can also help. Noise nuisance is an offence, so ultimately you can go down that route. Wouldn't advise it if you are thinking of selling up though. 

RelievedSheff

Having lived with noisy neighbours in the past you have my every sympathy. I know just how all consuming it can become and the negative effects it can have on your mental and physical health.

We were unfortunate and due to falling house prices we ended up in negative equity and unable to move from our noisy neighbours. 13 years we ended up stuck in that hell hole of a semi detached property.

Our solution was to move to a detached property as soon as we had enough equity again to do so. It wouldn't be everyone's choice a new build (now approaching 5 years old) detached house on a new estate but it is perfect for us. The nearest property is 6m away across a double driveway. We get zero neighbour noise, it is fantastic.

mark_cycling00

The "is it you" part of your question....

Have a think.
Did you enjoy the fact that these properties were very good value? Or a bit more property than you thought you could afford?

Do you find that your gut instinct isnt always that good in other aspects of life? 

Do you take risks a lot?

If no to these then maybe it's all bad luck and you'll get good luck very soon

ThisIsWeird

Hi Firearcade.

Everyone has different tolerance levels. However, I think your post comes across as measured and reasonable, so I suspect that you've had pretty bad luck with your homes.

I don't personally think the use of noise-cancelling headphones and the like are a way to live. So, for your current home, I guess it's a combination of a reasonable approach to the music-makers, and - depending on the outcome -  playing your own choice of music at whatever volume you require to drown out theirs, and/or buying a suitable musical instrument such as a trumpet or electronic drums to learn to 'play'. For the latter, if you time your beats to match their backing tracks, then...  

Ultimately - although not even this guarantees a quiet life - it looks as tho' you need to go 'detached'. And check out the 'hood carefully beforehand, at all times of the day and eve. This may mean a move to a less desirable location, but your actual home has to be a welcoming and relaxing place to come back to and be in, regardless of where it is.

EssexHebridean

Terraced housing as such isn't the issue - poorly built terraced housing is though. We live in a late 1950's terrace - and while we do hear some noise through from next door via windows, we hear nothing at all through the walls! When we were in our flat - reinforced concrete sectional construction from 1956 - again, no noise whatsoever through the walls, but when the upstairs people decided to lay laminate flooring throughout that was a different story! 

I would also agree that the way the neighbours introduced themselves suggests that they were expecting they might already have been mentioned to the OP...

Dustyevsky

Sadly, the sort of introduction the 'music people' gave themselves couldn't be predicted and the vast majority of us would have had difficulty knowing how to respond.

With hindsight, I suppose the best answer would have been, “Oh, we're the argumentative, shouty, swearing couple, who have rows with neighbours and do vindictive things in the middle of the night, but we're trying to reform and promise not to start anything if people leave us in peace!”

RHemmings

I'm in the group of people not so bothered by noise, which helps given my partner's volcanic snoring. Because of this, I too was biased towards a detached house. Not because of avoiding noise from others, but to avoid my noise annoying others. 

For the OP, I think this is the kind of thing that will happen if you're financially limited to the lower end of the market. Is this the case for you? I'm sure you'd have less problems with noise in expensive areas. Unless you end up next door to an incredibly rich opera fan, who organises live performances at their house like in a TV episode I saw. 

7firearcade

Thanks to everyone for the sympathy, solidarity and suggestions - both the serious and humorous. 

To answer the question about location: we are in a leafy and generally calmer part of south-east London, zone 2/3 borderlands. Detached housing here is rare and far too expensive for us unfortunately. We did seriously consider moving out of London but it wasn't possible for a variety of reasons so I think we will have to just put up with the noise for now. Your responses have made me realise that these issues are largely par for the course and our next step will be to get a soundproofing expert in and take stock again towards the end of 2024... 

RHemmings

7firearcade said:

Thanks to everyone for the sympathy, solidarity and suggestions - both the serious and humorous. 

To answer the question about location: we are in a leafy and generally calmer part of south-east London, zone 2/3 borderlands. Detached housing here is rare and far too expensive for us unfortunately. We did seriously consider moving out of London but it wasn't possible for a variety of reasons so I think we will have to just put up with the noise for now. Your responses have made me realise that these issues are largely par for the course and our next step will be to get a soundproofing expert in and take stock again towards the end of 2024... 

I once lived in Forest Hill many moons ago. In which case, I understand about the cost of detached housing having revisited on the weekend and looked up house prices out of curiosity. I don't remember a lot of noise then. I was in a converted flat on the top floor of one half of a semi.