Money Moral Dilemma: Can I keep some of the cash from selling my daughter's christening present?

keithyno.1

TELL your daughter how much it’s worth. THEN ask her does she want you to sell it on her behalf. If she does and decides to give you some of the money as a token of gratitude for the trouble you’ve gone to, then that’s all good. If she doesn’t then you’ll just have to accept that - it was given to and belongs to HER, not you.

Your question seems to imply to me that you’re thinking of going behind her back and not being honest, truthful and upfront with her. If that’s the case, then you do really need to analyse your own moral compass - it’s a poor parent who’d even think of ripping off their own kid, in my opinion. 

CapeTown

Good grief.  I would sooner chop off my own fingers than take money belonging to my daughter.  You need to take a good hard look at yourself in the mirror. 

SavvySlut

I haven’t seen one reply telling you to sell and keep the money yourself. That is because they are all right! There is no grey area here - it is not yours to sell. The end. 

Borage

I see your MSE Staff so obviously it must be a spoof post as nobody could be that greedy and selfish to their offspring

thedr

This is your daughter’s money, straight forward and simple. You’ve done the work of finding a buyer, it’s true. But in a way, that’s irrelevant.  You can’t keep the money made from someone else’s possession. It’s immoral. 

Of course if your daughter specifically said that could have the toy (rather than she doesn’t want it any more) then that is now your possession and yes, you could technically keep the money. But to be honest, you have a duty to tell your daughter its worth and to give her the money. 

However you dress it up, you can’t profit from a loved one like that and it might create huge rifts in the family in later life. It sounds to me that your daughter had no idea of the value and perhaps would have been more hesitant to give it away had she known. 

HampshireH

If its genuinely valuable and going to hold or increase its value then I would suggest to her you put it in a box/cupboard/ the loft, give it to her to take with her when she moves out/has a family or whatever and let her do with it as she pleases with it in the knowledge of its value (that may have increased). Make sure if its worth a lot its insured.

If that's not the case and it's going to decrease In value then if SHE decides to sell it then she is entitled to all the money. It is hers.

Personally I would love to have something special and valuable belonging to my little ones that could be enjoyed by them when they are older (either my passing on or by benefitting financially)

taurustime

I think that bringing your 'dilemma' to the MSE forum, perhaps seeking - or hoping for - endorsement of your secrecy around your daughter, displays your own unease in keeping this 'windfall' money. Whilst a lot depends on your relationship with your daughter, I'd think that keeping secrets about money gained from something 'she no longer wants' is very different from your misguided belief of her 'gifting' the item to you. In your position, I'd be looking forward to the joy on MY daughter's face at this unexpected cash gift from you that, in reality, other than a bit of petrol and a couple of coffees, cost you nothing.

john_evmk

It's a sad reflection on society that you even need to ask. It's your daughter's property, you should check that she is happy for you to sell it and then you should give her all of the money that you get for it.

Granniesue69

I entirely agree with the comments posted especially by ripongrammargirl.
I never post on forums but when I married, 55yrs ago, my mum got rid of all my books, collection of National dress dolls, and many other treasured stuff which I was going to collect when we had sorted our flat out. They went before I could collect.
I’ve since had four children, five grandchildren and six great grandchildren. Most of their baby toys, 70s toys etc were in our loft until we moved to a very small retirement flat five years ago and no longer had storage room. All of it was given back to them, some of the toys were worth quite a lot, they either kept them or sold or donated them, their choice, and I must add I didn’t charge for storage.

Cambsmum

Wow,
what sort of parent would even consider not given their child all of the money?