Simplifying Life

mary43

Back now and how lovely to read all your postings.
Thanks becky for the lovely poem
Thanks ceridwen for the link to that article...........sums a lot of things up for me.

Came back a day early from being away........had a lovely time with baby grandson who laughs and giggles no matter what...........not a worry, not a care..........what a blissful age to be. Called to see Mum - that didn't upset me as much as I thought it would despite her saying I was just in time for her funeral.............than going on to tell me about someone she knew who had died and the funeral was that day..........I knew it wasnt and it was just Mum getting confused, losing track of time etc. Gave her a massage of hands face and neck to leave her with the 'feel good factor'.................Mum hated things like that until she was ill.............now she enjoys it and it relaxes her a lot.

Had a good day out today in Kings Lynn shopping - no clutter bought at all and OH was very good in charity shops steering me away from the endless racks of jumpers that I know I don't need.................lol
I bought some card for cardmaking that was a bargain (I thought) some hand made card from the charity shop along with some pretty card embellishments. And a set of cardboard drawers I've let to assemble.........the idea being that I can keep all my card making stuff in them in a more orderly fashion that it is at the minute. I'll attempt that in the morning. It was only £2 from the charity shop and it worst comes to worst, well the cardbooard is nicely decorated to I'll be able to use it for some sort of craft thing.
OH treated himself to a couple of DVD's and some videos -had to let him as its his birthday next week..................lol
Weather today wasn't too bad............even sat outside having a coffee in Kings Lynn but as the day wore on it got worse and when we got back to the Travel Lodge it started to rain. Nearest place to eat was a pub nearly a mile away -lovely meal we had there last night - and as we were only an hour away from home it seemed the easiest option...............I'd paid for two nights but at least we saved having to pay out for a meal...........plenty in the freezer here. Nice to go away................even nicer to come home.

Greenshieldstamp_2

Dear Mary43

I am glad to hear you had a good day out with your OH having some time to yourselves. You are a very giving person and you deserve some time for you.

I know what you mean about coming home - sometimes coming home can seem like checking into somewhere away if you know what I mean.

Best wishes anyway

My simplifying trick that has worked for today is to not buy a new washing up bowl after the old one broke. Much easier to just have the sink to keep clean and am saving a few pennies by not having a new one.

do_it_today!

ceridwen wrote: »

A very one-off (or maybe 2 or 3 off) simplifying thought for a lifetime here.

Having spent yet another weekend doing work on my old house -

A thought for the younger MSE members who are still in the process of buying a house in the first place - dont buy a "dump" unless you have a lot of resources of time/money/patience/taste for a challenge. It sounds obvious - but, if all you have ever known is modern houses then (if you're anything like as naive as I was about old houses) you dont know what you could be letting yourself in for.

If you have come from modern houses then you will look at an old house and think "okay - new kitchen/swop the roof/doubleglaze/add few extra powerpoints/redecorate - job done". Dont just look at what you can readily see needs doing and ignore how good the house looks in your surveyors report - chances are you wont have the true picture.

Check the electrics for yourself - everywhere/fusebox/the lot to see for yourself the state they are in. Check the central heating/hot water heating system yourself. Check every single wall (knock on them to see if they sound hollow - that means the plaster has died). Check every single floor - they might well need replacing (forget ideas of ripping up the floor coverings and thinking you will find nice wood plank floors you can just sand underneath - you may well find chipboard patching/fireplace bases not taken out properly/etc). Check you can just put up your curtain rails above the windows in a standard sort of way.

If you do all that checking before buying an old house you will save yourself endless time/money/temper later discovering just how bad a state your house is in - and endlessly throwing yet more time and money at the house that you had planned on using for other things.

I am never going to finish my house now - most floors will be left as they are and most rooms wont be replastered - as you come to a point where you think "no - end of story - time to reclaim my life - its good enough".

So - voice of experience - buying the right house in the first place is one of the single biggest things you will do ever to simplify your life (you will keep your spare time and cash for yourself and not find yourself doing sideline moneyearning stuff to get some more money to throw at the house).

Hi All :hello:

its a difficult one and even more so these days with the astronomical house prices.... we were buying our 'forever' home 2006 and got gazumped just before exchange... although I still feel sore about it buying it really would not have simplified our life although cared for. It needed a new kitchen - bathroom complete paint job + all the hidden unknown extra's two years on factor in higher utility bills c tax rise food costs improving it everyweekend - it would have been stressful stretch... but at the time you can only work with the information you have... I still would like that house (or one similar) but I am also grateful for the warm cosy nurturing home we do have - and although I am still a serial househunter I cant find anything that at least matches what we have.... or one that would be worth saddling ourselves with 100-150k's more mortgage debt round our necks. Instead I think we will bide our time and make our home here abit more cosy instead! :j (more simplifying!!!)

Rowan9

Hi ppolly - your post made me laugh - wow - excellent choice of presents for you
mary43 - glad you enjoyed your time away and , as has been said, glad to come home again!
greenshield - no excuse not to have a shiny sink now! I haven't used a washing up bowl for years and love it when my sink is shiny (not often enough!)
groatie - I've been so inspired by your posts. I admire the way you are using your time so productively and allocating time to think about what you want and what is important. How freeing to clear out stuff! We have had such a clear out here - more bags to the charity shop yesterday, along with a lamp shade and a white kiddies' marker board that was in the loft. I have given away about a third of my clothes I think. It's just brilliant! I really can't recommend it enough. But.... I also understand that you need enough to wear and have some in your drawers. I totally cleaned out a drawer from my massive chest of drawers and relined it, this time with gold paper with Christmas robins on it. I sprayed it lightly with perfume I got from OH at Christmas and then I rolled my T shirts etc and put them in rows. I can see clearly what I have. I threw out pairs of pyjamas and 'ugly' things I wore in bed (oh lucky OH - he comes home today after a week away - but has a stinking cold). Why should we wear things we think are ugly? It's a bit like you say, groatiequeen, you can't find yourself until you've cleared out 'stuff'. I'm trying to use the 'Do I love it? Is it useful?' guide and most of the time this has 'given' me permission to chuck it!
Decorating of the hallway is complete! It is light and welcoming now. Maybe I've had to clear the passage into the house in order to let light and clear thinking into my life. Can't believe how much it has worked.

Hope everyone has a good day.
w

mary43

Hi all !

Well, I've assembled the cardboard set of drawers I bought for my craft paper (£2 -charity shop buy) - what a performance it was and still one drawer support isn't sitting quite right ! Think I'll have a go at a later and more saner moment................lol Then I had to walk around a bit working out where to put it At the minute its sitting on top of the filing cabinet but not sure I like it there.............blocks the pictures of the teenage grandchildren and I like to keep an eye on them..................lol

No simplifying today I have to confess................It's our third wedding anniversary and we've decided to spend it just 'loafing' about........well it's out day so why not ? Might.............just might.........get the paintbrush out later ad slosh a coat of paint on the cupboard thats lurking in the 'ex-junk' room (now called 'store room' - though its still tends to harbour junk) Not having kids around makes it easier to do things like that plus I want to actually 'use' it.
Weather forecast being so awful for later in the week will be a good excuse to stay in and catch up with ourselves a bit. Nice weather would lure us out and the temptation to 'spend' would be there I know it, and we've had out retail therapy for this week.
Still we'll see. Not making great plans for fear of them not happening..............just take each day as it comes and see what we feel like. Think I need to clear out my wardrobe once more or at least 'organise' it............stuff sort of gets slung in there, particular jumpers then I can never find whichever one I want and end up wearing the same one yet again !!
I go along with the 'do I love it ?' 'is it useful?' guide - least I'm trying to. I've got jumper I love but they dont fit any more but because I love the pattern on them I have it in my head to turn them into a cushion (seen it on the tele) but never get around to it -think OH might flip at yet more cushions.............lol
You all seem to be doing so well...............it really is an inspiration..........I just need to act on it.

Just found this quote:
Simplicity is making the journey of this life with just baggage enough.

ceridwen

Like the quote Mary - making the journey with just baggage enough. I often think that if I had to start getting my home together again (ie the "fire destroying everything" scenario - :shhh: - dont want to tempt fate!) then I would get a LOT less stuff than I have now - as I would just sit down logically and make out a list of what I needed/particularly wanted to replace and it would come to a fraction of what I still have left now.

I keep myself motivated to do some decluttering by thinking "if this room was totally empty - just how long would it take to springclean it - answer about 20-30 minutes" and I know that that room will take a lot longer because of the amount of stuff I actually have in it.

I'm not even going to go there in my reason/excuse? for keeping most of my (pretty extensive) collection of reference books (I'm too much of a "puritan" at heart in many ways to allow myself to buy fiction books:D . I do borrow them from the library though.)

mary43

I've got to get myself sorted out before June.............son and his girlfriend are visiting with baby grandson !!!!!!!!!!!! Lovely as it will be, my word I've got to have a thorough de-clutter and clean up ! They're not 'stuff' people, they like certain things but having a very small house they''re limited so try and create as much space as possible.........and with baby grandson at that stage by then when everything in our house is 'baby height for grabbing' something has to be done..........!!!
Still thats then............current problem is OH and his wretched DVD he treated himsellf to while we were away. He got all settled to watch it this afternoon and the dvd player said 'bad disc' - OH was all rared up to sort out HMV tomorrow then I tried it in the computer and it worked. So, he tried a few more dvd's that previously worked in our machine and same thing happened - all 'bad disc'. Techie Board on here reckon the laser could be broken or it could just need a clean -= well we've no cleaning disc either so OH did much muttering and carrying on. I tried to get him to look on the positive side............at least he won't have to trail 20 miles and pay car parking for new disc........we can pop into town to woolworths and get one.......even get a new dvd player if it'll make him happy (then I thought of the spagetti junction that goes on behind all these machines) !! Current machine is combination of video and dvd............want to keep the video so a new dvd would be an extra ! Oh well, lets hope it just needs a bit of a clean and cross fingers. At least its not an unsolvable problem - unlike those that many people have............but try telling that to OH when he's being a grumpy old man.........................lol
Having had an extremely lazy day today I will get stuck in tomorrow.......sort out OH and his dvd prob in the morning and hopefully, paint my little cupboard in the afternoon.........(she says !!)
Now off for further 'laze' in the form of slobbing on the sofa with some mindless tele.....................:rotfl: (justified by being on holiday ............lol)

Aril

Hello virtual friends:j
OH bless him has now cleared out the garage so I can hide away my kitchen sink. Even with all the stuff that went last week I'm already starting another pile all be it small of stuff to part with. All this reassessment of the things around us makes me realise what is precious to me and I have looked through books that have just been languishing on my shelves for aeons and discovering that they're full of lovely OS projects for me to have a go at. Funnily enough that's probably why I bought them in the first place but have forgotten:D I actually don't think there's any need for me to borrow any more books from the library for inspiration at present as I've got all I need here. Shall keep it as a backup though as a means of keeping the material girl in her box when I'm longing to buy a new book...she's satiated if she sees me staggering in with 5 books...little does she know that I'll be returning them.
The Civil Partnership do on Saturday went off a treat and everyone is delighted for them. Good grub and good cheer that's what I like:D:D I think my idea of a perfect night in is a lasagne, garlic bread, a bottle of red plonk and good company. There you go nothing sophisticated about me I'm afraid:rotfl::rotfl:
Thought I'd leave you with a quote from Nadine Stair [aged 85] that might be familiar to some of you. It reminds me that we should savour every moment whether good or bad and live for the moment:
If I had to live my life over again I'd dare to make more mistakes next time. I'd relax. I'd limber up. I would be sillier that I had been on this trip. I would take fewer things seriously. I would take more chances. I would take more trips- I would climb more mountains, swim more rivers. I would eat more icecream and less beans. I would perhaps have more actual troubles but fewer imaginer ones.
You see I'm one of those people who live seriously and sanely hour after hour, day after day. Oh, I've had my moments. And if I had to do it over again I'd have more of them. In fact I'd try to have nothing else. Just moments, one after another, instead of living so many years ahead of each day.
I've been one of those people who never goes anywhere without a thermometer, a hot water bottle, a raincoat and a parachute. If I had to do it again I would travel lighter that I have.
If I had to live my life over, I would start barefoot early in the Spring and stay that way later in the Fall. I would go to more dances. I would ride more merry-go-round. I would pick more daisies.

With this in mind OH, the small person and I are having a once in a lifetime 2 week trip to Canada in May/June. Yes it's put a big dent in our savings and I'm sure that there are other much more practical things we could have put it towards but we asked ourselves last year- we are in the lucky position of being able to afford such a trip so what are we waiting for? Well we're not anymore we are going:j
Aril

ppolly

The new unromantic house versus doing up an old wreck to become a dream house discussion is quite interesting. We live in a small new(ish) very dull house. I don't like it much - there is barely any storage space at all (I can't get a breadmaker or sewing machine as there is nowhere to keep them). we got so fed up of it last year that we nearly got involved in buying an old spacious house that needed lots doing to it -but we got cold feet very early on and pulled out. I'm glad we did as this year we may well be moving to a new area altogether due to a job move. If newer properties were designed with a little more imagination, and alot of storage space it would help. They are energy efficient, easy to clean and run, but usually poorly designed with the idea of fitting in as many bedrooms and bathrooms into a small a space as possible, its just not sympathetic to the people who have to live in them.

mary43

Was just about to log off and caught you aril glad I did - I just love that poem............had it printed out and in a folder for a while now and keep reading it over and over. Wise old lady was she.
You have been busy - again - and putting me to shame with my 'lazy day' - must try harder and will !!

polly - new houses are built with such lack of thought and imagination I often wonder what goes on in the minds of the folk who think them up.
But older places can be such hard work and really, anywhere, old or brand spanking new, can become a 'home' very quickly once you've put your mark on it, if you know what I mean.