Dilemma, Dilemma, Dilemma

Tiredbutdetermined

Congratulations on finding the house. I live in a new build so a beautiful staircase makes me very jealous.
Have you put in an offer or do you need to wait and see about the mortgage offers first?

Queen_of_the_Hive

Hello Sunday, hello diary!

Its been a good 9 months since my last MFW diary and wow, I am so glad I wrote what I did as I have a very good update to post!

So in a recap - early Feb 23 our landlord hit us out of the blue with a massive rent increase (it was written into the contract that rent would increase by 3% each year so we were nieve to think this made us immune to the situation at the time, however after renegotating this was effectively torn up!).

We were living in a gorgeous 3 bed flat with garden in our preferred area. In precovid times we were finding life expensive but still able to pay the bills. Then as with a lot of families COVID and post covid cost of living situation really put the pressure on & landlord wanting a lot more for the flat in rent just killed it for us. We came to the point last year that something had to give, my partner is basically retired and i'm just working part time as full time work just hasn't worked for me. We claim no state help and have no plan to do so we just get by 'by hook or by crook'. Anyway we were forced by our circumstances to consider moving from the area we love. We didn't even know if we were eligble for a mortgage but took the plunge to find out. 

Rightmove, Zoopla and all the main property pages were sooo familiar to us, we'd been window shopping for a long time and had a 'perfect' property in mind. A couple of moons came together, and a lovely 3 bed Victorian terrace, with character, storage, good size & small garden (not yard) was reduced in price around the time we started to serously look. I really liked this house from the online listing but at the time it was above our limit. We chucked ourself in and made an offer, it was a bit above what we could afford to pay but its was only by 3k so we are not talking London money.

We had a couple of appointments with independent mortgage advisors, the first just never came back to us, maybe because our circumstances were seen as too challenging, however after putting in a complaint to the brokerage we were then assigned a different advisor and he was fabulous. We were upfront with him from the start and said we are really unsure if this could work but he looked at all the options in the market we presented and some how we applied and was approved by a high street lender. The original sum of money offered was less but with a lot of tussel back and forth we eventually got the funds needed. The mortgage was approved at the peak of last years mortgage price hikes. We initally had a 2 yr fix at just shy of 7% but by a combination of the rates coming down multiple times and shifting to a 5 yr fix we sealed at 5yr fix 4.94% which given everything we were chuffed with.

The purchase of the house was completed just before the end of January this year and we are going to make the move up north just before Easter holidays.

As my original opening post stated, the kids were the major concern. However after having a good chat with ExH and his partner we did agree to keep the kids with them so they can keep their schools, friends and the move will have less of an impact on them. I will openly admit this has been very emotional and at times its really broken me but I know its coming from the right place and putting the kids needs before my own. The kids, my family and friends have been supportive so going to give this new routine a try. Due to the location of the new place, trains will be our best source of transport so this is a concern but between myself and OH we have a plan and hoping benefits from home ownership over increased transport & hotel costs will weigh out better in the long term. Only time will tell but at least in 10 years we know it will be fully paid up.

This week was a quite a big week for us, we made our first mortgage payment (with a mini overpayment of £55.34) and hopefully our last ever rent payment too! Onwards and upwards.

I therefore plan to keep this diary going now that we are officially part of the Mortgage Free Wannabe club

debtfreewannabe321

@Queen_of_the_Hive I've just read through your diary, what a journey eh, rent is so expensive now. Even up north...I moved out of London over 15 years ago as I couldn't afford rent and a deposit to buy....up north was much cheaper then. Now ..my friend has just taken on a rent of £1300 PCM telling me it's the cheapest she could find *ouch*! So you've done the right thing stretching a little to get on the property ladder now. And the house sounds beautiful. 
I co-parent with my ex who is 160 miles away from us. Kids stay with me though and it is tough on the parent who's not in the area. I take it you have room for them in your new house though? My ex takes the kids most holidays (well he did when they were younger these days the kids aren't bothered about ever leaving their room) that could work for you and you get to have the 'fun' time not the stress of school stuff. 
Good luck on your MFW journey 😁

beanielou

How are things?

Queen_of_the_Hive

debtfreewannabe321 said:

@Queen_of_the_Hive I've just read through your diary, what a journey eh, rent is so expensive now. Even up north...I moved out of London over 15 years ago as I couldn't afford rent and a deposit to buy....up north was much cheaper then. Now ..my friend has just taken on a rent of £1300 PCM telling me it's the cheapest she could find *ouch*! So you've done the right thing stretching a little to get on the property ladder now. And the house sounds beautiful. 
I co-parent with my ex who is 160 miles away from us. Kids stay with me though and it is tough on the parent who's not in the area. I take it you have room for them in your new house though? My ex takes the kids most holidays (well he did when they were younger these days the kids aren't bothered about ever leaving their room) that could work for you and you get to have the 'fun' time not the stress of school stuff. 
Good luck on your MFW journey 😁

Morning @debtfreewannabe321 thank you for your kind words. I feel like I am going into a club that not many people really understand so I wanted to say I really appreciated you messaging. The reason for the move came down to cost in the end, where we are currently living its very expensive and what we can afford for our budget has changed dramatically. If we tried to buy, putting everything in it may only be the size of a studio or 1 bed flat. It just wouldn't have worked & equally we are not so attractive on the rental market considering our needs and budget which is absolutely bonkers as up' north we can get much more. The kids do indeed have a bedroom to share and its bigger than what they have now. The currently in a small double room but have to have bunk beds together, but when we move their room will be bigger so that the bunkbeds can be seperated.

I have a plan and trying to do everything I can to stick to it but the costs do worry me but I think the benefits of being back on the property ladder should hopefully outweigh this. I will certainly do all I can to achieve this.

Queen_of_the_Hive

Good Morning @beanielou, i'm good thanks. How are you?

Sistergold

Just catching up with your diary! Welldone for making some very adult decisions! House prices and rentals are likely to continue going up! Buying for me makes sense as you have some control for example forcing payments down by making overpayments! You are so lucky your Ex H is a responsible and honourable man who does right by his children and you have a good coparenting relationship. One thing I must say is that time does fly and your children will soon grow. Having bought a house with time you will find that you have solidified yours, your partner and children’s future. So well done and many people will learn from you so it’s valuable that you shared this online. Things do fall into place when you make bold decisions! 🎉

LadyWithAPlan

Very wise comments @Sistergold

yes kids grow up and at least you can have them properly over the holidays,  long weekends - ultimately putting them first is a gift of love and they also have an amazing opportunity to see what adult real life looks like, how to make sacrifices and win, how balanced humans handle break ups and most of all that they are loved and you are always a call or a whats app video away 

my cheap rent has been going up and up - another 10% this month for some in my building -for some neighbours it’s been £200 more after £200 more last April.. 
I am also about to buy cos I need to get on the right side of this equation 

Drawingaline

So glad to read this amazing update! And so nice to read about adults co parenting properly and putting the kids needs first, it will be tough, but ultimately they gain the stability in the years where it matters, and a happy and less stressed non resident parent who can provide for them better too.

Here's to the future 🎉

Queen_of_the_Hive

Sistergold said:

Just catching up with your diary! Welldone for making some very adult decisions! House prices and rentals are likely to continue going up! Buying for me makes sense as you have some control for example forcing payments down by making overpayments! You are so lucky your Ex H is a responsible and honourable man who does right by his children and you have a good coparenting relationship. One thing I must say is that time does fly and your children will soon grow. Having bought a house with time you will find that you have solidified yours, your partner and children’s future. So well done and many people will learn from you so it’s valuable that you shared this online. Things do fall into place when you make bold decisions! 🎉

Hello @Sistergold ,

Thank you for your kind words of wisdom! Its been a difficult period and I really had to think hard over whether to share this side of my situation but I agree, I think its really important not to gloss over true life struggles and be brave and champion following Plan B to support other families in similar situations. 

Ex and his partner have their moments but the kids are well loved and looked after and they do have a good life with them and that has helped an awful lot.