Everything's An Opportunity

LookingForPeace

Hello everyone 

I'm new to posting, but I have read the forums and the posts from you wonderful people for many years. I've recently had a bit of a wakeup call and thought a diary might do me some good, and maybe anyone else in a similar situation (that'd be great!).

In September, my fiancé decided to leave after 10 years together. Initially, I was crushed. But we'd grown lazy and comfortable with each other, and even though we love and care for each other, we know our friendship is more important than anything else.

I've begun to move on, and part of that is moving on with managing a single income. The debt in my name I see completely as mine - even if it wasn't just spent on me, I always decided to put it on credit. I am looking forward to paying this off while I look at money more healthily in general 

I've recently fallen in love with YNAB. It follows a trend I have of what I call "voluntary cult membership" - using that "cult-like" feeling with eyes wide open to help keep me at something  My mindset has changed quite rapidly with it - my free month is almost up and December has been quite comfortable so far. I feel far more confident and in control of my money than I ever have.

My debts as of today are: 

	Balance as of 10/12/2022
Argos	583
Paypal	700
Satander	2154.56
Halifax	2657.89
MBNA	2240.00
Barclaycard	1500.89
Natwest	551.02
Total	10387.36

I am lucky enough to earn a good wage as a software engineer, and have put £600 a month in YNAB towards repayments. Argos and Paypal are just stupid, stupid debts on crap I didn't need - and both are incurring interest and are my priorities to clear. The others are all credit cards on 0% deals with varying terms left, from June 2023 to August 2024. I get regular 0% offers but understand there might be a time they disappear, so once Argos and Paypal are paid I will focus on them in the order the offers end.

Natwest is a instalments plan with set repayments of £83.75 a month but I believe could be repaid early, but it will be a small amount of interest compared to a worst-case scenario of a larger balance beginning to accrue interest.

I will see how the next year goes as to whether I want to or need to put more towards repayments, but having most of the people in my life now not around as much, or at all, I do need to prioritise getting out and meeting people too. That'll be alongside trying to get "a month ahead" (an emergency fund).

Seeing the £600 I could be assigning to other things in YNAB was my light bulb moment - what a waste of money this is! Oh, and my money is limited, and credit gives the illusion of it not being so! Half the debt is from harder times, the other half "rewarding" ourselves with material things after the harder times.

About £1500 of it was me coping after my fiancé left - I know this is a habit of mine. Oh, life making you feel out of control? Go somewhere nice and spend like you control the world, and buy anything you like! I forgive myself for this, I even forgave myself as I did it. I knew I'd begin to heal and stop in time. Learning I can trust myself has been a great lesson.

Anyway - I'm rambling now. It's an honour to be here with you all. I know so many are suffering right now, and I'm aware I'm not impacted very much. Part of my motivation here is to make sure I'm in a better position to help friends and family if they need it, something I've done in the past without really knowing (or caring?) if it was affordable.

Right - honestly stopping now! Thank you so much if you've read this far. Speak soon.

With optimism,
Matt

Martico

Nice one, Matt. Looks like you've got your head in the right place to address this, looking forward to seeing your progress

enthusiasticsaver

Great first post. I admire you for getting to grips with YNAB. Many finds that it changes their whole approach to finances with allocating every penny. I did the same when money was tighter but using spreadsheets and clear checkbook (the free version). It opens your eyes that if you spend on needless rubbish you are taking money away from some other category. 

It sounds like you have a good plan and I look forward to seeing how you get on. It sounds like you are very aware of the mistakes you made which is half the battle. I know the focus of your diary is paying off the debt but I would ask if you have any emergency savings? It is demoralising to focus on debt reduction then have to use credit in an emergency and see the figure go back up. An Emergency fund is there as a backup if you have an unavoidable bill INSTEAD of a credit card. 

LookingForPeace

Thank you both for the welcome! Much appreciated 

enthusiasticsaver - yes, the emergency fund is part of my plan from now on too. I have YNAB categories for things like appliance replacements, Christmas next year - as well as an "Unexpected" category. I rent and don't drive so I'm lucky that most "emergencies" will probably be limited to lending money, or paying something that was unexpectedly higher than planned. I'm also trying to "get a month ahead" in the bills that I have no choice about, before I look and see whether I want to use that money towards debt repayment or continue to save.

Credit cards are removed from my wallet and any online saved cards - and everything is happening in a brand new current account, which is making a big difference for me 

Thank you so much again for stopping by and commenting, especially when seeing your post signature. You rock!

LookingForPeace

A good day! I recorded everything in YNAB and spent a total of £32.52 on a coffee, food for the fridge and a couple of bits for Christmas.

I'm cooking for my (divorced) Mum and Dad this year - why did I suggest this  I'm sticking to the "it's one meal - with a couple of nicer snacks and drinks", so don't seem to be overspending on things for that. All gifts bought but some delayed because of the world falling apart. They were all budgeted for and I still have £40 left over - which I think I might find somewhere to donate.

Refund coming for a veg box that never arrived (TWICE!) so that will cover an extra one for Christmas dinner too 

bekah89

Found your diary! We do have a similar amount but you’re a few hundred ahead of me 😆 similar again with the varying 0% deals. I don’t recommend paying interest on Barclaycard though they’re the worse 😆
I’ve not used YNAB but keep seeing it mentioned I’ll have a look at that. 

I know the feeling of spending like it’s limitless but I got some amazing holidays out of it haha.
Good luck with cooking Christmas dinner! It would be very tense if my divorced mum and dad were together at Christmas 🤣

AntoMac

Reading through your diary it looks to me that you’re properly switched on to get this sorted. You’ll be very soon be under 10k which should make a big psychological difference 

enthusiasticsaver

Sounds like you are pretty well organised for Christmas. Hope your parents don’t make things awkward on Christmas Day. 

savingholmes

Good luck on your journey.

LookingForPeace

Hi everyone!

Thank you so much for the welcomes and encouragement, I really appreciate you taking a look and saying hello. You're lovely 

@bekah89 - We can do this!! 

This weekend has been spendy but all planned spending and worthwhile. Yesterday was mostly last minute Christmas bits, the main one being for a friend's 12 year old son. He has recently fallen in love with photography, so I'd bought him "Ways of Seeing" by John Berger, reflexively. However, I had totally forgotten what kind of photos are in there  So I picked an alternative yesterday. Close one!! 

Today I rejigged my budget a bit, freeing up cash from things I know I won't need to spend on / pay this month. That helped me find £72.53 which I duly sent to Argos to cut a chunk out my first target! I'm very pleased 

This week should be pretty full of NSDs. I work from home and have food in so not much that needs money. I'll need to pop out to get crackers - which I had totally forgotten about  But apart from that, until Friday (coffee with friend), my balance should stay roughly the same...

I'll still post and say hello, though! 

Thanks again,
Matt

Sarahwithlove

Well done for starting your journey! you have a good amount spare to send to debt repayments which will certainly help. Have you considered seeing if you have anything you could sell that you no longer use/need? Its amazing how quick it all adds up. I am a big YNAB fan and loved using it for 2 years but with the price increase and exchange rate at the moment I have now gone back to a good old spreadsheet. But take advantage of it and get yourself in a good place and hopefully you can then carry those habits forward.