Diary of a 30-something idiot

FacelessNumber

Agree with the above posters, not sure where you are but there will be mental health advice lines available if you search for them. You can't continue to manage everything if your mental health is deteriorating. Hope you manage to get some help sorted!

lillypoo

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/crisis-services/helplines-listening-services/

millymolly22

Just wanted to send you a virtual hug. 
Life seems to be throwing everything at you but yet your DH sits back and lets it all happen.
When you are feeling low about everything you look for the easy option to solve what you think your problem is.
I just wonder how long the EF and savings will last because some days your "emergency" is simply not having enough food and clothing for your daughter.
Look after yourself and your daughter.  You and her need to be top of your list and you must do whatever is right for you both whatever others may say.

stymied

Buy the same glasses again if they’re still available. Sending hugs.

lellybun

Good to hear from you again Fox, but sorry to hear that it's all been getting too much.

Even with the loss on the car, it has gone now and when the cash hits it will give you some breathing room.

I think that others suggestions of contacting MIND is a good idea.

Also a bracing seaside walk may help blow those cobwebs away, that's what I do when everything is getting on top of me xx

uhyeahok

Hey Fox, definitely with your glasses, you can just rebuy the same frames. If the lenses are fine, you won't need new ones if they are a recent prescription.

Hopefully one smaller thing off your plate. I'm rooting for you.

2021rdsunshine

Fox! Thank you for coming back here, I think all of us were getting a bit worried about your absence. I’m sorry that the last few days have been so overwhelming for you and left you with that feeling of being tired of life, it’s completely understandable. Your health has to be your priority,  like others have said please ask for help. We can all go through that sort of feeling sometimes and a few months ago I had to take that step myself of asking for help, after thinking that I was “imune” to anything bad that life would bring to me and thinking that if nothing had broken me in nearly 60 years, I would be able to deal with everything. Well I wasn’t and that’s where help comes in hand. Take care x

helensbiggestfan

Glad to see you post Fox, but I am deeply concerned that you are so overwhelmed.  

Sorry you have taken such a hit on the car but at least it takes the immediate pressure off and gives you a breathing space.  

I second the suggestion to postpone your sterilisation. It may be the best long term outcome for you but now is not the best time.  I am sterilised for health reasons, upon my gynaes advice.  I had the operation when my second son was 10 months old.  I have no regrets and I doubt you will but I would strongly advise you wait a little while, until your life is more settled as you will require downtime post surgery.   

Same with another house.  Apart from the fact that it is not a sellers market at the moment again, it's not a good time for you personally, when your life is in such turmoil.  

I am concerned that your husband shows such little regard for your well being by allowing you to assume such a heavy burden and not working with you to find solutions........seeking employment or at least registering for unemployment benefits.  He could at least assume some responsibility for running the household, cooking, laundry etc to give you some much needed respite.  You desperately need some practical help and support, not just lip service and the odd token gesture.   

Please try to slow down  mentally and stop jumping from one knee jerk solution to another.  I would advise you not to sell any more assets as a quick fix, once they are gone, then what.  You need to make a long term plan and stick to it.  

The only way to tackle such large debt is a two part plan......more money in, and less money going out.  Increase the income coming into the home - there is where your husband needs to step up to the plate.   Also reduce your spending on non essentials......trips away, new bikes, streaming  subscriptions etc.  

I am concerned that your husband is living the life of Riley whilst you are working yourself to the bone and carrying the whole household on your shoulders. If you dont stop you are going to make yourself very ill.  

I am not surprised you feel tired of living. You are burned out. You have no life, you are just existing.  You are drained and exhausted.  Time to start looking after yourself, time for your husband to up his game and take some responsibility. He needs to take much better care of you. 

uralmaid

If you got £8100 for the car and have allocated 4500 between debt, PB's etc what is happening with the other £3600?  Seems a lot to spend just on a parking permit and new knickers.  Why not pay a bit more of one of the debts?  Every little helps surely.

dawnybabes

Please please reach out to someone.  Has your work got a counselling line ? 

Rome wasn’t built in a day, you’re juggling lots of balls.  You and your daughter are the most important people in this so you need to make sure you are ok. X