In my 30s and in London - what do I do?

[Deleted User]

Martico said:

[Deleted User] said:

Martico said:

Weekly season ticket Reading - London is £126, £153 if you want to include a 1-6 travelcard

I might just be a bit behind the times but I don't think £600 a month just to get to work and back is reasonable! I'd be better off renting in Westminster!

As I said, it's about compromise (btw it's about 420 a month if you buy an annual pass). A better place to live further away, with extra travel, or a smaller place in possibly a worse area the closer you get to London. It sounds obvious, but compromises are unfortunately essential, particularly if you're a FTB. Again to repeat, a few years down the line your equity will have improved and you'll find options should start to open out

I would say £420 a month on just getting to work is also bonkers but then this is conservative Britain. It's no surprise that we've fallen so far down the 'life quality' rankings. 

Martico

I'm trying not to make judgements, but to present facts and options. (Even a zone 1-6 travelcard works out at around 230 a month, so unless you are within cycling distance there'll always be a fairly chunky travel cost.) 
If living further out isn't an option, then you're left with worse accommodation closer in, or changing job and/or location if you do think it's important to buy. Those are the realities you have to deal with, I'm afraid. It's not easy, I know

That first purchase, as I said, will never be ideal, but you'll be paying off the equity and the debt burden will gradually reduce through inflation, assuming you get even marginal pay rises.

GixerKate

wildbilljones said:

Martico said:

A first flat or house is pretty much never ideal in terms of price, quality or location if you don't benefit from old money. I'm sure you know that. And yes, things are less affordable now than they ever have been, but there are still possibilities. And those mean compromise on size, location and / or price. That's always been the way.

If it was me in your position I'd look (as I think others have mentioned) at somewhere like Croydon -- super fast links into London, not nearly as bad as its public image, and still very affordable for flats (1 beds still starting around 100K). A few years paying a mortgage there and you should start to see your equity improve and your options open. 

Thanks. I have looked at Croydon and unfortunately that's still out of reach for a person earning £35-40k with a £30k deposit. 

I'm actually very open to moving somewhere in the commuter belt but I haven't seen any feasible options. So I do appreciate all of the advice on here but it's confirmed that there are no real options beyond renting a room for the foreseeable future (this is why I thought it best to pack up and move to Asia). 

Croydon out of reach, really?

Based on your information you can look at places at approx 208k so if you feed into Rightmove that information there are quite a few 2 bed flats available to you, here are some that I've randomly picked as I know the location (quiet but very easy access to central london)

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/107087051#/floorplan?activePlan=1&channel=RES_BUY

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/125090033#/?channel=RES_NEW

You don't have to live in central London.  I lived in Purley for years which is a 25 minute commute into central London with trains 24 hours, many of my friends who lived more centrally often ended up staying over at mine as it was easier and quicker to get to Purley than it was to get to their place.

theoretica

Are any of your good friends in similar situations?  You might want to think about teaming up to buy (or try out renting) a 2 bed place - living with a good friend is very different from renting a room with random people.

If you can get a 2 bed place by maxing out your budget you would have the option of getting extra income through taking in a lodger, or infrequent airBnB type guests.  Again, being the one renting out a room, when you want to, is very different from being the one renting.

I have a relative - in the arts and not hugely paid - who has recently bought in the Leytonstone / Walthamstow area

roaduser3189

What an interesting thread. I think there are some really solid suggestions made by others in terms of finding places to live around London (some even within) that it's worth looking in to. As you mentioned change wont happen overnight in the practical sense. However perhaps a change in attitude is something worth looking at. You cant change things such the cost of houses nowadays or how expensive commuting is, those are not within your control so for your own benefit stop focusing so much energy on the negatives. Think of the things you can change. From what I have gathered you are lonely and alone. I suggest reading something called "The Happiness Trap" , great book and it can change the way you think about your circumstances . I wish you all the best. 

sourpuss2021

theoretica said:

Are any of your good friends in similar situations?  You might want to think about teaming up to buy (or try out renting) a 2 bed place - living with a good friend is very different from renting a room with random people.

If you can get a 2 bed place by maxing out your budget you would have the option of getting extra income through taking in a lodger, or infrequent airBnB type guests.  Again, being the one renting out a room, when you want to, is very different from being the one renting.

I have a relative - in the arts and not hugely paid - who has recently bought in the Leytonstone / Walthamstow area

Leytonstone/Walthamstow has been hip/expensive for 10 years or so.   Relative must have secret source of funds!

[Deleted User]

roaduser3189 said:

What an interesting thread. I think there are some really solid suggestions made by others in terms of finding places to live around London (some even within) that it's worth looking in to. As you mentioned change wont happen overnight in the practical sense. However perhaps a change in attitude is something worth looking at. You cant change things such the cost of houses nowadays or how expensive commuting is, those are not within your control so for your own benefit stop focusing so much energy on the negatives. Think of the things you can change. From what I have gathered you are lonely and alone. I suggest reading something called "The Happiness Trap" , great book and it can change the way you think about your circumstances . I wish you all the best. 

Thanks. I have been trying to focus less on things I can't change (the state of the country and the lack of opportunities). This is why I've been looking into moving abroad. I've also just gotten my Irish citizenship secured, so that's a big step to being able to do other things. Thank you for the book recommendation. 

fewcloudy

wildbilljones said:

roaduser3189 said:

What an interesting thread. I think there are some really solid suggestions made by others in terms of finding places to live around London (some even within) that it's worth looking in to. As you mentioned change wont happen overnight in the practical sense. However perhaps a change in attitude is something worth looking at. You cant change things such the cost of houses nowadays or how expensive commuting is, those are not within your control so for your own benefit stop focusing so much energy on the negatives. Think of the things you can change. From what I have gathered you are lonely and alone. I suggest reading something called "The Happiness Trap" , great book and it can change the way you think about your circumstances . I wish you all the best. 

Thanks. I have been trying to focus less on things I can't change (the state of the country and the lack of opportunities). This is why I've been looking into moving abroad. I've also just gotten my Irish citizenship secured, so that's a big step to being able to do other things. Thank you for the book recommendation. 

Was in the middle of writing longish post on this, so you've spared everyone that treat

Trying to change or control what isn't within your control will only drain your energy and leave you in torment.

We've all read your posts; some agree some don't. And you've been able to vent a bit, and that's ok.

It does however seem there may be options over and above "Move to Asia v's Stagnate in Norwich" (no offence to Norwich!)

Now get down to business on getting this sorted and it looks to me like that has already started to a degree, so well done for that. Can be very difficult to see the light sometimes.

RedFraggle

[Deleted User] said:

roaduser3189 said:

What an interesting thread. I think there are some really solid suggestions made by others in terms of finding places to live around London (some even within) that it's worth looking in to. As you mentioned change wont happen overnight in the practical sense. However perhaps a change in attitude is something worth looking at. You cant change things such the cost of houses nowadays or how expensive commuting is, those are not within your control so for your own benefit stop focusing so much energy on the negatives. Think of the things you can change. From what I have gathered you are lonely and alone. I suggest reading something called "The Happiness Trap" , great book and it can change the way you think about your circumstances . I wish you all the best. 

Thanks. I have been trying to focus less on things I can't change (the state of the country and the lack of opportunities). This is why I've been looking into moving abroad. I've also just gotten my Irish citizenship secured, so that's a big step to being able to do other things. Thank you for the book recommendation. 

If you're amenable to book recommendations I would also suggest SUMO by Paul McGee.
It's helped me a lot

sturgeon

[Deleted User] said:

roaduser3189 said:

What an interesting thread. I think there are some really solid suggestions made by others in terms of finding places to live around London (some even within) that it's worth looking in to. As you mentioned change wont happen overnight in the practical sense. However perhaps a change in attitude is something worth looking at. You cant change things such the cost of houses nowadays or how expensive commuting is, those are not within your control so for your own benefit stop focusing so much energy on the negatives. Think of the things you can change. From what I have gathered you are lonely and alone. I suggest reading something called "The Happiness Trap" , great book and it can change the way you think about your circumstances . I wish you all the best. 

Thanks. I have been trying to focus less on things I can't change (the state of the country and the lack of opportunities). This is why I've been looking into moving abroad. I've also just gotten my Irish citizenship secured, so that's a big step to being able to do other things. Thank you for the book recommendation. 

I recommended several pages back that shared ownership/help to buy resolves your problem, I couldn’t have bought in London without it and did it twice. What are your thoughts on this as the thread is unnecessarily long and this is your solution to live in London? You hadn’t responded.