Ex- work colleague situation re: gifts - WWYD? 1 August 2022 at 7:54AM in Marriage, relationships & families 31 replies 4.6K views

coconutcurls

RogerBareford said:

coconutcurls said:

elsien said:

When colleague A asked if you’d had the gifts would have been the time to say that you hadn’t - then whoever had asked them to drop them off could have chased them up. What did you responx with when they asked? 

The longer you leave it, the more awkward it’s going to get. So I’d probably call colleague A and say if they let you have the number you can call up and fetch them. 

I know it is bad but I didn’t reply to A yet which is fine I can still do it. 

I am not sure if someone asked B or if B volunteered. 

Have you mananged to get the gifts yet?

I hope you have atleast replied to A

Hi. I replied to A and she gave me B's phone number, turns out I already had B's number saved on my phone but I could not bring myself to contact.

Pretty sure I will see everyone around once schools are back and will see what happens (happened)...

RogerBareford

coconutcurls said:

RogerBareford said:

coconutcurls said:

elsien said:

When colleague A asked if you’d had the gifts would have been the time to say that you hadn’t - then whoever had asked them to drop them off could have chased them up. What did you responx with when they asked? 

The longer you leave it, the more awkward it’s going to get. So I’d probably call colleague A and say if they let you have the number you can call up and fetch them. 

I know it is bad but I didn’t reply to A yet which is fine I can still do it. 

I am not sure if someone asked B or if B volunteered. 

Have you mananged to get the gifts yet?

I hope you have atleast replied to A

Hi. I replied to A and she gave me B's phone number, turns out I already had B's number saved on my phone but I could not bring myself to contact.

Pretty sure I will see everyone around once schools are back and will see what happens (happened)...

No matter how aprehesive you feel about contacting B it will be much better to contact them and ask now rather than having to keep wonder about what happened or if you do see people then have to think about what you will say.

-What happens if you see A and they ask what B said when you got hold of them?

-What happens if one of the children or parents who gave a gift sees you and asks if you liked it out of polite conversation? Maybe they wrote a really nice message but you won't be able to thank them as you never got to read it so that could lead to a slightly awkward situation if you act like you don't know what they gave you.

Your best bet was to reply back to A right away and get it sorted. But still your best bet is to just text B now and say "Hi, i've just realised i've never got the gifts that A mentioned were going to be given to me, do you know what might have happened to them?"

Your not accusing them of anything your simply asking them what happened to give them in a friendly way and will give them chance to sort it out.

74jax

coconutcurls said:

RogerBareford said:

coconutcurls said:

elsien said:

When colleague A asked if you’d had the gifts would have been the time to say that you hadn’t - then whoever had asked them to drop them off could have chased them up. What did you responx with when they asked? 

The longer you leave it, the more awkward it’s going to get. So I’d probably call colleague A and say if they let you have the number you can call up and fetch them. 

I know it is bad but I didn’t reply to A yet which is fine I can still do it. 

I am not sure if someone asked B or if B volunteered. 

Have you mananged to get the gifts yet?

I hope you have atleast replied to A

Hi. I replied to A and she gave me B's phone number, turns out I already had B's number saved on my phone but I could not bring myself to contact.

Pretty sure I will see everyone around once schools are back and will see what happens (happened)...

For what reason? If you've been busy just say so, ie - you've only had chance to message now and can you sort out getting the gifts so you can get your Thank You's ready for the start of the year.

coconutcurls

74jax said:

coconutcurls said:

RogerBareford said:

coconutcurls said:

elsien said:

When colleague A asked if you’d had the gifts would have been the time to say that you hadn’t - then whoever had asked them to drop them off could have chased them up. What did you responx with when they asked? 

The longer you leave it, the more awkward it’s going to get. So I’d probably call colleague A and say if they let you have the number you can call up and fetch them. 

I know it is bad but I didn’t reply to A yet which is fine I can still do it. 

I am not sure if someone asked B or if B volunteered. 

Have you mananged to get the gifts yet?

I hope you have atleast replied to A

Hi. I replied to A and she gave me B's phone number, turns out I already had B's number saved on my phone but I could not bring myself to contact.

Pretty sure I will see everyone around once schools are back and will see what happens (happened)...

For what reason? If you've been busy just say so, ie - you've only had chance to message now and can you sort out getting the gifts so you can get your Thank You's ready for the start of the year.

No good reason really. I feel embarrassed on her behalf. Simply because in her shoes I would have delivered everything on the same day. She knows exactly where I live and it is one floor below her and we use the same lift. Could be procrastination or something else on her part but tbh I just don't get it. 

coconutcurls

@RogerBareford

Noted.

It would me so much better if I bumped into her somehow. I will text.

GaleSF63

Is it possible that she left them outside your door and someone took them, and she assumes you have them?

74jax

coconutcurls said:

74jax said:

coconutcurls said:

RogerBareford said:

coconutcurls said:

elsien said:

When colleague A asked if you’d had the gifts would have been the time to say that you hadn’t - then whoever had asked them to drop them off could have chased them up. What did you responx with when they asked? 

The longer you leave it, the more awkward it’s going to get. So I’d probably call colleague A and say if they let you have the number you can call up and fetch them. 

I know it is bad but I didn’t reply to A yet which is fine I can still do it. 

I am not sure if someone asked B or if B volunteered. 

Have you mananged to get the gifts yet?

I hope you have atleast replied to A

Hi. I replied to A and she gave me B's phone number, turns out I already had B's number saved on my phone but I could not bring myself to contact.

Pretty sure I will see everyone around once schools are back and will see what happens (happened)...

For what reason? If you've been busy just say so, ie - you've only had chance to message now and can you sort out getting the gifts so you can get your Thank You's ready for the start of the year.

No good reason really. I feel embarrassed on her behalf. Simply because in her shoes I would have delivered everything on the same day. She knows exactly where I live and it is one floor below her and we use the same lift. Could be procrastination or something else on her part but tbh I just don't get it. 

She could have put them in another room, been meaning to drop them off, been away, a million reasons really. I don't think (obviously I don't know her) there's anything to be embarrassed about (on her behalf or not), she's been busy, you've been busy, it's just something you need to pick up.  I genuinely don't think anything is untoward, maybe that's why I don't see the problem. I just know as a giver of gifts, I'd like the recipient to receive it.
Whenever Amazon (or whoever) have left parcels with neighbours, I've always gone to them, never waited for them to come to me. Slightly different I know, but I'd just make contact. 

coconutcurls

GaleSF63 said:

Is it possible that she left them outside your door and someone took them, and she assumes you have them?

Nope or low chance. The delivery guys leave things outside all the time and it sits there the whole day sometimes. I also leave things outside for Olio members. Plus I know everyone one on my floor and they wouldn't do that. 

frugalmacdugal

Hi,

if not 'bumped into her' for nearly a month, is she maybe away on long holiday?

coconutcurls

frugalmacdugal said:

Hi,

if not 'bumped into her' for nearly a month, is she maybe away on long holiday?

Interesting enough I saw her on the streets from my balcony just after I posted here. Maybe just back from holidays.