The Mental Debt Struggle...

AntoMac

Well done Keedie, a wise and brave decision 

Keedie

Thank you all for your kind words and sorry for the slow reply. The last couple of days have been a crazy whirlwind of activity and emotions. But I now have 3 working days left and then I'm done! Yipeeeee! 💃🏽🎉 

We had a good dinner the other day and it was nice to hang out with my son as he often doesn't have much time for me. The average 18 year old has no real motivation to hang out with their mum really do they?? 🤣. I wasn't very impressed with the cocktails though. We got one each, at a whopping £7.20 each (yes my eyes watered as I agreed for him to have one before I saw the price 🤦🏾‍♀️). He had some rum concoction and was extremely proud that they didn't ask for ID (I think his little beard saved him 😂), and I had a mojito. But mine wasn't sweet enough so I asked them to add more syrup and the waiter told me no can do, as it came out of a can! So they can't adjust the taste. I wasn't best pleased paying £14.40 for two cocktail cans. Even my son cringed when he heard that, as he knows how tight I am 😬. But other than that, the food was delicious and we both inhaled in our dinner in record time and had a good catch up at the same time.

I had a really nice day at work (believe it or not!) on Tuesday as well, as I was working half day and we had our team Christmas lunch and we went bowling and had dinner afterwards. It was quite fun. I had to use those frames that kids have, where you put the ball on and then push it down the ramp because the bowling balls are too heavy and my right rotator cuff is dodgy so my shoulder doesn't have the correct range of movement. One of my colleagues was putting the bowling balls on there for me, bless her. My technique of trying to angle the frame wasn't the greatest, but I didn't come dead last, so there's that 🤣.

I spoke to a few of my colleagues who were all shocked by how I was treated and my sudden departure. Quite a few of them agree with you all and said that I should make a claim against my employer. I do see the strength in my case, but I am still unsure if the effort and stress would ever be worth it. Especially as stress exacerbates my bipolar and my physical health conditions. But I'm going to save all communication and make a timeline of events in case I change my mind. They all said to have a rest and then see what I think, as I have 3 months less one day from leaving.

Anyways, enough about that silly workplace. I got a bit of a financial blow to my care plans and budget on Tuesday. I was reassessed as part of wanting to move to direct payments and I've gone from a nil contribution to £45 a week, and I've not budgeted for that at all. And they've said that if I have arrears, they will not proceed with the direct payments application. So I'm just twiddling my thumbs and waiting for the invoices to come through. I've had to sit down and recalculate the whole budget. And I'm £100 over, so that still needs some work. I told the social worker that I'd literally just handed in my resignation, and she said that I can be financially reassessed once I leave on 10 January 2025. But I will be paid on 24 January 2025, as that is the pay date, so I don't know if I get assessed as being unemployed and having no income as it occurs or if I have to wait until after the final salary. The social worker didn't know either. But I don't want to delay the direct payments process, as it takes 6 weeks to go through, and I've no desire to pay for this silly carer any longer than I have to. Waiting until I'm actually no longer employed before starting the process just makes everything longer, and I'd rather be paying towards my direct payments contribution as soon as possible and not dealing with that awful care agency. 

My son passed his Business Skills exam today, he got 80% and he needed 70% so he's very happy. He said he could have got 100% if he was on the ball. But he's not been well and even vomitted part way through his exam and they had to pause it for him, to get himself sorted and then for him to resume it. So he's done extremely well! Very proud of him 🥳.

beanielou

Ah the joys of direct paymets.  I have just had a bill for £1100 for contribution from April to DEcember!

Well done to your DS.

Keedie

beanielou said:

Ah the joys of direct paymets.  I have just had a bill for £1100 for contribution from April to DEcember!

Well done to your DS.

Say what now?!

Keedie

I've been feeling really worn out, as my cold is just lingering on. My son's had a series of viruses over the last 3-4 weeks, seems to get well, then catches another virus and is worse than before. He's on bed rest at the moment and won't eat, has a fever and is vomiting bile 🥺. The flat is so quiet because he's not watching TV, getting irate on the PS5 when playing/competing with his friends or listening to music. I didn't realise how boring and quiet I must be 🫣, until he's not providing background noise. I'm still just reading and chilling in my bed (albeit with a coughing soundtrack). 

I've got to wrap up and head out today though as I've lots of errands to run and I have to go to my mum's and help her set up a printer. Luckily I've got a mask I can wear, and I've told her to not be in the room with me as I don't want to make her sick.

Budget wise, I'm still over the amount that I have set. I realised it's £225 over and not £100. I'd taken out things which wouldn't actually help me in the long run, so I've put them back in, but reprioritised some of them. At £45 a week for direct payments care, it's £225 for a 5 week month. But it's based on me working, and I'm in my notice period and soon to be unemployed so it will reassessed anyways. I've done my whole budget based on a 5 week month, so that when it is a 4 week month, which is most of the time, I can use that money towards other things I need to take care of.

I have a bit of freelance work for mid-January 2025 into February 2025, as I'll be doing a handover with the Director of Business Development & Strategy, and training on her the HR system. She's got great ideas, and so it won't take too much time, then I can just organise the stuff I need to work on to finish my part. So that should all help with the care costs, and I figured I have lots of stuff to sell and have never made the time to do so. This will be an incentive to figure out that extra bit. I just need to get to the end of March 2025, then I can review everything for quarter 1. I think if I track all of my expenses and focus on sticking to the actual budget (the bit that doesn't include the care costs), week by week, month by month, then it should work. Here's hoping anyways 🤣.

Makingabobor2

Take care going out. I know you like to help your mum, but best you stay and get well first. Far too many bugs going round at the moment, and you want to be well for Christmas. 

Sounds like you will be able to sort your finances out in the new year. Good to get the free lance work. 

Keedie

I'm starting to feel better thanks @Makingabobor2. I sorted out the stuff for my mum but she never really came near me and I was wearing my mask. I dropped her to Sainsbury's as I was leaving and I had my mask on and the window open and I then went home to rest.

My son seems to be feeling more sprightly mood wise, but he's still coughing up a storm. I can hear him from my room and my hearing is rather rubbish. So he must be quite loud 😬. I've drunk so much honey and lemon and water, and gone through two packets of lockets and now I'm officially bored of feeling run down. Nothing seems to be really helping. And so I've felt sorry for myself today. 

I was a bit annoyed with myself today as I made a very basic payment error, that will result in a headache to sort out. I sent a payment of £93 to the Argos Card to bring it down to £200. Then about 45 minutes later, I remembered that I'd send £18 the other week and it wasn't showing on my Argos Card account. I realised that I'd somehow missed off the last 3 digits of my account number when I input the reference and set up the payment last week. I contacted Chase and they gave me the automatic reference number that is produced when you make a faster payment. So now I need to contact Argos tomorrow for them to chase the two payments, that total £111 and credit it to my account with them. At least I got their bank details correct. It's inconvenient but can be reconciled. But I've annoyed myself, as now, when it clears, it'll still be an odd balance of £182. So I'll have to pay another £7 to take it down to £175. 

I think that is a lesson learned not to be making payments in the middle of the night. As I'm clearly not as awake as I believe I am 😬.

But there is one good thing that has happened this weekend. I've been able to relax and not be anxious about working this week. As I know that from Wednesday it's all over. Yippee! 🤸🏾‍♀️🤸🏾‍♀️

Cherryfudge

Wednesday really isn't far away at all is it?! A sort of Christmas present to yourself. 

I make daft errors at night, too - at least you realised and put it right.

I hope you both feel well again soon.

KajiKita

Don’t underestimate how much stress the whole work thing out your immune system under and you were already not in a great place with it. 

Just a few more days and you can stop having to put energy in to defending yourself against it. 

KK

AntoMac

I know plenty of people who have left my place Keedie. Not one of them regrets it. A whole new World of opportunities will be coming your way, and you’ll feel that a massive weight has been lifted from you