I need to leave

Hi, I'm not sure why I'm posting this, I think I need some moral support.

I need to leave. There's too much to go into but I've got 2 children and I've put up with all this going on for about 14 years. Been together 15 years this year. 

I've asked my mum to sort a bed out and a cot, there isn't much room but we need to go and without alerting him we are going.

I feel sick. I don't feel strong enough but I can't cope much longer and my 2 children mean everything to me. 
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Comments

  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,634 Forumite
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    So sorry to hear you are in this position.

    This link may give you support, there's a forum on there:
    I need help - information and support on domestic abuse (womensaid.org.uk)
  • Caseyface
    Caseyface Posts: 313 Forumite
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    Thanks Pollycat.

    I've never left before.

    It's now or never.
  • sammyjammy
    sammyjammy Posts: 7,364 Forumite
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    Keep posting here if it helps, it doesn't matter what you say, have a rant, ask about financial help or whatever you need, there are plenty of people here that have experienced difficulties and come out the other side.

    Take care of yourself and your children, that's all that matters.

    Before you go think about what kind of paperwork you'll need, if you can't take it then photograph it on your phone.
    "You've been reading SOS when it's just your clock reading 5:05 "
  • Caseyface
    Caseyface Posts: 313 Forumite
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    Pollycat said:
    I agree with sammyjammy.
    Carry on posting here if you feel more comfortable (I didn't mean it to sound like you should move over to the Women's Aid forum, just that there will be lots of people who've been in the same situation as you and come out the other side on there).

    Sending hugs.



    I didn't think you meant that ☺️ thanks for replying x
  • Caseyface
    Caseyface Posts: 313 Forumite
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    Hello commenters

    Just to let you know I'm still here another year on. :( 

    However some things I have done in recent weeks which I have never done before is sought help from a DV charity local to me. I have been assigned a case worker and she has been helping via email.
    I have started looking at housing options.

    I've come here tonight just for some support. I know I am doing the right thing but it's so hard. He's threatening suicide. I know it probably is just a threat and it is another manipulation tactic but the thought of going through that on top of it all makes it even more difficult. He is generally a very vulnerable person. I know he's not my responsibility nor are his actions but it's making it worse.

    I don't know why I'm saying it all. I'm so close yet feel so far.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,556 Forumite
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    Caseyface said:
    I don't know why I'm saying it all. I'm so close yet feel so far.
    That's not an unusual reaction - suddenly, it all starts to seem real while before it was just thoughts and possibilities.
    Stay strong - some people find this the very hardest part.
    It can help to look to six months or a year ahead and imagine how much better life will be by then.
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