Lodger keeps bring her BF back

Murphybear

newsgroupmonkey_ said:

Amazin said:

lookstraightahead said:

Did you say they couldn't have guests?

yes I did, she's on housing benefit btw. In the contract, it said she's not supposed to have people staying over but I did tell her in person that I don't mind from "from time to time". 

Just as an aside, if you allow lodgers on Housing Benefit that sit around the house all day, does that not have a huge impact on your bills? (Obviously, we're all now starting to consider these)

You say the tenant doesn’t want to work and is on Housing Benefit.  As far as I aware, but you can check on the Benefits board here, if she refuses to get work she may get her benefit cut.  This could have a knock on effect with the rent not being paid. 

zagubov

You should accept a lodger to have guests over, in general.
Occasional family members temporarily.
Boyfriends/girlfriends regularly but not more than a couple of nights a week for a sustained period, otherwise they need to find two-person accommodation.

canaldumidi

zagubov said:

You should accept a lodger to have guests over, in general if you want.
Occasional family members temporarily if that's what's been agreed.
Boyfriends/girlfriends regularly, intermittantly or never as discussed at the start,  but not more than a couple of nights a week (or 3 or 5 )for a sustained period depending on the landlord's preference, otherwise they need to find two-person accommodation.

Agree entirely as amended!

sourpuss2021

Murphybear said:

newsgroupmonkey_ said:

Amazin said:

lookstraightahead said:

Did you say they couldn't have guests?

yes I did, she's on housing benefit btw. In the contract, it said she's not supposed to have people staying over but I did tell her in person that I don't mind from "from time to time". 

Just as an aside, if you allow lodgers on Housing Benefit that sit around the house all day, does that not have a huge impact on your bills? (Obviously, we're all now starting to consider these)

You say the tenant doesn’t want to work and is on Housing Benefit.  As far as I aware, but you can check on the Benefits board here, if she refuses to get work she may get her benefit cut.  This could have a knock on effect with the rent not being paid. 

If she's on Housing Benefit (rather than Universal Credit) then there is never any requirement to look for work.  She can continue getting it till the world stops turning.   However it is only enough to cover rent and she would need additional income to cover all her other living costs.  HB closed to new claims in about 2018 anyway, so if she claimed after that she'd be on Universal Credit, which does require you to look for work after a certain period of time.

About the guest issue, I think if lodgers want the freedom and privacy to have who they like over, they need to become a tenant somewhere.   Since they are lodgers then they have to accept that they're living with their LL who can set rules on their behaviour.   That's the big downside to being a lodger, but it's pretty standard.

I've experienced it from both sides.  I lodged for a year or two with a couple in their 50s and I would never have been allowed to have had anyone back.  It was very much their home and I accepted it in exchange for cheap rent and nice place.  To be honest I wasn't happy there but I was young and the rest of my life was good and filled with people so I could put up with it. 

Nowadays I'm the tenant of a 2-bed flat in London and for years I'd sublet the second room (though stopped with Covid).  I'd always make absolutely clear to prospective lodgers that guests are not allowed at all.  The bedrooms are next to each other and I don't want to be kept awake by the sound of shagging, and I don't want to be crowded out of the kitchen when they are cooking a meal.   Also the lodger only pays 1/3 of the cost that I pay in rent and bills for the flat. 

I also don't have guests myself so at least I can tell a lodger there won't be anyone else around either.  I  did move towards aiming for lodgers who were only looking to stay for 2-6 months anyway, so I wasn't trapping them in a gloomy situation. 

breaking_free

Okay this is going to sound sexist but here we go.

I'm female and I've almost always had male lodgers precisely because of this issue of the boyfriend staying over. When a male lodger gets a girlfriend he inevitably ends up staying at her place (but not the other way round it seems). I've had a few lodgers where I almost never saw them because they were always at their girlfriend's place and just used their room for storage. Then one time my best pal needed a place to rent so I let her lodge with me; her bloke was there every - single - night! I was on the verge of laying down the law when they broke up (and he started stalking her, but that's another story).

OP your agreement specifically guarded against the situation so you need to enforce it. Good luck.

Exodi

Life's too short. Serve notice, get a new lodger.

You clearly stated the rules and this is a continued and flagrant breach of them.

Slinky

breaking_free said:

Okay this is going to sound sexist but here we go.

I'm female and I've almost always had male lodgers precisely because of this issue of the boyfriend staying over. When a male lodger gets a girlfriend he inevitably ends up staying at her place (but not the other way round it seems). I've had a few lodgers where I almost never saw them because they were always at their girlfriend's place and just used their room for storage. Then one time my best pal needed a place to rent so I let her lodge with me; her bloke was there every - single - night! I was on the verge of laying down the law when they broke up (and he started stalking her, but that's another story).

OP your agreement specifically guarded against the situation so you need to enforce it. Good luck.

An ex-boyfriend's parents rented out about 4 rooms in their house to lodgers. They only ever had blokes renting from them as they found that any female guests brought home would leave the house when the bloke left, whereas previous female lodgers would leave the house and their male guest wouldn't necessarily go at the same time.