Mortgage free in Forever Home :-)

KajiKita

I’ve had a really tough work week. To the point that I have contacted the anonymous employee helpline and am waiting for a set of 6 counselling appointments. I’ve also had a large molar collapse and realise I almost don’t have an effective chewing surface any more - emergency dentist appointment booked for lunchtime on Monday so am working from home that day - very relieved to be doing that rather than going into work tbh. So very, very tired atm. I have at least booked the week off for our staycation in September. 

Finances wise:
- I am back on Qm33 to some degree - hitting c. £5 per week for OPs. 

- Went to Gr@petree for various vegan foodstuffs today - they will push my grocery spend up this week but should help spread cost in future months. One thing though …. I have recently discovered I love wild rice, but it is sooooo expensive! Gonna do a goggle and see if I can find a cheaper source. 

- Broadband fibre is available locally now (they were flushing out the lines last weekend and all neighbours here got emails in the week). I have had a quick rummage at the deals for fibre via MSE and it looks like giggleclear won’t actually be the best option in spite of all their ‘this select deal must be taken up within 55 days’ whiffle 🙄😉 … more research and a decision needed on this one. This should reduce our regular outgoings a touch more as we are on mifi atm. 

- Had a call from the life insurance company today reviewing our cover. They could have saved us £1.53 pcm by switching provider but the cheaper option was one with a not great customer service reputation, so we have stayed with the one we have had since the start of this mortgage. The good news is that the policy does 100% cover the remaining mortgage which I wasn’t 100% sure of, so I do t have to worry about getting a different policy / top up policy. 

- Good news on the lounge project - Mr KK’s boss has let him have all the lengths of and accessories for the wood burner flue that were lying around in a works shed for free, so that has saved us several £100s 👍😊 Target date for removing the doors and rebuilding the wall behind where the fire is, is next weekend. Building inspector happy with photos sent so far. 

Did some more planting in the new sit-spot border - ‘accidentally’ went into the garden centre local to me 😉 and came back with a few filler plants, a lovely ‘sherbetty’ echinacea, a Nepeta and a gorgeous blue/violet geranium - apparently the latter is sterile so just flowers and flowers and flowers. 😊 If it does well I will split that and spread that all round the garden in future years. Didn’t quite get it all in the ground as we have had some really heavy rainstorms today! Hoping tomorrow will be calmer and a little less humid. 

KK

skint_spice

Sorry to hear about your week, I hope the counselling sessions start soon and help you feel better.

KajiKita

skint_spice said:

Sorry to hear about your week, I hope the counselling sessions start soon and help you feel better.

Thank you x

SandyShores

Hope you are okay Kajikita.  Glad you are taking advantage of the counselling sessions.  Dentist problems always miserable and don't help, so glad you are getting sorted.  Take care.  xx

MissRikkiC

Sending solidarity and hope that the counselling sessions help and work gets less intense. 

KajiKita

SandyShores said:

Hope you are okay Kajikita.  Glad you are taking advantage of the counselling sessions.  Dentist problems always miserable and don't help, so glad you are getting sorted.  Take care.  xx

Thank you - feel like I am crumbling away …. 🙄😉😂

KK

KajiKita

MissRikkiC said:

Sending solidarity and hope that the counselling sessions help and work gets less intense. 

Thank you, as I know you’ve had a tough week as well. Hoping we both have a better week next week! 

KK

Tescodealqueen

Sorry to hear about your week you have definitely done the right thing in looking for some support. I feel your pain with the dentist situation I am having similar in the last year and losing teeth is not fun

SandyShores

Look after yourself Kajikita, sending a virtual hug x

KajiKita

Thanks @Tescodealqueen and @SandyShores ❤️

I did a TRE session this evening whilst Mr KK was cooking dinner and had an observation arise … One of the many reasons why last week was tough was because a management colleague I normally ‘feel safe’ with, judged me harshly (I think she called it wrong - she told me to apologise to the person she had overheard me interacting with and she had become distressed by it - when I did, he was completely nonplussed that I might think I had behaved inappropriately and, whilst it was actually happening, another member of my team started defending what I was saying ….). This manager has had a stack of trauma in her life, a lot of it unresolved, and is massively sensitive / sensitised to anger or aggression, or anything that looks or feels like it. 

We have recently moved offices, and as a result this manager and I are sitting a LOT closer together than we were before. There has been research done showing that the energy emitted by the heart (whether you think of it as a physical organ, an energetic one or both) can be detected up to 10m away. I think that the trauma that we both carry, is now interacting on an energetic level as we are sitting so much closer. It came to me, as part of this cogitation, that the energy of Kwan Yin would be helpful (Kwan Yin is a Bodhisattva in the Shingon Buddhist tradition, but variants of this archetype appear in many traditions - she embodies compassion and brings emotional healing). I have a small, understated, discreet, pretty Kwan Yin statue and it came to me that I could take that into work and put it on the windowsill near me. I’ve had it a long time and it sat on my altar through most of the 8 years of daily services I did, so energetically she should be fairly well charged up! 😉 On a more practical psychological level, it will also remind me, in the hurly-burly of the day to keep coming back to a place of compassion, both for others and for myself. I have moved her into the spare room so I remember to take her into work with me when I take my work laptop back in after working from home tomorrow. 

Had an inevitably quiet day - kept trying to get out in the garden but it’s been blazing sun / raging humidity / stair-rods rain in endless repeating sequence today, so in the end I gave up! 😉🤷‍♀️
I did cook myself a sausage casserole batch though, so it hasn’t been a completely unproductive day 😊

KK