Missy’s Surviving the storm so we can dance in the rain.

slm6002

Hi Missy, I hope you are having a lovely bank holiday weekend and that OH is still on board with money saving

missymoo81

I’m sorry for being away, but I need some help and support and I know you are the people to give it to me. I have friends in the outside but this is all very new and raw and I don’t know who to turn to. I found out my husband has been cheating the whole 5 years we have been together. I have told him to leave. Trying to work out my life right now and what to do and how I can cope financially. Feel a bit like a robot and in a bit of a daze. But I’m ok.

RelievedSheff

Oh no Missy. That's horrible to find out.

I can't offer you much in the way of advice having never been in the situation myself. But I can offer you a big virtual hug and a listening ear.

missymoo81

Thank you @RelievedSheff I appreciate it

CanalBoatTime

My response when I found out was to deal with the finances first (I stopped his credit card, which was on my account), and took care of stuff on bank accounts. This gave me time to deal without the rug being pulled from under me any further.  Be strong, sort out the stuff that needs sorting, and create some time to safely deal with the emotional stuff later.  Good Luck

Toni'sfriend

Aw, Missy. I am so sorry. I have been reading your diary all along and I know you've been trying so hard to sort things out. This is a shock but you are a strong woman. That's very obvious.

I agree with CanalBoatTime.

• Sort out the finances. See a solicitor if that's what it takes. 
• Make sure that May and Roo are OK
• Be kind to yourself

My marriage broke up when my son was 13. Not for the same reasons. You can and will get through this. Come on here to get support, have a rant or just put your thoughts down.

Wishing you lots of luck. xxx

slm6002

I am so sorry to hear this Missy.  Having been through it recently I really understand and remember how it feels.  Like @CanalBoatTime after the initial shock I looked at how me and the kids would cope financially without XH.  I signed up to universal credits and got the ball rolling as I knew my income alone would not support us and it takes a little while to set up.

Has he actually left the house now or offered any solution to the living situation?  Is the business in both names?

What I will say is that you and your children will get through it.  There will be tears and anger but you will realise that you are stronger than you think and that you can do it without him x

missymoo81

Thank you all so much, it’s taking so much being strong in front of the children, normal even. But each time I’m in my own I just don’t know what to do with myself. I just wilt. I am truly heart broken.

Toni'sfriend

Of course you are. How could you not be? You will get through this, One day at a time. Look after yourself (as best you can). We're here for you. xxx

Bunny_mumma

Sorry to hear this Missy. Please take time to look after yourself. I have no real advice but offer virtual hugs. 

You are strong and you will get through this, just take each day as it comes xx