Care Home resident and personal expenditure

tooldle

pollypenny said:

I don't understand the hairdresser charges in care homes. If an elderly woman needs help to bath and dress, that would surely involve hair washing a couple of times a week. It wouldn't be beyond a carer to give it a quick blow dry.  

That is what happened where my father was, not for him, obviously. 

My mum’s place has a visiting hairdresser. She comes in one day per week. I wouldn’t expect the care staff to cut mums hair, although a few brave staff did give it their best shot through lockdown. Helping a resident to shampoo and dry their hair is normal.
i take mum outside of the home to our choice of hairdresser.

KxMx

My late Nan always had her hair done weekly by a hairdresser as that was what she was used to doing and saw as normal.
A shampoo and set every single week with perms every so often was I believe the routine for ladies several decades ago. 

My mother & I see once every month (cut and blow dry) as normal. 

Pennylane

My Mum was in a care home with dementia and before it got too bad she told me she didn’t want to have a lot of money in her room. So we agreed that she would only ever have about £10 in her purse for sweets etc.  As they had a visiting hairdresser and, as I visited her every other day I paid the hairdresser when I went in that was usually about £15.  The careworkers always painted all the ladies nails and there was no charge.  

I bought all her underwear, nighties, clothes etc. A foot health practitioner came in a couple of times to cut her toenails and charged her £20 which  she thought was expensive so I took over that job and soaked them, filed them and massaged them for free! 👍

If she needed the dentist or optician, I took her and dealt with any bills.

The home should certainly be keeping account of money she spends and they must have appointment books for hairdresser, chiropodist etc so you can check. 

My Mum was in another home for 8 months prior to this and I didn’t trust them at all. The owner used to sidle up to me and give me a “bill” for toiletries.  That’s all it said.  I knew she went in with everything she needed but I didn’t want to make a fuss so paid the £15.  A month later I got a bill for £20 and politely said I needed an itemised bill.  There was no way a few items could cost £20.  They got shirty and said they hadn’t got time to do that.  So I said from now on don’t provide any toiletries, I will buy it all myself.   Since then I have spoken to 3 families who have loved ones in that home and the owner is still up to that old trick but they all say they just pay it as they don’t want to antagonise the owner in case she takes it out on their parents.  If she bills people £20 every month x 30 residents that is a very nice bonus for her!! £7,200 a year!  

Spendless

Yes, it's a visiting hairdresser and same with chiropodist. No idea how frequently they visit though. Certainly a weekly shampoo and set and a perm every 12 weeks was/is a 'thing' because my Mum is a (mostly) retired 'old ladies' hairdresser. She did my Nan's hair up until she moved into the care home.   Mum has said several times over the years that the visiting hairdresser to the home charged more than her prices. I've always sort of assumed Mum therefore knew the prices charged at Nan's home. Now I'm wondering if Mum has just guessed this due to Nan's spending and doesn't actually know.

Toiletries - that's a possibility. Prior to the lockdowns this was something I would buy my Nan for birthday/Xmas presents as there's so little I can actually get her. I haven't since the pandemic though as there were restrictions on what was taken in plus no idea what she needed. Some money may be for this but I wouldn't thought it all. Not even my teenage daughter spends the same on wash stuff and that's saying something hahah. If she's charged a monthly amount though, I can see how that can build up (and possibly account for the £90 arears when we'd mostly been in lockdown). Something worth checking out - thank you.

From all the replies and the conversation me and Dad had with Mum when we asked her 'what on earth is Nan spending the money on?' I don't think Mum can have ever seen an itemised bill on what the money goes on in the 6+ years she's been in there. I suspect Mum has taken the view it's Nans to spend how she wishes and  it's only now when she's heading to the end of the money, coupled with the recent increases in how much she's getting through that has flagged a concern. Going forward she needs to ask them for some record on how Nan spends her 'pocket money'  Now to have that conversation with Mum, hopefully before she takes another wad of cash upto the care home.

Pennylane

Spendless …. Yes, your Mum needs to make sure receipts are issued for things like hairdressing, footcare etc.  Mum’s visiting hairdresser shampooed and set her hair once a fortnight and that was £15 and about every 3 months she permed it and I think that was about £25.  The hairdresser always issued receipts/bills without being asked. She said it was to cover herself too, which makes perfect sense.  

I actually think this whole business of paying extra for toiletries in care homes is very mean anyway. If you are paying £900+ a week then surely they should provide some soap and toothpaste for you.   I sent my Mum into care with a massive bottle of Radox bath creme.  When i got the first bill and queried it I was told they had bought her a bottle as hers was all gone.  They got one bath a week in there so there is no way that was true.  

You also need to check about your Mum’s footcare bills.They usually visit every 6 weeks.  expect to pay more for a qualified chiropodist/podiatrist and a lot less for a Foot Health practitioner who is basically only allowed to cut nails and has probably just done a weekend course not a degree course like a chiropodist.  They never work in the NHS and they are not allowed to call themselves chiropodists as it is a protected title. They definitely should issue receipts. 

Pollycat

A friend of mine whose Mum was in a care home bought her Mum some expensive hand wash as she liked the scent.

She put it in her Mum's private bathroom.

When she visited her Mum ,she popped to the communal toilet and there was the handwash - for all to use.

Spendless

I've spoken to Mum. She's going to take Nan some more cash and ask the care home what she is spending it on. I asked if she kept details on what date she gives Nan money. She said yes but would have to look it back up. Not sure from that if she jots it down or just gets a receipt from any withdrawals. I said if she's aware of dates then she can say to the care home between x and y date Nan spent £x and can you tell me what on. My Dad wasn't keen on that as he thought it sounded accusingly. My reply was that it didn't have to come across that way and in 6 years of never seeing what Nan is spending her money on, it's perfectly reasonable to ask to do so, it's in the care homes own interest too. 

Will update as and when there's further news. Thanks everyone for the help. 

Mojisola

It's very remiss of the care home not to have a procedure for record keeping for residents' cash flow.  It opens them up to accusations of theft.  If they aren't keeping detailed records, how can they show that the residents' money has been spent by or on behalf of  the residents and not stolen?

Pollycat

Spendless said:

I've spoken to Mum. She's going to take Nan some more cash and ask the care home what she is spending it on. I asked if she kept details on what date she gives Nan money. She said yes but would have to look it back up. Not sure from that if she jots it down or just gets a receipt from any withdrawals. I said if she's aware of dates then she can say to the care home between x and y date Nan spent £x and can you tell me what on. My Dad wasn't keen on that as he thought it sounded accusingly. My reply was that it didn't have to come across that way and in 6 years of never seeing what Nan is spending her money on, it's perfectly reasonable to ask to do so, it's in the care homes own interest too. 

Will update as and when there's further news. Thanks everyone for the help. 

It's your Nan's money entrusted to the care home to use/spend for your Nan's benefit.

Your Mum has every right to ask what the money has been spent on.

I agree with Mojisola - very remiss not to provide regular information on what the money has been spent on.

JGB1955

I would expect the care home to keep meticulous records of income and expenditure for each of their residents.  My father was in his nursing home for 18 months before his death - I 'topped up' his patient account several times whilst he was there (by bank transfer - they wouldn't accept cash) and upon his death they repaid the £54.20 in his patient account within days.  No care home should be surprised to be asked for those details.