Money owed to us for car loan

justworriedabit

Hi OP

Not really aimed at you directly but a point of order.  People that lent their children money to buy a car, have IMHO earned the upset that follows.   All of our children, us, my parents, etc, Mr J's parents etc have NEVER bought a car on loan never mind borrow money from family/friends to but a car.


Look at it like this - if you are borrowing thousands any money to buy a car from parents and the parents fall fro that, ask yourself this, what happens when one or both lose their job, lose overtime, rent goes up or they have fallen out of love with that car and their holiday is a priority, car breaks down, who pays you back and especially if the couple break up.

If our kids as us for money to but a car it would have been a NO and if one of them turned up with a car on hp payments it would have been a slap across the back of the head a light one and the gifts we've given atm would not have happened.

TBagpuss

as others have said, I think your chances are good, as you have written proof that it was a loan, plus some repayments. Even if it is seen as a joint loan, normally they would have joint and several liability and you're fee to to pursue either or both of them for the debt (and if he has kept the car then it makes sense that he'd pay for it!) 

maman

I think you have both a legal claim and a point of principle. I'd pursue it IF I was confident that he and your daughter had genuinely split the debts they accrued during the relationship. If he is paying off more than his fair share or the debts were for items that were patently for your daughter then I would feel uncomfortable chasing him. 

68ComebackSpecial

SueDerbyshire said:

Thank you for your reply. I don't have his address but will try to find it. I have told him I will take him to court after he refused a suggestion that he paid £10 a month for now but he just said "got for it, you are not receiving another penny from me". He also sent my daughter a message on Instagram saying she needs to tell me to back off!

I can't see any other option but to take hike to court.

Thanks for your help. 

You're going to need his address in order to serve him with a Letter Before Action and then the court documents (if the former doesn't prompt him to reach an agreement).

Keep_pedalling

justworriedabit said:

Hi OP

Not really aimed at you directly but a point of order.  People that lent their children money to buy a car, have IMHO earned the upset that follows.   All of our children, us, my parents, etc, Mr J's parents etc have NEVER bought a car on loan never mind borrow money from family/friends to but a car.


Look at it like this - if you are borrowing thousands any money to buy a car from parents and the parents fall fro that, ask yourself this, what happens when one or both lose their job, lose overtime, rent goes up or they have fallen out of love with that car and their holiday is a priority, car breaks down, who pays you back and especially if the couple break up.

If our kids as us for money to but a car it would have been a NO and if one of them turned up with a car on hp payments it would have been a slap across the back of the head a light one and the gifts we've given atm would not have happened.

So if you were in a position to provide an interest free loan for an adult child to buy a reliable car they needed to get to work, the only choices you would leave them is to by on old unreliable (and potentially dangerous) banger, or force them into borrowing money, probably at a high interest rate, but if they took option be you would subject them to physical violence.

I only have one rule for family loan and that is to treat it as a gift that I will hopefully get back. The last time we lent money to one of our children was to buy a modest car. We wrote half of that off when my DIL became pregnant. If you can’t afford to lose the money then best not to lend in the first place.

Ganga

Keep_pedalling said:

justworriedabit said:

Hi OP

Not really aimed at you directly but a point of order.  People that lent their children money to buy a car, have IMHO earned the upset that follows.   All of our children, us, my parents, etc, Mr J's parents etc have NEVER bought a car on loan never mind borrow money from family/friends to but a car.


Look at it like this - if you are borrowing thousands any money to buy a car from parents and the parents fall fro that, ask yourself this, what happens when one or both lose their job, lose overtime, rent goes up or they have fallen out of love with that car and their holiday is a priority, car breaks down, who pays you back and especially if the couple break up.

If our kids as us for money to but a car it would have been a NO and if one of them turned up with a car on hp payments it would have been a slap across the back of the head a light one and the gifts we've given atm would not have happened.

So if you were in a position to provide an interest free loan for an adult child to buy a reliable car they needed to get to work, the only choices you would leave them is to by on old unreliable (and potentially dangerous) banger, or force them into borrowing money, probably at a high interest rate, but if they took option be you would subject them to physical violence.

I only have one rule for family loan and that is to treat it as a gift that I will hopefully get back. The last time we lent money to one of our children was to buy a modest car. We wrote half of that off when my DIL became pregnant. If you can’t afford to lose the money then best not to lend in the first place.

Agree with this 100% ,i always tell my wife that when we  "lend " money to my sons ex to treat it as a gift as the chance of seeing it again is slim and it is to support our grandchildren.

SueDerbyshire

I agree with lending money to family, we had no support when we started a new family and had to both work from 6am to 8pm every day just to get by and that's why we are there and are happy to support/lend money to our grown up children, however, we have given them alot of money in the past and paid for holidays abroad for them and our grandchildren, which we have no regrets and have amazing memories for it but I also think it's a good lesson in life to have to work for luxuries, not just have money on a tap, therefore we suggested a loan, not a new car as a gift. Also, it was mainly for my daughters ex, he needed it to get to work and if he couldnt get to work it would affect the whole family financially, so it's a win win situation.

I think the partner knew what he was doing, he was already seeing someone else, knew we would offer to lend him/them the money and just accepted it, then 3 months later he left my daughter, so it leaves a bad taste in your mouth to be honest.

The point I've tried to make though is that he took the car and agreed to pay a set amount back to us each month until his share was paid for and that hasnt happened or he could have left the car behind with no debt.

On a separate note, I have the partners mums address, so if I can't find his new address can I use his old address, his mums?

Thanks again for all your help and support. 

justworriedabit

Keep_pedalling said:

justworriedabit said:

Hi OP

Not really aimed at you directly but a point of order.  People that lent their children money to buy a car, have IMHO earned the upset that follows.   All of our children, us, my parents, etc, Mr J's parents etc have NEVER bought a car on loan never mind borrow money from family/friends to but a car.


Look at it like this - if you are borrowing thousands any money to buy a car from parents and the parents fall fro that, ask yourself this, what happens when one or both lose their job, lose overtime, rent goes up or they have fallen out of love with that car and their holiday is a priority, car breaks down, who pays you back and especially if the couple break up.

If our kids as us for money to but a car it would have been a NO and if one of them turned up with a car on hp payments it would have been a slap across the back of the head a light one and the gifts we've given atm would not have happened.

So if you were in a position to provide an interest free loan for an adult child to buy a reliable car they needed to get to work, the only choices you would leave them is to by on old unreliable (and potentially dangerous) banger, or force them into borrowing money, probably at a high interest rate, but if they took option be you would subject them to physical violence.

I only have one rule for family loan and that is to treat it as a gift that I will hopefully get back. The last time we lent money to one of our children was to buy a modest car. We wrote half of that off when my DIL became pregnant. If you can’t afford to lose the money then best not to lend in the first place.

Highlighted bit. Not a "position" I've been in, not my parents or grandparents as we are taught not to run before we can walk. There is public transport you know.

If kids are borring money to buy a car, how on earth are they going to ensure its kept road legal etc especially when they get a few punctures, tyres need to be replaced et, etc.

Use public transport until you can afford to not just buy your own car but insure it, tax it, mot it, service it, and unexpected repairs it and the possibility of parking tickets and speeding fines, etc, etc.



HTH.

justworriedabit

Ganga said:

Keep_pedalling said:

justworriedabit said:

Hi OP

Not really aimed at you directly but a point of order.  People that lent their children money to buy a car, have IMHO earned the upset that follows.   All of our children, us, my parents, etc, Mr J's parents etc have NEVER bought a car on loan never mind borrow money from family/friends to but a car.


Look at it like this - if you are borrowing thousands any money to buy a car from parents and the parents fall fro that, ask yourself this, what happens when one or both lose their job, lose overtime, rent goes up or they have fallen out of love with that car and their holiday is a priority, car breaks down, who pays you back and especially if the couple break up.

If our kids as us for money to but a car it would have been a NO and if one of them turned up with a car on hp payments it would have been a slap across the back of the head a light one and the gifts we've given atm would not have happened.

So if you were in a position to provide an interest free loan for an adult child to buy a reliable car they needed to get to work, the only choices you would leave them is to by on old unreliable (and potentially dangerous) banger, or force them into borrowing money, probably at a high interest rate, but if they took option be you would subject them to physical violence.

I only have one rule for family loan and that is to treat it as a gift that I will hopefully get back. The last time we lent money to one of our children was to buy a modest car. We wrote half of that off when my DIL became pregnant. If you can’t afford to lose the money then best not to lend in the first place.

Agree with this 100% ,i always tell my wife that when we  "lend " money to my sons ex to treat it as a gift as the chance of seeing it again is slim and it is to support our grandchildren.

Please look up the definitions of "lend" & "gift"

Year ago we lent "lend" money to a relative buying a second business and it was several k's as their money was
tied up in a sale and it had been delayed by a few days and the new business was via auction but it was NOT a "gift." A "gift" is something you give, no strings attached. Ro "lend" is give something and excpect it back

HTH

justworriedabit

SueDerbyshire said:

I agree with lending money to family, we had no support when we started a new family and had to both work from 6am to 8pm every day just to get by and that's why we are there and are happy to support/lend money to our grown up children, however, we have given them alot of money in the past and paid for holidays abroad for them and our grandchildren, which we have no regrets and have amazing memories for it but I also think it's a good lesson in life to have to work for luxuries, not just have money on a tap, therefore we suggested a loan, not a new car as a gift. Also, it was mainly for my daughters ex, he needed it to get to work and if he couldnt get to work it would affect the whole family financially, so it's a win win situation.

I think the partner knew what he was doing, he was already seeing someone else, knew we would offer to lend him/them the money and just accepted it, then 3 months later he left my daughter, so it leaves a bad taste in your mouth to be honest.

The point I've tried to make though is that he took the car and agreed to pay a set amount back to us each month until his share was paid for and that hasnt happened or he could have left the car behind with no debt.

On a separate note, I have the partners mums address, so if I can't find his new address can I use his old address, his mums?

Thanks again for all your help and support. 

Not us and Mr J's family who is well off were insisting we did not take out what was consider a big mortgage at the time. We jointly agreed its a no, no and we have both worked up to 80 hours a week in the past and it was hard but it made us proud to stand on our own two feet.

If you've read my other posts here you will note we have gitfted good amounts to avoid taxes etc as per the law but only done so as our children are not borrowing money on ANYTHING other than their property or btl.

We are grateful the way my parents brought me up as is Mr J and we are following the footsteps of our tried and tested family stance re money management and not trying to run before you can walk.