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Money Moral Dilemma: Should I ask the neighbours staying with us for rent?

edited 6 April at 3:00PM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
45 replies 40.1K views
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  • meknowalot-51meknowalot-51 Forumite
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    What exactly was the initial agreement you had over two months ago?To say it could be a month or so looks like it's going to be at least double,has this never cropped up whilst your all sat there watching the box?All you seem to be concerned about is money so just go with it and remember the're your invited neighbours who are going to be there when this stressfull situation is over.They want this to end as much as you,probably more,you've all done pretty well so far.Two months in lockdown and next monday(april 12th) you can all go to the nearest beer garden...............who'se going to pay?????
  • sheath12sheath12 Forumite
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    I think if your neighbours are contributing towards bills that's fair but wear and tear for furniture definitely not. I'm sure their stay has gone on far too long if you need to ask this question. Just remember a friend  in need etc and give yourself a pat on the back for helping out.
  • edited 12 April at 6:30PM
    InAInA Forumite
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    edited 12 April at 6:30PM
    My initial reaction to this post was that it's too late to have this conversation without potentially damaging what appears to be a good relationship, and my advice would be to always set clear boundaries in advance, in spite of the neighbours appearing to have a lot of brass neck (if you take this post at face value).
    However, the whole scenario of neighbours coming to live with you seems too strange to contemplate which leads me to believe that relevant information is missing. Either, the relationship with the neighbours is much closer than has been indicated, for example, they are also related in some way (extended family). Or the host has previously benefitted from generous neighbourly help and is now returning the favour, for example, the host could be an elderly person living on their own, and it may be that they have received assistance with shopping, attending medical appointments etc.
    IMO, the idea of charging for wear and tear does not come from the same mind as the kind of person who would make such a generous offer in the first place. So, either they felt it was an obligation or there is something else that we haven't been told.
  • crmismcrmism Forumite
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    You have my sympathy.
    Knowing nothing about your neighbours beyond the fact that they're outstaying their welcome, it's impossible for third parties to offer useful advice. Naturally, their very presence is bound to impact on your private life, and I should have thought that the very least they could do in a neighbourly way is offer to move out and rent somewhere else for the time being, especially if (until now perhaps) you have always got on with them.
    Maybe you could give them one or two hints, as they must be aware of the extra expense of hosting them? If those fail, it rather looks as if you'll have to grin and bear the wear and tear on your furniture, remember never to offer them your home in future, and just hope that they return your generous favour by treating you and the rest of your family to something special like a day out somewhere, a slap-up dinner or, better still, a weekend break at their expense.
  • pollyanna_26pollyanna_26 Forumite
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    I find these "Dilemma" threads very odd. Brief outline of a problem. Without feedback from those with a problem they go nowhere.

    This one sounds really odd. With such extensive refurbishment taking place surely rented temporary housing would be sought. There possibly was room to stay in their home anyway. I don't know any tradesmen working 24 hours a day 7 days a week on site.

    They will have their own utility bills to meet unless the builders are using stone age tools. Electricity, Water , Mortgage if payable. Home and contents insurance. Council Tax etc. We'll never know but I wonder where their furniture and carpets are.
    polly
    It is better to light a single candle than to curse the darkness.
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