Inherited house & family

Sorcerer2018

Another point, is as half owner of the house, you are also responsible for half of the upkeep of the house, what if the roof needs repairing, council tax, insurance etc. If you allow the situation to continue you could also be left in a difficult position. It is a difficulty situation, but at some point as executer you must end it. Even if it means selling the house and calling the bailiffs out to throw them out, but it has to be done correctly, and likely your family will hate you forever, everything you have done nothing but but follow the law. I know how it feels, I have been in a similar situation and everybody considers you to be mean, but as executer you have a job to do. Perhaps you could bring in a lodger to live in your 50% of the house, who pays rent to you?

Manxman_in_exile

Not disagreeing with anything suggested by anyone else so far, but if your family are better off or generally more wealthy than you, and they all think it's a good idea for your sister to live there rent free and you get nothing out of your share of the house, why don't you suggest that they give your sister the necessary financial support to enable her to buy out your half?  Or suggest they buy your half and give it to your sister*.  They seem very generous with your finances so far, so why not give them the opportunity to be equally generous with their own?

Point out to them that the current situation is wholly unacceptable and that you need to realise your share of the house.  If they can't - or won't - help her to buy you out, then tell them you'll have no choice but to go down the legal route.  (Make sure you get advice from the house selling board as suggested above and speak to a solicitor before delivering this ultimatum.  You don't want to threaten some sort of legal action that you can't follow up on - otherwise they'll know for sure you are a soft touch and will twist you round their little fingers... )

If you end up taking the "nuclear" option, make sure your sister understands that you are only doing so because the rest of the family aren't willing to help her.

This will most likely destroy family relationships but it sounds to me like it may not be a great loss.  But if that is important to you, think carefully how you proceed.

* If you are able to persuade the rest of your family to buy your half out for your sister, make sure it is evidenced in a properly worded legal agreement.  Get a solicitor to advise.

Jinnydr21

Manxman_in_exile said:

Not disagreeing with anything suggested by anyone else so far, but if your family are better off or generally more wealthy than you, and they all think it's a good idea for your sister to live there rent free and you get nothing out of your share of the house, why don't you suggest that they give your sister the necessary financial support to enable her to buy out your half?  Or suggest they buy your half and give it to your sister*.  They seem very generous with your finances so far, so why not give them the opportunity to be equally generous with their own?

Point out to them that the current situation is wholly unacceptable and that you need to realise your share of the house.  If they can't - or won't - help her to buy you out, then tell them you'll have no choice but to go down the legal route.  (Make sure you get advice from the house selling board as suggested above and speak to a solicitor before delivering this ultimatum.  You don't want to threaten some sort of legal action that you can't follow up on - otherwise they'll know for sure you are a soft touch and will twist you round their little fingers... )

If you end up taking the "nuclear" option, make sure your sister understands that you are only doing so because the rest of the family aren't willing to help her.

This will most likely destroy family relationships but it sounds to me like it may not be a great loss.  But if that is important to you, think carefully how you proceed.

* If you are able to persuade the rest of your family to buy your half out for your sister, make sure it is evidenced in a properly worded legal agreement.  Get a solicitor to advise.

This was something that was mentioned last year actually. Due to the fact that my father is now interested in it. I daresay it wouldn't have been suggested solely for the purposes of resolving the issue. That was  6 months ago and when I have tried to follow up I don’t get any response to my messages. So I can only assume it was another delaying technique to buy her more time there.

Unfortunately it has gotten to the point where legal looks to be the only option I have. I am honestly like a broken record at this point when I say it’s not fair and that I should have access to my inheritance. I speak and the voice of Charlie Brown’s teacher comes out! I am on tenterhooks waiting for appointment with solicitor. 

Annie_Elizabeth

Another thing to point out to your family is that we are living in precarious economic times. You and your partner have been lucky so far in that you have both managed to keep in work, but there is no guarantee of this in the future. Who could have predicted Covid for example? You could easily end up losing your rented property and becoming homeless. Your local council would be under no legal duty to provide you with accommodation, as you and your partner are young adults. Unlike your sister, who would be entitled to rehousing, because she has children. 

I used to work in the housing field, and my impression is that the legal process of actually getting your sister out the house is likely to take a long while, possibly years, so a lot might change during that time. You and your partner might decide to have children, for example. Your sister’s children will be old enough for school in a few years, so there will be nothing to stop her getting a job. 

The only reason this situation arose in the first place was because your sister happened to be living in the house when your mother died. Supposing, say, you had been living there and not your sister, would they have tried to insist that you must move out so that she could move in? 
Basically, the family’s displeasure is the price you have to resign yourself to pay to obtain your inheritance. They will get over it. 

Bye the way, who is paying the house insurance? You really do need to make sure this is paid. Even if, annoyingly, you have to pay for it yourself. 

Mickey666

Annie_Elizabeth said:

Another thing to point out to your family is that we are living in precarious economic times. You and your partner have been lucky so far in that you have both managed to keep in work, but there is no guarantee of this in the future. Who could have predicted Covid for example? You could easily end up losing your rented property and becoming homeless. Your local council would be under no legal duty to provide you with accommodation, as you and your partner are young adults. Unlike your sister, who would be entitled to rehousing, because she has children. 

I used to work in the housing field, and my impression is that the legal process of actually getting your sister out the house is likely to take a long while, possibly years, so a lot might change during that time. You and your partner might decide to have children, for example. Your sister’s children will be old enough for school in a few years, so there will be nothing to stop her getting a job. 

The only reason this situation arose in the first place was because your sister happened to be living in the house when your mother died. Supposing, say, you had been living there and not your sister, would they have tried to insist that you must move out so that she could move in? 
Basically, the family’s displeasure is the price you have to resign yourself to pay to obtain your inheritance. They will get over it. 

Bye the way, who is paying the house insurance? You really do need to make sure this is paid. Even if, annoyingly, you have to pay for it yourself. 

As the house is still in the estate then effectively ALL the beneficiaries are going to be paying for insurance eventually as it will be coming out of the estate finances.

But yes, the executor has a legal duty of care to protect the estate's assets as far as reasonably possible, which must surely include insurance, so in practice it is the OP's responsibility as executor to ensure the property is insured.

This is just another example of how the family are putting the OP in a very difficult position.  I hope their solicitor meeting goes well because it's about the only way I can see that the OP can ensure that the required actions are taken to get things finally sorted out.  Even though it's not going to be pretty

Jinnydr21

So I had consultation with solicitor and what was said was pretty much verbatim to what  you guys were already wise enough to know. There was a legal obligation for the  administrator, an oath was taken, that the deceased’s estates would be divided between beneficiaries and this has failed to happen etc etc etc. The fact that the administrator and one of the beneficiaries are the same person is irrelevant. The point that RAS made. 

Again as people have mentioned, she can try to claim dependency but that had a time limit which expired a long time ago. 

They can start the  process by issuing a letter to the property to basically outline that the house needs to be sold, why this needs to happen and a date to vacate etc.

I’m hoping she will agree to this because if you are being asked to leave a house where are you already living overcrowded and walking away with a 50% share that would seem a great deal to me! 

Of course my family will be mortified about the fact that I have resorted to legal and I will probably get the 2021 remixed version of “kicking her and children out on the street”.  But this situation needs to be resolved and if that needs to be by a professional so be it.

Mickey666

Thanks for the update.  I personally think you've made the right decision to 'go legal' and it's what I would have done.
There comes a point where a dispassionate third party is needed to cut through 'family squabbles' to the core legal issues.  I'm sure it wasn't easy for you and you'll no doubt get come flack but it's really the only way if the family can't come to a fair agreement among themselves.
The sad fact is that everyone will lose out now because there will be legal fees to be paid by the estate so there will be a little less to distribute to the beneficiaries.
Good luck with it all and don't beat yourself up - you've been effectively forced into appointing a solicitor to sort this all out.  I only hope everyone sees sense and don't try to drag things out.  Perhaps if they understand that any delaying tactics will simply increase the legal costs and therefore decrease their eventual inheritance then they'll cooperate towards a speedy resolution.

Jinnydr21

Mickey666 said:

Thanks for the update.  I personally think you've made the right decision to 'go legal' and it's what I would have done.
There comes a point where a dispassionate third party is needed to cut through 'family squabbles' to the core legal issues.  I'm sure it wasn't easy for you and you'll no doubt get come flack but it's really the only way if the family can't come to a fair agreement among themselves.
The sad fact is that everyone will lose out now because there will be legal fees to be paid by the estate so there will be a little less to distribute to the beneficiaries.
Good luck with it all and don't beat yourself up - you've been effectively forced into appointing a solicitor to sort this all out.  I only hope everyone sees sense and don't try to drag things out.  Perhaps if they understand that any delaying tactics will simply increase the legal costs and therefore decrease their eventual inheritance then they'll cooperate towards a speedy resolution.

Exactly. For anyone in a similar situation, I should have done this years ago. At the time of my mother’s death actually. This is what needs to be weighed up when considering to take on the probate yourself. I was very naive in thinking it was purely about completing the paperwork because it’s more about dealing with opinions, feelings and emotions AFTER the death and not just at it. I would never have saw this coming because we were very close and had a great relationship at the time.

Thank you so much, yes hopefully it will not drag on too much now and even if she cannot realise this herself I hope someone in my family can explain to her that we will be left with nothing if she digs her heels in.

xylophone

You have now involved a solicitor but even had you done so at the time, the solicitor would have  been looking to you and your sibling to resolve the matter amicably between yourselves?
Have a look at this thread.

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6232470/possible-dispute-over-jointly-inherited-house/p1

The OP of the above is one of two siblings.

The OP left home and bought a property long ago and is settled with job and family.

 The brother never married, stayed in the family home and lost his long term (though low paid) job a couple of years ago.

Their surviving parent (father) recently died.

The surviving executor of their father's will (which left the estate (including the house) to be divided equally between the  siblings) is elderly, doesn't want to be involved and has appointed a solicitor to deal with the whole business. 

The solicitor

sent an email to us both saying that to administer the Estate according to the Will, the property would need to be sold and the sale proceeds split between us, and that before they take instructions from us to deal with the estate we need to agree whether the house is to be sold or transferred into our name. It also mentioned that if we can't decide we may wish to take independent legal advice.

And round and round we go.....

Jinnydr21

xylophone said:

You have now involved a solicitor but even had you done so at the time, the solicitor would have  been looking to you and your sibling to resolve the matter amicably between yourselves?
Have a look at this thread.

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6232470/possible-dispute-over-jointly-inherited-house/p1

The OP of the above is one of two siblings.

The OP left home and bought a property long ago and is settled with job and family.

 The brother never married, stayed in the family home and lost his long term (though low paid) job a couple of years ago.

Their surviving parent (father) recently died.

The surviving executor of their father's will (which left the estate (including the house) to be divided equally between the  siblings) is elderly, doesn't want to be involved and has appointed a solicitor to deal with the whole business. 

The solicitor

sent an email to us both saying that to administer the Estate according to the Will, the property would need to be sold and the sale proceeds split between us, and that before they take instructions from us to deal with the estate we need to agree whether the house is to be sold or transferred into our name. It also mentioned that if we can't decide we may wish to take independent legal advice.

And round and round we go.....

I am completely new to all this so I’m sure that you are right that at the time the solicitor would probably expected things to be agreed amicably. At that time the situation and our relationship was different so with their suggestions we may well have been able to agreed on the best course of action.

Is it different with rules of intestacy? For example if we were named in a will to inherit the house then the onus would be on it to make some decisions regarding what to do with it. Whereas if it’s intestate they are going purely off the law in regards to that as, in the estate needs to be divided between us, and the only way to do that would be to sell it?