Now or never

Its_time

It's just all pants!  I'm totally ashamed and have no idea how it happened, or more likely I just shoved my head in the sand and pretended it all did not matter.
Basically we have two credit cards totaling about 14000, a car loan of about 13500, overdraft rattles along anywhere between 1800 od and being in credit,   I overpay constantly but get nowhere.
I absolutely hate our main job so we need to find a replacement for that.  I am hoping that my 2nd job can step up and fill the gap, DH has also said anything he earns from his 2nd job can go as a replacement for the main job we both want to give up.
Our main job brings in about 2400 a month, DH earns on top about £1000 so if I could make £1000 a month we would be on a winner after we have cleared the debt which costs us £900 a month after overpaying.  Anyway its going to be a long haul but we may have finally had our proper light bulb moment.  We want to retire without debt and want a more peaceful life until then.  I was dithering about coming back and posting to keep me accountable and supported on the journey but felt so guilty about the mess were in  I think I will tcome back though.

WinterWarrior

Absolutely don’t feel guilty. This is your journey. We are none of us perfect…that’s why we are here!
do you have a new plan in place for your payments. The only thing I would say (and I’m definitely no expert) is that the overdraft will be costing so much more than everything else, so might be worth concentrating on that and then removing the option? 

Four_Seasons

don't beat yourself up, I should imagine a fair few of us have done exactly the same at one time or another.  I will be following your debt free journey and cheering you on x

Its_time

Thanks guys 
I do kind of have a plan, i've just checked exact figures, i've had a bit of a shock to be honest I checked the interest rates the loan calling it No. 1 is on 2.9% and is £14,861.00, the biggest credit card No 2 is on 16.9%, and is £10480.76 the other card No 3 is on 24.9% and is at £2728.10 @WinterWarrior you are so right the overdraft  No 4 is on 33.5%!!!!! with £472.06 currently overdrawn. Wow!  Why did that never matter to me?  Total debt is £28,541.92
We thought No. 3 was the highest interest rate so paid off £625.60 earlier this week and planned to sort that one out first but earlier today I thought I might just check the overdraft No 4 rates and nearly fell over!  So now the plan has changed slightly and I will try my best to stay out of the overdraft and leave a buffer in the account.  I have a payment from my 2nd job due next weekend, should have been this weekend but I have been miserable all week so it has affected my work, burying my head in the sand again! so next weekend I should get paid and that is £1249.00, I am going to take whatever I need from that to clear the overdraft and leave some spare in the account and put the rest towards No. 3 which is the next highest and keep on paying in reverse order so No. 4- No. 1.  I also have another set of work almost finished which should make me around £600 after all the fees are taken out as I sell that online.  
I am really grateful to DH for his attitude to this, he said he doesn't want me to be unhappy and he can see I am practically going mad over it, he said he can see it's not just the debt it is also the job we both have, so he has made a decision to give all his money he earns each month from his 2nd job to the household account forever more, we have agreed to try and live on a lot less income but live happier and more simply with both of us just keeping our 2nd jobs.   When he first told me I slept well that night but the enormity of the journey we are on is a huge weight to bear and now I am over the initial happy feeling it is all a bit daunting.  
I am hoping we can pay £2100.00 each month to the debt which is approximately overpaying by about £1500 each month.
If all goes well maybe in a years time it will be gone and we can give up our main job.
Thanks for the messages of support it's very much appreciated.

enthusiasticsaver

Sorry you are struggling with getting to grips with the debt.  Have you done an soa (statement of account) so you and your DH can do a proper budget and maybe sort out savings pots for things like the puppy, car, house expenses etc and budget for gifts and food etc etc.  

Money worries cause most of us an incredible amount of stress so it is difficult to think of other things like dieting, work problems etc.  Getting a plan sorted and an objective (debt cleared so you can give up job you hate) will help motivate you. 

The important thing is  to have a plan you can stick to rather than go hell for leather to overpay the debt and then rebel and spend like there is no tomorrow. Not saying that is what you have done but it is a common occurrence on the diaries. Well done for coming back though and owning it. 

Its_time

@enthusiasticsaver thank you for your suggestion.  It is clearly the route we should take, but it feels a bit scary, I think it has identified exactly what our issues are, well mine really because DH has nothing to do with the money, it is me, facing up to the figures and sticking to it is where I fail, thank you 

Its_time

I've done an SOA, it tells me that I have £1447. left each month to overpay or do whatever I want with, obviously I want to pay it off the debt.  I haven't taken into the account the horses or our puppy but I also haven't taken into account my earnings from my 2nd job which I know will cover both of those things.  To be honest seeing the SOA I feel even more uncomfortable and but I think I need to feel this way to sort it out and stop hiding.  Realistically DH has only just decided that we need to use all our money from all jobs to clear the debt rather than just keep surfing the debt with our main job getting nowhere, I told him what was happening and he had the sense to realise that it can't keep going on like that.  
One thing I am really struggling with is patience, I want to pay all the debt now and don't want to put money aside for an emergency fund, I am really, really struggling with this one.  I think this is another of my downfalls.  
To be honest the money is a mess, I just use the credit cards to fund my business, buying my stock etc and then just pay everything I earn back off it, but also use it to buy whatever I want in the meantime.  I actually hate not having money but can't seem to do anything about it!  Everything is such a muddle.

WinterWarrior

Do you watch/read anything from Dave Ramsey? He’s a bit goddy and American, but if you can get past that he talks a lot of sense that translates well to U.K. finances 😬. He talks a lot about the emergency fund and that’s what made sense to me. If an emergency happens you use it and then build it back up before overpaying again. This means you never go backwards by adding to your debts. I also enjoy seeing his followers pay off their mortgages, although how they manage in such short times is mind boggling!

Its_time

I will have a look, it's definitely my mindset that is ruining all this.  I feel like I just want the debt gone now, today, right this minute and saving for an emergency fund is slowing that down, it's ridiculous I know, but I suppose it is part of facing up to the mess.  I need to set good habits for the future once the debt is gone otherwise I will be back to square one, it's the same with my dieting, yo yo, yo yo, yo yo, I will read some Dave Ramsey, thank you

enthusiasticsaver

Ideally you should not be using credit cards to buy stock for your business.  Do you not keep separate accounts for the business and pay yourself a salay?  I know when you are self employed it is sometimes difficult to set a definite salary but if you do not separate your personal and business income and expenditure this can lead to all sorts of problems.  Are you putting money aside to cover tax? 

Throwing everything at the debt but not saving for emergencies is counter productive especially if you have expensive pets like horses and dogs.  It is one step forward and three back and you are then in danger of not making any progress.  Ideally over time you need to get away from using cards altogether and setting a realistic debt reduction plan.  If you have almost £1500 spare income then making a  plan to reduce and pay the debt off is certainly possible but not while you sabotage yourself by continuing to put expenditure on cards and not saving for expected expenditure or emergencies. No doubt the debt has increased partly because of your approach to paying it off and also erratic income. You will need to be patient as there is no quick fix to paying off debt not only because you cannot quickly raise £28k to repay it but also because bad spending and budgeting habits take time to fix. You might feel saving for emergencies is slowing you down as you would rather put it towards debt but if you repay £1400 of debt but then run out of money and spend on the cards again or put an unexpected bill on the cards you will get demotivated as no or little debt reduction will take place.  Far better to say you have £1400 spare so save £200 towards emergencies and £200 to a pets savings account to cover vet bills etc and overpay by £1k and the debt will be gone in just over 2 years.  That only works if you stop spending on the cards which I strongly recommend you do to get yourself out of the mentality that the cards are available money when you run out.