End of Life in Care Home

edited 26 October 2020 at 10:53AM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
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annie501annie501 Forumite
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edited 26 October 2020 at 10:53AM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
Hi, can anyone advise me please, we have been told by Doctor my Dad is now in end of life care in a Care Home (not because of corona) but we are 4 siblings and have been told only 2 people from same household can enter the Home to see him. They are in High category at moment. How on earth do we choose which siblings are allowed to say goodbye? 
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  • JJ_EganJJ_Egan Forumite
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    A petition please link .
  • eddddyeddddy Forumite
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    It's very much a 'second best' option, but depending on your Dad's condition - could a technology solution help?

    For example, could some family members chat with your Dad via video sessions on an iPad (so that they can see each other and chat with each other)?

    You could even have a Zoom session (or similar) where lots of family members join in the video session at the same time - but that might overwhelm your Dad a bit.
  • fred246fred246 Forumite
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    All go in and ask them to point to the two allowed in. Ask them to make the decision so you won't have any arguments in the future. They will find it too difficult and let you all in.
  • montyrebelmontyrebel Forumite
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    2 oldest children surely imo
    mortui non mordent
  • edited 25 October 2020 at 10:33AM
    ToxicWombleToxicWomble Forumite
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    edited 25 October 2020 at 10:33AM
    2 from the same household may actually only mean 1 can visit if all 4 lived in their own separate households.
  • gizmo111gizmo111 Forumite
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    Is this 2 at a time, or only 2 named people?
    Local hospital here is 1 person per day but for end of life they agreed to split the day so 2 people could visit separately. 

    Mama read so much about the dangers of drinking alcohol and eating chocolate that she immediately gave up reading.
  • 74jax74jax Forumite
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    fred246 said:
    All go in and ask them to point to the two allowed in. Ask them to make the decision so you won't have any arguments in the future. They will find it too difficult and let you all in.
    Whilst I understand that the decision of who gets to go in, is then taken from you, I highly doubt the Care Home would find it too difficult and just allow all in. 
    You don't all need to go (remember they need to keep safe and have a full care home of people to protect), you could just ask them to decide for you.  I doubt they would, but if you don't mind it being chosen randomly then it's an option.  
    I'd still go with opting for the oldest or one who hasn't seen Dad in the longest and face timing.  
    Forty and fabulous, well that's what my cards say....
  • AskAskAskAsk Forumite
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    are you sure this is not 2 from the same house hold at any time?  so 2 could go in and then out, then the other 2 go in?

    but otherwise the 2 that goes in have a tablet and you all can speak via video link.
  • edited 26 October 2020 at 12:32PM
    JamoLewJamoLew Forumite
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    edited 26 October 2020 at 12:32PM
    Its already been mentioned though that all 4 may actually belong to 4 different households.
    Unless the OP returns to clarify, we are just guessing
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