When should my child view the house we are buying?

lincroft1710

As a 13 yr old I remember the first time I viewed the house my parents bought - when we moved in!

NinjaTune

If your sale falls through would she be very upset, having seen the house and seeing it as being her 'new home'?  I'd agree that the pre-exchange visit would be the time to show her if you feel she needs to see it prior to moving in.

We moved when I was 7 and, apparently, I burst into tears when I saw my bedroom and refused to sleep in it.  I don't remember that, probably too traumatised to retain the memory.  To be fair I'm told it had alternate lime green and bright orange walls - even for the 70's that was fairly whacky.  I'm also told that my Dad painted my bedroom the day after we moved in and I slept in with my parents until it was done.

scottiescott

Jeepers, have times changed so much.
I just got told firstly, we're looking to move, then we're off to look at a property and finally we've bought it.
Never queried it and just accepted thats what was happening.
Never thought anything of it.

badger09

Mickey666 said:

Catsacor said:

I can truthfully say that, as kids, we were never asked opinions on our parents life choices - do you consult yours regularly, this idea is not one i've ever heard of.

I agree.  I once went to school from one house and went home to another when my parents moved.  At least they told me the new address  

LOL I can identify with that!

I left home for uni in 1968 and at the same time, my parents bought their first home in their early 50s (thanks to inheriting enough for deposit from grandad). Sadly, my mum had her 1st stroke around the same time, so my first visit 'home' (it never was) was bittersweet.

I wasn't, and didn't expect to be, consulted.

gingerlex

Just to clarify, the house I grew up in was the only house I knew until my husband and I bought where we live now. I don't know what other parents did or do! 

No she isn't getting a say in where we live, I just want to try and make it as straight forward as possible for her to settle in; hence asking for opinions. She is a funny little thing, some change can really distress her and other times she is go with the flow, hence not being so sure. I didn't really know if it was a done thing or not. Cheers for the input ☺️

nora_nora

gingerlex said:

Just to clarify, the house I grew up in was the only house I knew until my husband and I bought where we live now. I don't know what other parents did or do! 

No she isn't getting a say in where we live, I just want to try and make it as straight forward as possible for her to settle in; hence asking for opinions. She is a funny little thing, some change can really distress her and other times she is go with the flow, hence not being so sure. I didn't really know if it was a done thing or not. Cheers for the input ☺️

I'd say stop complicating things by putting things in her head that she's too young to understand. She's going to view the house when you move in anyway so why risk causing her anxiety if she finds change so distressing by trying to have adult conversations with her about how she's moving to a new house? Let her be a 4 year old for goodness sake. She wont even notice the difference once you've been there a fortnight, then you'll be able to worry about how you're going to sit her down to tell her she's going to be at playgroup by herself soon and wont see you for a couple of hours a day lol

theoretica

My family moved when I was 3 1/2 and I think I only saw the house when we moved in, but it was a fairly long distance move.  I did get to 'help' peel wall paper and to draw on the walls before the paper came off, I remember that!

Madmel

Ours were 7 & 5 when we moved.  I viewed the new house first on a Thursday morning, then DH and the DC came for a 2nd viewing on the Saturday. We put the offer in on Monday which was accepted and started the ball rolling.  There was a long time between exchange & completion, which both parties were happy about.  The vendors invited us to a garden party during that period to meet the neighbours.  We went back the following week so the DC could choose which bedroom they wanted.  The move actually happened on the final day of the school summer holidays.  We didn't have anyone to leave the DC with so they just rolled with it and were actually quite helpful.

Because we had exchanged contracts, we talked about the new house and all the things they would be able to do there long before we moved.  I don't remember either of them having any issues; in fact they thought it was a massive adventure.  The "new" house did have quite a lot to excite them; now they are adults and have to help maintain it, the allure has gone!

FtbDreaming

I don’t remember bringing the kids to view this house before I moved in. I’d just let her see it on the day you move in. As others have said get her minded or send her to school and when she comes home have a little space set up for her whether it’s a bedroom or a corner kit with her stuff as a little surprise 

Apintplease

When I was four we moved as a family.

I got to see the house after nursery, mum and dad had moved in by then. Got to sleep in my old bed in a new room and that was about it. Don't think we kids had a clue we were going to wake in one house and go to bed in another