Gambling Recovery and COVID job loss

lixhul

Legs21 said:

What’s the difference between food and shopping?

Shopping is like house stuff and non food buys. I've slashed my budget so £400 variable spend basically everything else is fixed.

lixhul

Worst news. The Amazon FBA project I have needs more money, like £1500. Literally threw that away last night. I have about £2K left to my name. I get paid on 28th about £1500. 

I'm thinking if I do have to pay something unforseen like this, I will have to take it from the credit card repayment budget which I've set to £800 because I just need to get rid of it, it's causing me so many problems mentally.

I will shop at Aldi which isn't far from me and spend like £20 a week. I am no longer with my girlfriend so I don't need to be lazy with takeaway and treats.

I have spoken to my daughter's mother and she won't help. She is a ****. She stole so much money from me in the past, I asked for one month off and she can't do it.

I just can't believe I did it. I always do it on the weekend. I've had a very hard time lately, I split from my girlfriend, gambled heavily, overspent, and I am so fearful I'll lose everything.

If it gets to the melting point I'll have to sell my car. I've got a few things I can sell on eBay to raise a few hundred. I am getting a refund from student finance for a few hundred next month too, and my old energy company owes me £100. That's about £500 but it's nothing.

Matched betting I need to do no matter what until at least my cards are paid off. I am no way near into it as I used to. I used to earn over £60K a year doing this for 3 years. I had over £100K in my bank 2 years ago, now I have about £2K. It's embarassing and I dont know how to handle such a fall.

I just had it in my mind my gambling would go for me yesterday and I'd make ££££ but I ended up losing £2K in 5 minutes, 2 Roulette spins of £1K each on a colour. It's disgusting. That's 50% of my cash gone in 5 minutes.

I am praying I can stick to the snowball approach. £800 a month is a lot but the budget is there if I can stick to it and for 1 year be very careful. No more Maccies coffees, no more drinks, no more lazy takeaways, just frozen food. If I remove the debt I think i'd be in a better place if I survive it.

lixhul

I am in work and I am living like an idiot. Is there no government help or anything I can get.

SweetPeaGirl

Hi Lixhul, it sounds like you will need to address the gambling issue before you'll be able to make lasting progress financially. Have you considered Gamblers Anonymous? I know someone who went to meetings and turned their life around that way. GA are resuming physical meetings in some places too.

There's some other advice from the NHS too if you google 'help for problem gambling NHS'.

A good first step could be to talk to your GP - there are long waits for CBT, but lots of places are also doing self-serve online courses that might help you make a start in the right direction.

(I would post links, but I'm not allowed yet as I'm a new member!)

WinterWarrior

Hi @lixhul, you seem quite adamant you don’t need gambling help. The only alternative I can think is to park £1k somewhere very safe as your emergency fund and use the remaining £1k to pay off your lowest card and the remaining against the next card, then snowball your debts as planned. That way the temptation is gone. 

Then avoid matched betting or anything tempting and work on paying everything slowly but surely. Maybe consider a DMP to help you do this?
it might be worth getting some independent advice from the CAB or similar?

Recovery2021

Honestly @lixhul please seek some sort of help for the gambling before worrying about the finances. 

I know how hard it is to seek help and admit the problem (I've still probably not sought enough help myself) but signing up for Gamstop on 31st dec was the best thing I have ever done. I haven't placed a bet this year and feel confident I don't have to worry about making a mistake which can sometimes just be a brief 5 minute mistake that costs a fortune as you know. 

I have been in your situation, trying the matched betting, assuming one win will cure it all etc and not trying to cut off all ties with it so you don't have that option but ultimatley having that option is just the worst thing there is. I have wasted so much money down the years and a part of me does still feel "sad" (not sure that is the word) that I can't have that big win to win all the money back I have lost. But that is nothing in comparison to the relief I feel not worrying about getting further into debt etc. 

Please sign up for gamstop. My gambling addiction probably lasted 11 years (on/off) but I was first advised to use gamstop about 5 years ago but like you just avoided it and avoided it so maybe prolonged the addiction/losses longer than necessary. You won't regret it and if you have any queries please ask. 

GeordieGeorge

lixhul said:

I am in work and I am living like an idiot. Is there no government help or anything I can get.

People have told you to use Gamstop; what’s the reason for you not doing it?

I agree with others that you need to stop the matched betting; it’s keeping you involved with bookmakers which is one of the reasons you are losing so much money. Pretending that you can segregate this from the wider gambling issue is just not helping.

You can, with help, find a way through this, but at the moment you’re ignoring the good advice that people are taking the time to post.