Young couple saving for a house while renting privetly and paying off a loan

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edited 7 September 2020 at 4:23PM in Debt free diaries

I'm not sure if I'm posting in the right forum or if I should be posting at all as I'm from the Republic of Ireland and understandably a lot of the forms here are UK based but admittedly I love reading the diaries I have come across and it has inspired me to write my own diaries.

Currency wise, my layout would be different but I hope I am on the same page when it comes to finances and budgeting and overal just life in general.

Hello. Its lovely to meet you all. 

I currently live with my partner who has a young child (we've known each other for 15 plus years, we are both 28 now). To say the relationship was hot and cold during those years is an understatement. We've been in other relationships throughout the years but always lead back towards each other. I won't say I believe in soul mates but my partner has always been my one true love and granted we've loved and cried over others, Ive always said he was the one I've wanted to build a life with. Jesus it's never been easy. Until less than 2 years ago. 

My partner was in a relationship with the mother of his child and unfortunately, as hard as they had tried, it couldn't work anymore. Most would say they had a child to salvage the relationship, maybe, but again, I wasn't there so I can't comment on the ups and downs. But they both love the little one dearly and do all they can fiancially, emotionally and mentally to put the little ones needs first. Their relationship now is friendly and mutual. 

Around the time my partner and his child's mother had split up, I had recently left a turbulent relationship. It was an absolute disaster and it knocked me for six. Honestly, it put me off being in a relationship at all. Fiancially that relationship broke me. My partner and I had both walked away from previous relationships and within a month of being "on our own", my partner rang me and blurted out that he wasn't going to beat around the bush anymore and that we are getting old to be playing around with feelings and life is too short, basically. 

So here we are 2 years later and I can't say it's been an easy two years, believe me but we are both desperate to buy our own house, settle down, get married (we are engaged now) add a sibling for the little one and over just live life. 

The economy and housing crisis in Ireland is beyond atrocious but that's a story for a different forum, right now what's relevant is, the rent we are paying is painstakingly high and although it's better than most, we are trying to save for a deposit on our first (and forevever home) also living with my partners father (which I will admit can be difficult at the best of times) 

While juggling my partner supporting his child which he never misses a payment, as well as spoiling the little one, there is bills, food shopping and of course, a debt that my partner has racked up due to lack of money because of a previous job that wasn't paying him (he was with an agency who basically decided when they fancied paying him, thankfully he gained enough experience to apply for the job he's in now and is permanent and receives a fortnightly wage!) 
Thankfully it's only one loan we've got now as I have paid off my own car loan (July 2020). I had a 5 year car loan which I've managed to pay off in 3 years thanks to my scrimping and saving but now, I'm struggling to get back on the savings wagon and I feel like I'm going nowhere. 

We both work full time. Me being Mon-Fri and my partners days are mixed around but he works full time hours (38 hours which is classed as full time in Ireland), combined we earn a decent figure each month. 

I could come out with over €2,000 a month (I get paid weekly but to break it down also I do overtime so sometimes it could be €2,120 a month) and my partner gets paid fortnightly but would roughly be the same amount, a little bit more as he does more overtime than I would. 

Seeing as the house we live in, myself, partner and his father split the rent between us which helps but sometimes it infuriates me how his father never bought himself a house especially as he has money to buy a house and is willing to pay someone else's mortage. It's encourage me and partner to buy our own house seeing as we don't want to be in our 70s and renting with the possiblity of being told to move one day, plus renting a home isn't the same as owning a home. You can't really do it up. If there's problems (and believe me there's been enough house problems) the landlord either doesn't care or doesn't want to fix anything so we are left to fend for ourselves. 

There's more trails and tribulations to renting than buying. 

This brings me to the budgeting, saving and all round general life's on goings. 

We've also got a dog whom we both adore and she's the absolute love of our lives, coming second to my partners little one.
We are trully thankful for a roof over our heads and a steady job (I have been working in the same company for 7 plus years with no intentions of leaving and my partner is in his company 2 plus years with no intentions of leaving so we are set there)

At the minute, I feel things are in limbo as I'm trying to watch what I spend my money on but realising that buy the weekend, I've no money. As of right now I have €2.90 in my bank account and I was paid on Thursday, it's now Saturday night. 

We've got separate savings accounts. 
I've my own "house deposit savings account" that I put a set weekly amount into. I've also got a "Rainy days account" that I also put a set weekly amount into and a "car tax and insurance account" that I put a set weekly amount into. I pay my tax and insurance yearly which makes a huge difference to paying off monthly.

By the end of that I've money left out for my food shopping which I always plan out and make sure that I buy enough to batch cook my lunches and dinner for the week so I'm not spending money during the week. I have the same breakfast, porridge or whetaix, with fruits every morning. I think I've become more savvy the last couple of months in terms of food shopping (also thank god for the Lidl plus app!)

My partner does his own food shopping as he's a gym buff and eats the house and home so he needs to stock up on his meats and so forth. It works out cheaper when we do our own shopping as it means I can stick to one shop and I know what exactly I'm spending my money on whereas he has to go to a couple of different shops and hopes certain deals are on but again, he budgets his food shopping and aims for around the same prices range.

Overal my bank account doesn't have many direct debits that come out of it so I'm lucky in a way than I have no major out goings.

€12.99 phone bill (which I've managed to reduced as I used to pay €20 a month) 

€44.52 for my health insurance (I need to have as I have a fear of something happening and then I can't afford to pay and luckly if I visit my GP I get 50% back) 

€200 goes into my deposit savings 

€50 goes into my Rainy day funds 
€20 goes into my car tax and insurance account.

 €120 a week for rent which I give to my partners father for my share of the rent. 

His however, my eyes water to the taught of knowing how messy his account is. His gym membership. Toll membership and god knows what else. Including child maintenance, his own car tax and insurance and savings. I dread to see how messy his account actually is. 

As of right now, we are both saving but feel like it's going nowhere. 

However I made a deal with him. Seeing as I paid my car loan, he has also seen how quick I managed to save by watching what I was spending money on, I told him that if he continues to save the way I have and I continue to save then by December if he matches my savings then I will help him pay off his loan and that way by Xmas we are both loan free and can start the new year with a completly new and fresh savings slate with no intentions of dipping onto as we've no reasons too. I think this has spurred him on a little bit and he's realised that being loan free, the weight off my shoulders is beyond exciting and he knows the possibly of recieving a mortage with no loans on our backs gives us a higher chance of receiving a decent amount and more opportunities to afford anywhere, possibly outside of Dublin as it's quieter and cheaper. 

I had planned in June that I would have close to 10k by December but the most I'm looking at now is 7k which is not bad but nowhere near where I wanted to be (due to paying off my loan and we've had to purchased a new bed base and mattress as our old bed was possibly older than us) My partner has only 1k as he had to buy a car recently as we were using one car and it just wasn't doable with our shifts in work and also picking up and dropping the little one off to their mammies house which led my car to eventually tell me that it was too small to be going long distances. Fiancially it's worked out a lot easier as I've to pay petrol every 2 weeks whereas before, we were going in at least once a week to top up on petrol which was double the amount that I pay now. Its worked out a lot better for us. 
Buying the car has put a huge dent in my partners savings but he's building it back up, slowly but surely. 

Now Xmas is around the corner.....

My rainy day funds will get a dip and I'm still with the intentions of not dipping into my deposit savings if push comes to shove. 

So with this, I hope this diary will help motivate me and also my partner and help maybe track where we could change or what we are doing wrong. 

Also.... Thank you if you read this far as I understand this has been a lengthy post. 


  • To start off my diary properly.... 

    I finished work yesterday (Friday 5th) at 2.30pm and done my weekly food shop as I do every Friday after work. I've been doing this habit since I returned to work after lockdown and I love it. Thanks to the lidl plus app I can get some decent discounts and around this time the lidl store isn't empty so it has all I need. I returned home and changed my sheets, cleaned the house and made OHs meals for work tomorrow so I had the evening to relax and destress in which I passed out at 8pm and I woke at 7am Saturday morning (6th). My hours in work are 6am until 2.30pm so it's safe to say by Friday evenings I'm fit to sleep for a week. 

     Saturday morning I batched cooked my dinner for the week (red lentil and chickpea stew) it looked delishs online so I bought the recipes in lidl (total amount came to €30.50 which included the 50c off my shopping and €1 off an item I picked up to go towards my lunch) . I baked 4 wholemeal buns (I had plenty of wholemeal flour left over from when I bought them during lockdown so I taught I would use it) to go with my stew which I'm dying to tuck into on Monday. I had booked to get my nails refilled last month as I do every month which I treat myself to as I never buy clothes etc for myself so I like to "splurge" on my nails and for the rest of the month I don't buy anything else. 
    I done another quick clean around and done two loads of washing in the morning and thankfully the weather wasn't rubbish until the evening so clothes we washed and dried by the afternoon. It's the little things.

    I spent the afternoon relaxing with my dog and watching Black Books reruns on Netflix. Bit of a busy morning, afternoonish and chill evening. OH came home and chatted about his day in work and the gym and he's now out cold. 

    I spent €35 on my nails today. It left a dent in my wages and I've to make €2.90 last me until payday next Thursday. 

    Rent is paid. 
    Savings and and rainy day funds are topped up. 
    Car tax and insurance account is topped up. 

    I looked at my calender for next week and there's no direct debits out going so I'll have extra to "play with" which could most likely be put into Rainy day savings seeing as I don't have anything to buy once my shopping is done next week. 

    Have a lovely weekend 

  • Good luck on your journey you are very organised which is half the battle. x
    2024 Decluttering 1451 ⭐️
  • Good luck on your journey you are very organised which is half the battle. x
    Thank you for your reply 😊

    My friends think its strange for a 28 year old that I'm that organised and pretty much prefer to sit in with a good book or a good series on the TV than go out. Which is probably how I manage to save my money. You could say I'm an introvert but my OH is the same in a way. Once we've done our days work and he's gone to the gym and I've done what I needed to do in the house/cooking, I would rather have a nice hot shower and put my pj's on or if it's decent outside, go for a walk with my dog. I love doing my batch cooking on a Saturday morning so it means I've the the rest of the weekend to myself and not have to worry about catching up on cooking and prepping. 

    I do like to go for a meal and meet friends or go cinema every couple of months but I've honestly haven't seen the need lately, especially as we are still told to not go out although most places are open now, I'm still weary about being in places for a long time. I honestly loved lockdown as sad as it sounded. I have WhatsApp to video call so I wasnt missing out but I loved being able to stay in and not feel guilty for it 😂

    Have a lovely day 😊 
  • Hi 😊 

    OH is in work today. Its an early shift so he can pick up the little one from their mammys house we can spend a couple of hours with them. I'm looking forward too it. Going to charge up the moterised car that Santa gave last year (if I can find the charger!) LO is a bit older now so hopefully they have an interest in the car this time round but overal the whether seems fine so fresh air and a little bit of a walk with do us all good, also with the dog in tow.

    I'm  waiting on a wash to finish so I can hang them out, having coffee and wheetabix with fruit while I wait. One load thank god. I'm going to make my lunch for work tomorrow and make OH his meals for tomorrow. My plan is by this evening to be showered, pj's on and relaxed with a cuppa before I talk myself into sleeping as I'm awake at 4.30 am. Eeeeekkkk.

    I spent yesterday evening using the vacuum bags I bought the other day to store all old baby clothes that were in the wardrope. There's so much space now! I've tried to convince my OH to give old baby clothes to charity but he can't part with them. He's a sentimentalist and gets upset knowing his baby... isn't a baby anymore but a full grown toddler who knows how to make everyone smile. But will always be his baby nonetheless. In fairness LO had loads of clothes that could easily be passed down as some weren't even worn so ill be more than happy to hold onto.

    Overal house is spotless so I don't have to worry about whipping the hoover out. The dog is fed.

     FIL (I'm engaged but going to refer my OHs father to my FIL for shortness sake) is on his couch in the sitting room where he's glued most days. I rarely speak to him these days as lately he's been extremely lazy and has happily left me to fend to the housework which I've started cleaning my own room, bathroom, LO room and kitchen, the landing and stairs. I refuse to clean up after someone who doesn't want to clean up themselves. FIL is more than capible to do his fair share, he just doesn't bother so I'm not going to pick up after him. OH has stopped giving out to his father for his laziness and leaves him too it. I don't comment anymore either as it puts a negative spin on trying to save for our deposit. Its another reason why we would like to by our own home. FIL has no intentions of helping himself but is more than capible and is more than happy for myself and OH to run around only to find out, he actually can't be bothered doing most things so I leave him too it. FIL is the definition of a "grumpy old man" He's more than happy to sit in his chair and give out endlessly but when it comes to physically doing anything, there's a pain and grunt somewhere. FIL isn't old in the sense that he can't do anything, he blames everyone else for problems and doesn't understand that things in life don't get handed to you, you have to work for it. So now at the age of 70, he firmly believes that he can just sit around and moan about everything and anything while everyone else runs around after him. His arms and legs are working perfectly fine, he can go to the shops to buy his alcohol most days so that alone shows his priorities. He's hard work some days. 

    Over it's a calm Sunday. I've no reasons to go to the shops today as I've bought all I needed (we are running low on shower gel but I can run to Lidl after work tomorrow to pick up two bottles). It's another early start in work starting Monday, 6am until 2.30pm which I'm happy about. Whether is supposed to be decent as well, no rain and no excuse to not get outside. I'll make a point to visit my Mam this week for a cuppa and chats and possibly visit the grandparents. They have a better life than me to be honest so I nearly have to book an apointment to see them haha! They are retired but absolutly love life. Granddad recently got the all clear from getting his treatments for prostate cancer, as has my nanny got Breast cancer so both are cherishing life, also both in their 70s. 

    Happy Sunday 
  • I cancelled my Spotify membership as I found I actually wasn't using Spotify as much to enjoy the deal so I'm more than happy to listen to ads or if push comes to shove, listen to YouTube as I'm on YouTube every night to wind down. I know it was only €9.99 but that was going towards something I wasn't even using so that's extra to put in my Rainy days if needed. OH has his spotify connect to our Amazon firestick so I use that if I want to listen to music. I use the firestick to watch Netflix as its on a family account which my Mam pays for so I'm lucky I don't have to pay for that. 

    I've also joined a site called Irish Opinions which I started yesterday and now I've accumulated €3 and I've another €7 to go if I want to apply for a gift vouchure for a store of my choice but I might just let the money build up over time. Its not a site where I can enter my bank details so I won't be able to cash out the money but its nice to have something to look forward too. Plus its a grand way to waste 20-30 minutes if I'm not doing anything of interest. 

    Clothes are still on the line and nearly bone dry. 

    LO will be arriving in 1 hour so that's a couple of hours freed up to play with toys and go for a walk. Most likely going to watch Ben and Holly and eat some snacks and get some hugs if LO is in the humour haha! Otherwise it's play and run around.

    To save myself the bother of running into Lidl after work, I ran to the shops and picked up a bottle of shower gel that we needed. That was €1.70. 
  • Hi,thanks for reading and visiting my diary,I've just replied to your post and suggested you get yourself a diary 😀😀then I found you here,I shall subscribe and cheer you along 😊
    I feel for you living with your FIL, I couldn't have done that with my ex in-laws I would have been up on a murder charge 😀
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £6,050.1 Owed = £11,579.90
  • Hi,thanks for reading and visiting my diary,I've just replied to your post and suggested you get yourself a diary 😀😀then I found you here,I shall subscribe and cheer you along 😊
    I feel for you living with your FIL, I couldn't have done that with my ex in-laws I would have been up on a murder charge 😀
    Oh belive me it's very tough. Most days I've to bite my tongue and remind myself that there's a light at the end of the tunnel... Whichever tunnel that is 😂  FIL as spent all day today complaining about the government all the while sitting in his chair and talking about when he used to fleece the government and got away with it 🙄 He honestly pains me. My OH knows how to zone out, me on the other hand, I let it fester to the point where I've had to have inner talks with myself to not scream and to go out the back garden and play with the dog instead. It works! 

    Good luck on your journey and we can support each other 😊 X
  • Hi,thanks for reading and visiting my diary,I've just replied to your post and suggested you get yourself a diary 😀😀then I found you here,I shall subscribe and cheer you along 😊
    I feel for you living with your FIL, I couldn't have done that with my ex in-laws I would have been up on a murder charge 😀
    Oh belive me it's very tough. Most days I've to bite my tongue and remind myself that there's a light at the end of the tunnel... Whichever tunnel that is 😂  FIL as spent all day today complaining about the government all the while sitting in his chair and talking about when he used to fleece the government and got away with it 🙄 He honestly pains me. My OH knows how to zone out, me on the other hand, I let it fester to the point where I've had to have inner talks with myself to not scream and to go out the back garden and play with the dog instead. It works! 

    Good luck on your journey and we can support each other 😊 X
    Oh dear 😂😂
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £6,050.1 Owed = £11,579.90
  • LO arrived yesterday with her Daddy. We all played some games they had in their room and watched some TV. Daddy made LO their dinner and they puked so of course, an ice pop made everything all better and was right as rain!  LO is hitting the end of the terrible twos stages and we can definitely see a huge difference in them, temper wise. LO is still a great child at the best of times and extremely mannerly but can pull the biggest fit or pretends to cry when things aren't going their ways. I can see my OH getting frustrated as he feels he doesn't see LO that much and wants to have a stress free time with them but we all know children are unpredictable. LO loves her Daddy and will shower him with hugs and kisses so her tantrums often get ignored. Overal we all had a really lovely time and it was sad to see LO leave but they will be back tomorrow so that's another day to look forward too. 

    Early start this morning, 4.45am. I have to say I was out cold last night and woke up 5 minutes before my alarm and strangely I felt fresher than I had been all weekend considering I had lie ons but hey ho. Had my breakfast and pretty much skipped off to work not a bother on me. Usually I would be yawning and begging for the weekend to come again but honestly I'm not a bother. Even now as I write this on lunch hour, having a cup of tea and an hour to myself, the peace and quiet is utter bliss. Then when my lunch is over I have 2 1/2 hours left and then it's home time. I really can't complain about the hours I get in work. It's suitable. I have plenty of time after work to do all I need and still have a few hours to relax in the evenings. 

    The weather is utterly miserable today so I'm glad I went to the shops yesterday to save me the bother today. I can just go straight home when I finish work. No running in and out of the rain. 

    Today's to do list....... 

    Make OH his meals. 
    Have my dinner. 
    Give my dog her dinner. 
    Do a quick clean up and organise clothes to be washed so I can bung them in the washing machine tomorrow morning (and hope that my FIL will have the decency to put them on the clothes horse.... wishful thinking). 
    Have a shower. 
    Facetime my Mam (only if she's finished work and it's not too late!). 

    Basically a typical Monday really (minus being upset because it's Monday). Would this be classed a no spends day even though I have no money? 😂

    Only 3 more days until Payday!

    Hope all is doing well X 
  • Definitely a NSD even if you haven't got any money😂. My eldest grandson is three now and has meltdowns over the smallest things, I suppose in his little world everything is mega important, I do have to try not to laugh though because even though he is really angry it's quite comical to watch 😀
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £6,050.1 Owed = £11,579.90
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