My life is in tatters. I'm in £50k debt. Help!

Singlespeeder

ohdearhowdidthathappen said:

enthusiasticsaver said:

ohdearhowdidthathappen said:

elsien said:

On a completely random change of topic, ohdearhowdidthathappen have you changed your username, because if so I think I preferred the older version.

Yes, I had to change as someone complained to MSE about the use of profanity in my old one.  Sad times 
I preferred the old one too, much more accurate 

Really?  Some people are just far too precious. Did MSE suggest you change it or just alert you to someones objection?  Why on earth would someone pick on a user name of all things to complain about? 

MSE emailed me and said I had to change my username as they'd had a complaint and they don't allow the use of profanity on the boards.  I had to email them a couple of name change options and then they swapped it. I was a bit 'really?!' as I liked my old name, but whatever, done now... was trying to think of a witty alternative, but couldn't

ohsh!thow .... ? no profanity there

elsien

Singlespeeder said:

ohdearhowdidthathappen said:

enthusiasticsaver said:

ohdearhowdidthathappen said:

elsien said:

On a completely random change of topic, ohdearhowdidthathappen have you changed your username, because if so I think I preferred the older version.

Yes, I had to change as someone complained to MSE about the use of profanity in my old one.  Sad times 
I preferred the old one too, much more accurate 

Really?  Some people are just far too precious. Did MSE suggest you change it or just alert you to someones objection?  Why on earth would someone pick on a user name of all things to complain about? 

MSE emailed me and said I had to change my username as they'd had a complaint and they don't allow the use of profanity on the boards.  I had to email them a couple of name change options and then they swapped it. I was a bit 'really?!' as I liked my old name, but whatever, done now... was trying to think of a witty alternative, but couldn't

ohsh!thow .... ? no profanity there

According to MSE there is. I got a warning for trying to circumvent the rules when I used similar in a post. 

Singlespeeder

elsien said:

Singlespeeder said:

ohdearhowdidthathappen said:

enthusiasticsaver said:

ohdearhowdidthathappen said:

elsien said:

On a completely random change of topic, ohdearhowdidthathappen have you changed your username, because if so I think I preferred the older version.

Yes, I had to change as someone complained to MSE about the use of profanity in my old one.  Sad times 
I preferred the old one too, much more accurate 

Really?  Some people are just far too precious. Did MSE suggest you change it or just alert you to someones objection?  Why on earth would someone pick on a user name of all things to complain about? 

MSE emailed me and said I had to change my username as they'd had a complaint and they don't allow the use of profanity on the boards.  I had to email them a couple of name change options and then they swapped it. I was a bit 'really?!' as I liked my old name, but whatever, done now... was trying to think of a witty alternative, but couldn't

ohsh!thow .... ? no profanity there

According to MSE there is. I got a warning for trying to circumvent the rules when I used similar in a post. 

Gadzooks why are people so oversensitive.... Presumably everyone is an adult on here, and lets be honest it's barely a swear word. Heh ho... 

Fatsdom

Can we bring this back on topic please folks. 

flipflopflo

mumtopinkdinosaurs i was not suggesting they use equity in the house at all. I was only enquiring because it may very well be worth the OP petition for bankruptcy. 

Bubbles82

Hey, just to give you all an update. I took a business loan (the one from the government) as the interest is very low on it. Dad gave me a loan of 30k and I've worked out a way to pay him back. My hubby is still quite upset about it all but we're working through it together. I've signed up to that Prolific site and am doing surveys to try earn extra money. Wish me luck getting through it all! Thanks so much for your support xxxx

sharpe106

It is good that you seem to have come to part of a solution

Does that mean you now owe your dad 60K now? or was the 30K in your SOA what it would be ?

MalMonroe

pdel61 said:

BabyStepper said:

. At 1 and 3, they need their mummy even more than anyone else, including their daddy. 

I agree with everything that has been said except for this one line. Children need a loving parent or parents, and unless you are suggesting that two gay men would be somehow lesser of a parent then "need their mummy" has no place in this.

And the same of lesbian parents. My friend's daughter and her wife are the proud and loving parents of twin boys. I agree with your general point though. 

IrishSean

MalMonroe said:

pdel61 said:

BabyStepper said:

. At 1 and 3, they need their mummy even more than anyone else, including their daddy. 

I agree with everything that has been said except for this one line. Children need a loving parent or parents, and unless you are suggesting that two gay men would be somehow lesser of a parent then "need their mummy" has no place in this.

And the same of lesbian parents. My friend's daughter and her wife are the proud and loving parents of twin boys. I agree with your general point though. 

I think the context (PND) was correctly made for the direct impact it had on OP & her financial distress. I didn't read that there was any comparison of or slight made of other relationships, family setups or guardianships. If people wish to make wider sociological points based on their interpretation of what a new born needing her mother meant that's OK: but there are probably more appropriate forums than a money saving one.

Only birth mothers can experience pnd; to state that in the context of a loving mother baby relationship (context again, vitally important) makes noone anti lgbtq+, anti loan parent, adoptive parent  etc. (If ppl feel i'm wrong that's OK too )

OP I wish you all the best & hope you feel empowered by your posting, the support you received & seek further help as needed.

💪😊

LidLicker

Bubbles,
I lurk on the board more than I post, but I have just read all the posts on this thread and I just had to post.
Firstly, well done on that first post. I bet it took some going to post it, and by doing so it was the first step in getting some brilliant advice from some experienced and wise members on here.
Secondly I wish you well going forward. By no means will it be easy, but I am sure you will get there and you and your husband will have a happy future together
Good Luck