Living in Probate House, brother being threatening.

MovingForwards

Speak with a lawyer about an injunction / non-molestation order. Usually they do 30 minutes for free.

The difficulties are you live in the same house, what you are trying to do is effectively evict him from his home, so you are 'safe'. 

Lockdown doesn't prevent people moving home, doesn't prevent people going to a safe place to get away from DV. 

All three administrators need to speak, decide what to do with the house eg sell and split four ways, give it to your sibling, let your sibling live in it for X amount of time on the proviso he maintains it (won't happen), or he lives in it for life then it's split but again he would need to maintain it (won't happen). All any of you have done is made things worse by not setting anything out in 9 years, so he would see it as his home and his.

Meyor

Mojisola said:

Meyor said:

My parents have passed away and the house, a large one has been occupied by my brother who for the past 9 years since my mother passed away. The only reason I and my other siblings allowed him to to stay was because we knew he had nowhere to go and feared that with his substance abuse issues he would end up living on the streets

He is under the impression that because he is the only sibling who doesn't own a property, this family house now solely belongs to him.

This situation has arisen because of mistakes made by the three siblings who are administrators.

He has been the sole resident of the house for 9 years it's understandable that he thinks it's his house now. 

Any threats towards you are unforgivable but the three administrators don't seem to have made clear to him that he is only allowed to stay because you are concerned for his welfare and that you are all owners of the property.

Oh it has been made clear to him several times. He has obviously been living in delusional world and not taken this info on board. He tells all his friends that he owns the house and refuses to pay the council tax. I have started paying since the time I have been here but he still owes thousands of pounds in CT tax bills from when he was living here alone. I have been here for a few months now and in that time he has only give me £50 towards the PAYGO gas and electric meter. He never goes to the shop to charge them himself despite being out of the house all day. 

He has been financially supported by my sister, one of the other Administrators during his time in the house. Her stance has always been so he can get himself together. Out of respect for her, the other two Administrators have let her deal with it but it is clear that even she has reached the end of her tether now.

Mojisola

Meyor said:

Oh it has been made clear to him several times. He has obviously been living in delusional world and not taken this info on board.

Legally, in writing?

By not sorting out the estate, the three administrators have allowed this situation to continue.  By financially supporting him, your sibling has enabled his life style.

It must be awful to remove yourself from an abusive relationship only to have to cope with this but it should have been dealt with nine years ago.  

It would be a good idea for the three administrators to get some legal advice on how to deal with the estate.  Your brother may have gained some rights to stay in the property, having been the sole resident for so long.

Meyor

MovingForwards said:

Speak with a lawyer about an injunction / non-molestation order. Usually they do 30 minutes for free.

The difficulties are you live in the same house, what you are trying to do is effectively evict him from his home, so you are 'safe'. 

Lockdown doesn't prevent people moving home, doesn't prevent people going to a safe place to get away from DV. 

All three administrators need to speak, decide what to do with the house eg sell and split four ways, give it to your sibling, let your sibling live in it for X amount of time on the proviso he maintains it (won't happen), or he lives in it for life then it's split but again he would need to maintain it (won't happen). All any of you have done is made things worse by not setting anything out in 9 years, so he would see it as his home and his.

An occupation order is the type that will evict him and this I am not seeking to do. I want a non-molestation order which prevents a family member from harming me. 'Harm' can be in the form of threats, harassment or intimidation such as what U have experienced here. It will not remove the respondent from the home.

MovingForwards

Meyor said:

MovingForwards said:

Speak with a lawyer about an injunction / non-molestation order. Usually they do 30 minutes for free.

The difficulties are you live in the same house, what you are trying to do is effectively evict him from his home, so you are 'safe'. 

Lockdown doesn't prevent people moving home, doesn't prevent people going to a safe place to get away from DV. 

All three administrators need to speak, decide what to do with the house eg sell and split four ways, give it to your sibling, let your sibling live in it for X amount of time on the proviso he maintains it (won't happen), or he lives in it for life then it's split but again he would need to maintain it (won't happen). All any of you have done is made things worse by not setting anything out in 9 years, so he would see it as his home and his.

An occupation order is the type that will evict him and this I am not seeking to do. I want a non-molestation order which prevents a family member from harming me. 'Harm' can be in the form of threats, harassment or intimidation such as what U have experienced here. It will not remove the respondent from the home.

I know the different types of orders, I know how they work, your brother has issues, do you honestly think he will pay attention to a court order telling him to keep away from you? To not threaten you? 

That's why I said, you are effectively trying to get him evicted as that's the only way to keep him away inside the house.

Phone a solicitor, today, keep phoning around until you get one. Obtain paid legal advice and see what options are realistic.

Meyor

MovingForwards said:

Meyor said:

MovingForwards said:

Speak with a lawyer about an injunction / non-molestation order. Usually they do 30 minutes for free.

The difficulties are you live in the same house, what you are trying to do is effectively evict him from his home, so you are 'safe'. 

Lockdown doesn't prevent people moving home, doesn't prevent people going to a safe place to get away from DV. 

All three administrators need to speak, decide what to do with the house eg sell and split four ways, give it to your sibling, let your sibling live in it for X amount of time on the proviso he maintains it (won't happen), or he lives in it for life then it's split but again he would need to maintain it (won't happen). All any of you have done is made things worse by not setting anything out in 9 years, so he would see it as his home and his.

An occupation order is the type that will evict him and this I am not seeking to do. I want a non-molestation order which prevents a family member from harming me. 'Harm' can be in the form of threats, harassment or intimidation such as what U have experienced here. It will not remove the respondent from the home.

I know the different types of orders, I know how they work, your brother has issues, do you honestly think he will pay attention to a court order telling him to keep away from you? To not threaten you? 

That's why I said, you are effectively trying to get him evicted as that's the only way to keep him away inside the house.

Phone a solicitor, today, keep phoning around until you get one. Obtain paid legal advice and see what options are realistic.

Well I suppose that is me just not wanting to be too harsh in my approach. I have already sent him a text informing him that if he bangs on my door again and uses threatening abusive language then I'll be left with no option but to go for the injunction. Once that is served and he continues with his tirade, he will only have himself to blame if he is rendered homeless because I'll not hesitate to get the Police involved. I also have video evidence of his behaviour which he knows about. He can't say he wasn't warned. 

In the meantime I am looking at solicitors to see how I can go about exercising my rights to the house. I have spoken to the other Administrators about it. One is fed and the other is raring to get things sorted.

Thanks everyone for your advice.

Meyor

Mojisola said:

Meyor said:

Oh it has been made clear to him several times. He has obviously been living in delusional world and not taken this info on board.

Legally, in writing?

By not sorting out the estate, the three administrators have allowed this situation to continue.  By financially supporting him, your sibling has enabled his life style.

It must be awful to remove yourself from an abusive relationship only to have to cope with this but it should have been dealt with nine years ago.  

It would be a good idea for the three administrators to get some legal advice on how to deal with the estate.  Your brother may have gained some rights to stay in the property, having been the sole resident for so long.

No not in writing. But then that works both ways doesn't it? If there is nothing in writing then how can he assume that the house belongs to him solely, especially since the time he has been in the house, he has not been solely responsible for all of the bills and has received money from the estate.

I get that it should have been dealt with 9 years ago but what I didn't mention earlier is that there were other factors at play, namely a lengthy court case which took several years and a lot of mental energy at that time. 

getmore4less

He has been responsible for the council tax,who has been paying that?
if he is exempt for any reason and you have moved in you could be responsible.
NOTE : as someone was living in the place there is not class F exemption on the deceased property.
What probably needs to happen is the administrators get the place on the market and sold.

Meyor

getmore4less said:

He has been responsible for the council tax,who has been paying that?
if he is exempt for any reason and you have moved in you could be responsible.
NOTE : as someone was living in the place there is not class F exemption on the deceased property.
What probably needs to happen is the administrators get the place on the market and sold.

We the Administrators were served with a CT notice 4 years after my mother had passed away. He  was living the house completely oblivious that he was liable. In order to get the charging order which the council had placed on the property removed. We agreed to take money, thousands, out of my mother's accounts to clear it. We have made it clear to him that he was responsible for it from that time and so he put his name down as the sole resident..so on record he has only been the sole occupier for 5 years. However he has not paid, despite being liable to CT rebate since he is on benefits. He now has a charging order in his name only so when the property is sold, the CT will come out of his share.
 All of his money goes on his vices and part of the reason why I am been threatened and harassed is because I consistently ignore his requests for money to fund his habit.  

Yes..I know that I am responsible as I am now the only employed person in the house.

Savvy_Sue

You seem to be assuming that if you take reasonable, rational action, then he will behave in a reasonable, rational way. And you don't want to see him homeless. 

YOU need to move out if you want to feel safe. Harsh but true. THEN you need to take action to sell the house and distribute the proceeds.