Husband keeps getting us into debt

Fireflyaway

Malthusian said:

Fireflyaway said:

Could there be something underpinning why he is overspending? I've noticed recently my husband is buying an insane amount of clothes. Every time I see him ( we are separated) he is wearing a new top or sunglasses.

I can tell you what's underpinning your husband's spending - it's the 50% discount he gets on everything he buys until the clean break takes effect.

Was that directed at me? If so I'm not sure what you mean? Neither of us has any money or property so there is nothing to be gained financially on either side. He earns enough to buy the stuff he has, I just question why he buys so much stuff. I think it's to cheer himself up. We are not planning to divorce anyway. 

fred246

Malthusian said:

fred246 said:

Just treat him like the other children. Have all the money paid into your accounts and give him weekly pocket money.

Due to the legal position on coercive control this is now bad advice. The gender of the parties is irrelevant.

Yes FINANCIAL ABUSE. She is abusing him, trying to control his finances. He needs to go to a refuge like men's aid. I used to be the only earner in our family. My wife could have worked but preferred not to. I was not entirely happy but there was nothing I could do. We had a few lectures on abuse and I was always a bit bemused by the idea that I had to work all the long hours I did, but any attempt to control my wife's spending could be seen as abuse. I felt I was the one being abused having to do all the work.