Owning house outright before relationship and breakup consequences

Lokolo_2

Lover_of_Lycra wrote: »

Any rent to profit from someone you love would be taking the Mickey. You’re wanting to have your cake and it. I don’t think you’ll have to worry about someone wanting to buy into your property for a long time. Your issue at the moment will be forming a meaningful relationship with anyone since you will view everyone as a potential gold digger and will seek to profit from them if you can.

You may be right about the last bit, it is why I have decided to stay single up to now, so that I could build up my financial security as a partner would mean a lot more spending, dates, days out etc!

I never mentioned in the original post but I am male, not that it makes any difference but my prospective partner would be a woman!

I partly agree about it being wrong to profit from your partner, but then aren't they profiting from you on the other hand if they live rent free in a place?

Lokolo_2

DUTR wrote: »

It's all good and well but...…. chances are the person you meet may well be in the same situation as you eg own property with little or no mortgage.

This would be perfect :beer: It probably won't be the case but if it was then I would feel happy, when the relationship develops to either both sell up and a buy one place together if they have similar amount of equity or even consider renting out the 2nd property and in that case it would seem more balanced! If you know such a person please let me know so that I can get to know them :rotfl:

Lokolo_2

unholyangel wrote: »

Thanks for that, must've misread. But my advice remains unchanged - get it in writing so no matter what they agree to pay, its clear theres no expectation of gaining an interest.

Also, tenants & live in partner comparing apples and oranges...that may be the case morally, but its certainly not the case legally.

The question of what a partner should be charged isn't an easy one. If you only take half the bills then you're essentially paying for the privilege of their company (as you'll be covering repairs/maintenance required for you both to live in the property/caused by both of you living in the property).

IMO the fairest solution would be for the non-owning party to give half the equity to the owning party - so they would have both paid in equally, would both be responsible for upkeep equally and both have security in the property equally.

Although that isn't always possible so the next fairest solution (again imo) is to have them both save an equal amount through living together.

Hi Unholyangel, thank you for the reply!

I agree wholly with what you are saying, though the half the equity seems like more of a serious solution after marriage and as you rightly said it isn't always possible.

Possibly the idea of the partner who lives rent free putting into a joint account which then becomes a wedding fund and/or also pays for holidays, meals out etc I would feel that is more fair, so not related to the house but giving back in another way in return for living rent free. I can imagine some people will say this is immoral though!

Lokolo_2

Socajam wrote: »

Come back to me in a few years when someone who you love put you through hell and back
If you want to see the devil in the person you love, just wait until the relationship goes south.
I know what I went through and as I said there is no way in hell am I prepared to give someone 50% of my hard earned property.
When you had to live on one meal a day, interest at 15%, bare cupboards not even a bag of sugar and some teabags to make tea.
The banks charging you for going overdrawn, but you had no choice, walking down the street talking to yourself as if you are mad because you cannot see any end in sight. This all took place 1989 -1990, those terrible interest rate days.
So yes, I would tell anyone, secure what you have because life is a real ***** when the love turns sour.

Thank you Socajam, and sorry to hear of your past issues, it is definitely giving me food for thought, the effect it had on you, I would hate to go through something like that and I can understand why you feel like that now!

Zero_Sum

Lokolo_2 wrote: »

This would be perfect :beer: It probably won't be the case but if it was then I would feel happy, when the relationship develops to either both sell up and a buy one place together if they have similar amount of equity or even consider renting out the 2nd property and in that case it would seem more balanced! If you know such a person please let me know so that I can get to know them :rotfl:

Living rent free isnt profiting. Its just the lottery of life, from whom you end up with. Its no more profiting than if your future spouse was earning 3 or 4 times as you given that the assets are joined upon marriage.

Im in a similar situation (im mortgage neutral) and only 'charge' OH for half the utilities/council tax/food/holidays. I earn more, and she has a few financial issues that need sorting out so its pointless asking for more in way of rent.

DUTR

Lokolo_2 wrote: »

This would be perfect :beer: It probably won't be the case but if it was then I would feel happy, when the relationship develops to either both sell up and a buy one place together if they have similar amount of equity or even consider renting out the 2nd property and in that case it would seem more balanced! If you know such a person please let me know so that I can get to know them :rotfl:

I don't know what age you are, my last few GFs have been in the said situation, in fact some are probably better off than I.

Lokolo_2

DUTR wrote: »

I don't know what age you are, my last few GFs have been in the said situation, in fact some are probably better off than I.

I turned 30 in November! True it could happen that I find a partner who has more wealth than I do and in that case I would understand them trying to protect their interests too, it's modern day relationships sadly as nothing seems to last anymore from what I see around me, no more for better or for worse, till death do us part! :rotfl:

gozaimasu

DUTR wrote: »

I don't know what age you are, my last few GFs have been in the said situation, in fact some are probably better off than I.

Yeah Lokolo, how old are you?

Lokolo_2

Zero_Sum wrote: »

Living rent free isnt profiting. Its just the lottery of life, from whom you end up with. Its no more profiting than if your future spouse was earning 3 or 4 times as you given that the assets are joined upon marriage.

Im in a similar situation (im mortgage neutral) and only 'charge' OH for half the utilities/council tax/food/holidays. I earn more, and she has a few financial issues that need sorting out so its pointless asking for more in way of rent.

I sense everyone has differing views on this, I would see it as unfair personally, having worked hard for years to be in this position.

The answer is probably to find someone who has the same outlook as me and isn't offended by me wanting to protect what I have saved years to build up!

I can imagine more and more people are becoming more savvy to avoid losing their assets and will probably keep their finances separate from their partners and marriage will become rarer, but that is for another thread!

Lokolo_2

gozaimasu wrote: »

Yeah Lokolo, how old are you?

30, I did mention in the post directly above yours.