Debt free before August 2023 3 December 2019 at 12:15AM edited 3 December 2019 at 1:43PM in Debt Free Diaries 262 replies 12.2K views

Poppy1984

I feel so low today, I guess it's the Monday morning blues but I just feel rock bottom.

Works a struggle, moneys a struggle, my relationships a struggle, I've not been to the gym in ages with one thing and another, I'm a terrible comfort / binge eater and I'm gaining weight.

I've not slept well last few nights and I just don't know how I'm going to get through today. I feel utterly worthless, I just seem to let people down and be rubbish! My house is a tip I feel like everything's just a mess and that I haven't the energy to deal with any of it. Sorry for being such a misery I need somewhere to vent.

Poppy

Synchro

Hey Poppy,


I too have found myself in this misery pit at times.


It helps me to realise that I have a choice.


When I have these negative thoughts I remind myself that I am not my thoughts.


I can choose to observe them instead, and when I do they pass.


It also helps to distract myself.


Just one small thing that I can do to make things better. Even a tiny thing like cleaning the fridge perhaps.


Be kind to yourself.


This too shall pass!


Take care, Andy

FootyFanDan

Poppy1984 wrote: »

I feel so low today, I guess it's the Monday morning blues but I just feel rock bottom.

Works a struggle, moneys a struggle, my relationships a struggle, I've not been to the gym in ages with one thing and another, I'm a terrible comfort / binge eater and I'm gaining weight.

I've not slept well last few nights and I just don't know how I'm going to get through today. I feel utterly worthless, I just seem to let people down and be rubbish! My house is a tip I feel like everything's just a mess and that I haven't the energy to deal with any of it. Sorry for being such a misery I need somewhere to vent.

Poppy

I am so sorry to read you are feeling so low Poppy and its easy from the outside to say this but you should never ever feel worthless!! Ever

I tend to feel that if one area of my life seems crappy/out of control I tend to overthink other areas that could be okay but coz of the negative frame of mind it seems like everything sucks! We all have really tough days and you are battling so hard to conquer the debt/money struggles. as well as feeling unhappy at work.

From personal experience I have felt all the things you are feeling at this moment in time:

Money Struggles - Check
Hate job - Check
Feel like I suck at relationship - Check

sometimes it takes such courage to push through I found that the gym and running really focused me and although it was so hard some days to get up and do it I pushed myself.

You can do this and when you do you are going to be incredibly proud. Vent away if it helps

Sending you all the positive energy you need right now

Poppy1984

Synchro wrote: »

Hey Poppy,


I too have found myself in this misery pit at times.


It helps me to realise that I have a choice.


When I have these negative thoughts I remind myself that I am not my thoughts.


I can choose to observe them instead, and when I do they pass.


It also helps to distract myself.


Just one small thing that I can do to make things better. Even a tiny thing like cleaning the fridge perhaps.


Be kind to yourself.


This too shall pass!


Take care, Andy

Hi Andy
Thank you for those kind words, you're right it is a choice. I think the lack of sleep is probably what's magnifying everything to be honest.

Poppy

Poppy1984

FootyFanDan wrote: »

I am so sorry to read you are feeling so low Poppy and its easy from the outside to say this but you should never ever feel worthless!! Ever

I tend to feel that if one area of my life seems crappy/out of control I tend to overthink other areas that could be okay but coz of the negative frame of mind it seems like everything sucks! We all have really tough days and you are battling so hard to conquer the debt/money struggles. as well as feeling unhappy at work.

From personal experience I have felt all the things you are feeling at this moment in time:

Money Struggles - Check
Hate job - Check
Feel like I suck at relationship - Check

sometimes it takes such courage to push through I found that the gym and running really focused me and although it was so hard some days to get up and do it I pushed myself.

You can do this and when you do you are going to be incredibly proud. Vent away if it helps

Sending you all the positive energy you need right now

Hi Dan
Thank you so much for those kind words I think really needed to hear (read) that today.

Yes you're right I think it's the negative feelings about one thing leaking into all areas of my life. I need to try and reframe things.

Re the gym I know you are right and I feel better physically and mentally if I push myself to go. I just feel so exhausted today from lack of sleep the thought of going to the gym makes me feel like crying ( pathetic I know) I need to push myself to get back into the routine of going regular though. Somehow!!

Thank you, sometimes I just need to vent on here because I Feel like a burden to those around me who are all going through their own struggles. Although I suppose I'm still being a burden venting on here but I guess those have a choice to read rather than friends and family who I spend time with might feel drained by me.

Poppy

SuperFrank88

Poppy,

You are awesome!

Don't be too hard on yourself. Maybe go for a walk if you are not up to the gym yet. Leave your phone at home and just walk. That's what I do when I feel like that. Sometimes I even get emotional on that walk, I let it all out, take a few big lung fulls of the good stuff and start again. Life is precious

Sarahwithlove

Hello, I'm new to your journey, and just want to say well done on working hard to overpay your loan.

How is the job hunting coming along? Its one of things I am seriously considering at the moment. But don't want to do it unless there's going to be a significant improvement in my wages to make it worthwhile to lose the flexibility that I get with my current job.

I noticed you are overpaying your loan rather than building up some funds. Is it similiar to a car loan in that you pay less interest if you pay it off sooner? Otherwise is it worth building up a better emergency fund first? I'm trying to get a couple months of wages built up whilst my credit cards are 0% as I don't want to have to rely on them if anything big were to happen as I have done in the past

Poppy1984

SuperFrank88 wrote: »

Poppy,

You are awesome!

Don't be too hard on yourself. Maybe go for a walk if you are not up to the gym yet. Leave your phone at home and just walk. That's what I do when I feel like that. Sometimes I even get emotional on that walk, I let it all out, take a few big lung fulls of the good stuff and start again. Life is precious

Thanks Frank that's so kind of you I really don't feel awesome.

Yes you're right a walk in the fresh air without my phone is probably a good idea.
I think I'm just drained, from arguing with my partner over the weekend and not getting much sleep.

Thank you for the support

Poppy

Poppy1984

Sarahwithlove wrote: »

Hello, I'm new to your journey, and just want to say well done on working hard to overpay your loan.

How is the job hunting coming along? Its one of things I am seriously considering at the moment. But don't want to do it unless there's going to be a significant improvement in my wages to make it worthwhile to lose the flexibility that I get with my current job.

I noticed you are overpaying your loan rather than building up some funds. Is it similiar to a car loan in that you pay less interest if you pay it off sooner? Otherwise is it worth building up a better emergency fund first? I'm trying to get a couple months of wages built up whilst my credit cards are 0% as I don't want to have to rely on them if anything big were to happen as I have done in the past

Hi sarah thank you I'm trying hard but not getting very far with the overpayments.

Job hunting is going rubbish! Not found anything worth applying for.

If I overpay it will reduce my interest and the over all length of the loan. As far as my emergency fund I want to get it back up to £300, but I know that's risky as I could run into an emergency that's going to cost more than £300 I guess I'm just hoping I won't!

I do have other pots of money that I could dip into and move around and replenish if the worst come to the worst. I would use my over draft if I needed to in an absolute emergency but I would be aiming. To pay it back very very fast if I did.

So yea a bit risky but the reason why I'm wanting to focus on overpaying the loan is that I just want out of debt as soon as possible I am so fed up of being in debt! I admire your patience building up a couple of months wages!

Poppy

Poppy1984

Well I'm feeling a bit more of top of things, the house is looking better and I've half meal planned, I'm so wide awake so feels as though it's going to be another sleepless night. Which means tomorrow at work will be a huge struggle.

I've arranged to go to the gym on Wednesday after work, hopefully I can stick to it I'm meeting a friend to try and motivate me to actually attend.

I need to sort my mindset out and try and get out of this low way it's silly I know it is.

Poppy