Forum Home» Food Shopping & Groceries» Gone Off!

Money Moral Dilemma: Should I pay my friend for a smashed bottle of wine?

New Post Advanced Search
Important update! We have recently reviewed and updated our Forum Rules and FAQs. Please take the time to familiarise yourself with the latest version.

Money Moral Dilemma: Should I pay my friend for a smashed bottle of wine?

edited 30 November -1 at 12:00AM in Gone Off!
55 replies 35.5K views
MSE_KelvinMSE_Kelvin MSE Staff
157 posts
Third Anniversary 10 Posts Photogenic Name Dropper
MSE Staff
edited 30 November -1 at 12:00AM in Gone Off!
This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...
I asked a friend to buy me an expensive bottle of wine while she was away on holiday. Unfortunately it smashed in her case on the way home. Should I still pay her as she's been left out of pocket, or should I not?

Unfortunately the MSE team can't always answer money moral dilemma questions as contributions are often emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be enjoyed as a point of debate and discussed at face value.

:idea: If you haven’t already, join the forum to reply!

:huh: Got a Money Moral Dilemma of your own? [URL="mailto:"]Suggest an MMD[/URL].


  • VfM4meplseVfM4meplse
    34.3K posts
    I've been Money Tipped!
    For the sake of your friendship, pay up without arguing and don't ask again. I would probably draw the line at the cost of replacing damaged items.

    "No man is worth, crawling on the earth"- adapted from Bob Crewe and Bob Gaudio

    Hope is not a strategy :D...A child is for life, not just 18 years....Don't get me started on the NHS, because you won't win...I love chaz-ing!
  • FtbDreamingFtbDreaming Forumite
    701 posts
    500 Posts First Anniversary Name Dropper
    Yes you asked for it and the friend bought it. It's probably wrecked a lot of their own things too if its not washable. Id be fuming if you asked then didnt pay.
    Mortgage started August 2020 £69,700
    Mortgage ending August 2050
    MFW: August 2027
    Current Balance: £68,000 (LTV 82.9%)
    MFW2020 #156 £723.13/£2000
    MFW2021 #26 £166.27/£4200
    Emergency fund £155/£1000
    Determined to make it! 
  • Your friend only spent money on that bottle of wine because you asked them to. They'll be wondering what sort of friend you are if you don't offer to pay them! You need to give them the money, it's up to them if they choose to accept it.
  • PollycatPollycat Forumite
    30.1K posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Savvy Shopper!
    A MMD.
    Why was this first posted on the Overseas holidays board and then moved to the 'Food shopping and Groceries' board?
    If MSE can't post stuff on the appropriate board, what hope do we have from ordinary posters?
  • Pay your friend. They were kind enough to try and bring it back for you and as others have said, it may have damaged some of their posessions. It's a financial loss but it was a risk you were clearly willing to take (that it could be broken on arrival) when you asked your friend to get it for you. Life is not like a returns policy! Your friendship is more important than a bottle of wine x
    "Araf deg mae mynd ymhell" - "Go Slowly, Go Far" <3
  • YES.... at the very least you should pay for the wine.
    It actually is a concern you even need to ask tbh
  • MilieMilie Forumite
    12 posts
    Third Anniversary 10 Posts
    What was the circumstance in which a bottle of wine was so important that it had to come from a place where you were not going yourself, rather than you ordering similar from a wine merchant or supermarket here? And why didn’t you give the money to your friend before they left? It must have been a good friend to spend holiday time shopping for it and packing it. It’s foolish to transport that kind of thing in luggage. Unless purchased in the airport, your friend had no option but to put it in a suitcase where it was at the mercy of baggage handlers, trolleys, automatic carriers etc. It will have wrecked other stuff in the suitcase. Of course you should pay for it. And the cleaning!
  • REJPREJP Forumite
    215 posts
    Third Anniversary 100 Posts Name Dropper
    Presumably your friend had travel insurance (as always recommended on MSE.).
    So she claims for the wine and damage to contents within her suitcase.
  • The quick answer is yes. The longer answer is you need to find a way to come up with the best answer yourself. When I can't decide on something I find it easier to switch tables and put myself the the other persons shoes. had £2500 for a holiday - but £500 was for a friend who asked you to buy an even more expensive bottle of wine. You agree. You take time out of your holiday to go to the shops - you take out your money which you can't use on your holiday to buy it - you cart it around and it's heavy but you do it anyway because it's a good friend. You pack it neatly and then some !!!! throws your case around and breaks your friends bottle. It goes all over your non-waterproof watch, your clothes and the inside of your case has splinters of glass in - weaving their way into your clothes so you have to spend an hour or more painstakingly cleaning and rinsing everthing - you may even get a glass splinter in your finger for your troubles. You see your friend and explain. Would you most prefer the response to be: Blank irritated stare, arms crossed with the words..."well don't expect me to pay you for it" OR a warm smile with the words "oh no...what a disaster...sorry that happened, I really appreciate you trying for me - tell me all about it; let me get you a drink and square up with you though".
  • DeelightDeelight Forumite
    2 posts
    First Post First Anniversary
    MoneySaving Newbie
    Absolutely yes!
    They have bought it, carried it around etc etc.....
    I am surprised this question has even been asked!
Sign In or Register to comment.

Quick links

Essential Money | Who & Where are you? | Work & Benefits | Household and travel | Shopping & Freebies | About MSE | The MoneySavers Arms | Covid-19 & Coronavirus Support