Money Moral Dilemma: Should my ex-girlfriend come on the holiday we planned together?

REJP

Put the children first please. They will have been looking forward to the trip. I don't know the circumstances of your break up with your girl friend, in fact I don't want to know, but surely you can both act reasonably to give the children a great time.
Also, your ex may not be able to refund her costs.

lilmisstrouble

Be the better person and let her and kids go too. Agree some ground rules

POPPYOSCAR

consumers_revenge wrote: »

this all sounds a bit mickey mouse to me...

As do most of these 'Moral Dilemmas'

peg20

If the relationship broke up due to a reason that can never be resolved, then you might just be prolonging the pain and giving the kids false expectations. No matter how nice that might be in the short-term, it will be outweighed by the increased pain longer-term. But if there's no animosity and it's clear that this isn't a restart of something more, then that might be OK.

On the other hand, if both of you are willing to accept that there's a small chance that you might get back together, then why wouldn't you explore that?

Either way, the emotions of all those involved (not just you two, but the kids too) should be considered before any financial considerations. And bear in mind that the pain caused arguing about the finances might easily outweigh the cost of the holiday...

pff

You should totally put the children first, which doesn't mean go on some weird, super awkward, fake family outing. It means don't go on a trip with your ex. Even if your kids are young they can pick up on the weirdness. Maybe they'll think it means you and girlfriend are getting back together which could be confusing and hurtful for them.

I would see if I could get her half of the trip refunded, or if I could sell her tickets. If I had a buddy with kids I'd maybe even offer them a good deal on the tickets. Your kids don't have to miss out, you can still go with them and have an awesome time.

darryluk

Why do we have this inane section to the website? Is anyone actually learning anything from these dubiously 'honest' posts?

Pollycat

darryluk wrote: »

Why do we have this inane section to the website? Is anyone actually learning anything from these dubiously 'honest' posts?

Click bait.

RobDewar

Does the ex girlfriend get a say in this?

onwards&upwards

Socajam wrote: »

When did someone else's children have rights to the OP's money.
If the girlfriend is prepared to reimburse you, then yes, give her the tickets, otherwise she can buzz off.

He’s already bought them the holiday.

You don’t buy a present for a kid and then snatch it back because you fell out with their parent.

db2016

if you paid, its your call.

personally i'd like to think even when were together she contributed to the costs - eg paying some much off together as you do before the hols.

if it were me, i'd not wanna go with an ex, i also don't have any exes around aftet that. i'd want the cost covered by her.

it's a demotion imo, and can get messy. so best off to not keep em around in any capacity if can help it - IMO.