VelvetFreak is saving up to buy a house!

VelvetFreak

Good morning friends. I have woken up at 5:30am for some unknown reason so have been sitting in bed with a cup of coffee reading diaries. I have no plans for today but I do need to go grocery shopping and of course cleaning and washing, which I really don't feel like doing but oh well. I am supposed to be going on a date with a guy tonight but have not heard from him since thursday afternoon so perhaps he is ghosting me? (if that made no sense to you, look up the definition of 'ghosting' ). More's the pity. 'Tis a shame as he did actually seem like someone I would be compatible and get along with. We shall see if I get a message from him today but I don't have high hopes. Back to the drawing board. 

Here's my rant of the day: 
Online dating seems like the only real way to meet people and men don't want to approach you in person anymore and if a woman approaches a man she will be labelled as desperate or crazy. People stick to their own friendship groups and there's not much opportunity to meet people through friends. Everyone hates online dating yet we all do it anyway. There are plenty of guys on there but they are all for the most part either unemployed, cheating on their partners, addicted to drugs or otherwise undesirable for whatever reason. I try not to be too judgemental or negative, but most of the guys who message me are just simply not suitable. Maybe I'm being too picky but as a 26 year old woman with a decent career and my own place, I just don't want to be with someone who still lives with their parents and doesn't have a proper job

I am pretty happy being single at the moment and my life is good, but I also don't want to be single. There's things that I want to do in life that really do require a partner and that is just a simple fact. Some people like to say otherwise but the people who say stuff like that are also the ones who have been married since they were 20

In other news, I have been going well with my weight loss goals thanks to what can only be described as a Stress Diet

sashybo

Sorry to hear that you were so stressed out at work but glad your boss is finally doing something. Hopefully he gets through to the annoying co worker and she starts pulling her weight or even better flounces off in a huff and doesn't come back.🤞 Try not to worry too much about what you're going into on Monday, easier said than done, I know I would be worried too. 

Glad you went to the GP and hope the psychologist is helpful. Will you be waiting long for an appointment?

I get your frustration with online dating, I have several single friends and it just seems so hard to meet someone "normal". They're all fed up with it too. My mum has been using it for several years and the amount of weirdos or guys with baggage has been phenomenal. 😱 That might be more to do with her age though as most had been married previously etc. A lot of older men really don't seem to be good at coping on their own and a lot of them want to be mothered and run about after - my mum and friends aren't interested in that and I don't blame them!

I met my DH online but it was through a forum rather than an actual dating site. We just got talking and got on really well, DH actually didn't even realise I was female for the first while as my username didn't really give any clues. We're so old we used to use msn messenger to talk to each other. 😂 

VelvetFreak

Thanks Sashy, I appreciate your great replies always
It really is so frustrating. The older you get, the worse it gets because everyone starts having more baggage.
That's cute that you and your DH talked on MSN. I'm sad that it's not around anymore

VelvetFreak

Good morning friends
I did not go on that date last night. The guy messaged me at about 3pm, started a conversation with me and then when I asked him about dinner he said he was too tired and would see how he felt later, and now I haven't heard from him since. Very odd. All talk, no action. 

Anyway, I have pretty much made it to the end of the fortnight with $8.74 left in my spending budget which needs to last me the next two days, which will be fine. It was an expensive fortnight as I bought pet food and tickets for me and a friend to go to a play, and I went to the doctor. I would have been way over budget if I hadn't used grocery points to pay for most of the groceries. So there is nothing left to put into savings but that's okay. 

I have been doing online surveys like a woman possessed and have just cashed out $17 and I'm thinking I might start putting survey money into an investing app. There's one called Sp@ceship which looks like it could be interesting and does not have fees. 

The mortgage broker sent me an email with some information but the monthly payment was clearly calculated incorrectly and I emailed her back and now haven't heard anything? The rate that she could offer wasn't all that great anyway and now I am really put off by the whole thing.

I really did feel like going to the shops today but with no money left in the budget, I think I'd better stay at home and paint the bedroom wall or something

VelvetFreak

A productive day was had. I have painted the bedroom wall and not spent any money. Have also patched, sanded and painted some other random bits of wall. Now one wall looks better than all the others so I will have to paint all of them at some point
Also did a couple of loads of washing and now have the robot vacuum cleaner going
Am thinking that I should possibly put the loan refinance on hold until I have finished renovating the laundry otherwise I will never have the money to do it. 
Hmm

sashybo

Well done for not going out and spending money Velvet. 🍻 

How odd about the guy messaging but not wanting to meet up and just disappearing again instead of just saying it. 🙄 

Good idea about investing the survey money if you can, I didn't know you even got investing apps.

VelvetFreak

Another job interview today. I think it went well but I suppose we shall see. I went for the interview during my lunch break so didn't get to eat lunch and even though I've had dinner I've now got a huge headache
Work was busy so the day went quickly. 
Hoping for a good sleep tonight as last night was rubbish!

VelvetFreak

Yesterday was payday so I added my $582.35 to the Savings, which brings my total to $1,278.40
I'm hoping I will hear back from the job interview in the next couple of days. I'm feeling really conflicted and confused at the moment. The way that other places do things is so different to where I work, and one of my reasons for wanting to leave is to learn more somewhere else as we do a very simplified method of everything, but it's also a reason to stay. I suppose I am deep within my comfort zone of our little office. I also feel strange that the only reason I ever wanted to leave is because of The Annoying Coworker and if it weren't for her I never would have looked for another job. 

Anyway, I suppose I will wait and see if I even get a job offer before I start thinking about any of those things.

I had a follow up meeting with my boss yesterday about the coworker situation and also my own career development. It was somewhat productive and he is taking some steps to get The Annoying Coworker to either improve or he will start the process to performance manage/fire her, which is comforting. I think he is now understanding more why I am upset with her so much after he had his own discussion with her. He has asked me to keep taking screenshots of her mistakes and emailing them to him as well as telling him every time she speaks rudely to a client or staff member. Apparently she did not have a reason for why she is so rubbish at doing things, and she does not have any ideas about how she can improve . The mind boggles. The annoying thing is that this creates even more work for me having to send an email every time she does something stupid, and my boss wants me to be the one to create a checklist and audit her work if things go down that path. Yet again I am being punished for someone else's stupidity and lack of work ethic but there's no one else to do it so it will fall to me. 

As far as my own work goes, my boss is going to get me to take on some of the advanced work and The Somewhat Decent Coworker will teach me how to some of these things. No one else knows that she's pregnant yet so in a few months I will be taking on all of her work unless Boss decides to hire someone else to fill her position for a year while she's on mat leave. My boss is also allowing me to change my job title and tasks and posing it as a way to get The Annoying Coworker to take responsibility for her own work as part of her problem is knowing that I will always fix things that she misses. 

Overall I am feeling much better about things and life in general. My stress levels have reduced a lot (finally). 

I am hoping for a quiet and productive day at work, and to be able to focus and get the last little bit of my assignment done so that I can finalise this subject.

Cherryfudge

This does sound like progress at last! However, I think your boss should be doing the managing, not you... maybe you are better placed to spot the mistakes/laziness/bad practice but he's the manager, he should be managing. JMO but I don't want it to backfire on you. Helpful that he's allowing you to change your job title though. And the co-worker sounds like a spoilt madam, the office would be better off without her.

sashybo

Fingers crossed for a good result from your interview. 🤞 It does sound like a new job would be a challenge for you (in a good way) but I know what you mean about your comfort zone. I'm in a job that I can do standing on my head and I know that I'm capable of a lot more but for now it suits me. I've worked with the same people for nearly 10 years now, I get on with them and I know what to expect which I like as I like a routine. Leaving would be hard as I'm definitely in my comfort zone there!

I'm glad that your manager is finally starting to actually deal with the annoying co-worker but Cherry is right - he's still not really doing the actual managing, is he? Can you compromise and say you'll create a checklist but you won't have the time to audit her work? If he has a checklist then he'll know what to look for and she might take it more seriously if she knows that he's the one checking her work rather than you?

It doesn't sound like the annoying co-worker actually cares about her job if she doesn't have any ideas on how to improve (how about just actually do your job??) so maybe she'll solve the problem for you by being fired or leaving when she realises she actually has to pull her weight.