How do people cope while unwell?

bobwilson

I had a cold for over a week recently was really struggling to do basic tasks like food shopping, cooking or work. I've basically had to take over a week off work- which I couldn't afford nor wanted to do.

I'm usually a very responsible type of person and don't let people down, but it seems when I get a cold it's usually the mother of colds.

My question is, how do other people survive? I never noticed my partner getting unwell for more than a day or so, and everyone else I know seem to be able to just be ill whilst also going to work at the same time (so they can't be that ill).

When I have a cold, unless it's a minor one (rare), then I usually can't walk for more than 1 minute outside before I collapse or get dizzy & walk into walls. I can't do the most basic of tasks- when I'm well I can cook complex meals but when I'm ill I tried to boil an egg and it was a disaster. I can't think or even approach the idea of thinking about working. I usually have to sleep most of the time just to get over the cold.

If it wasn't for living WITH my partner, I don't know how I would survive. Appointments with repair men or food deliveries would go unanswered. Water leaks wouldn't be dealt with, responsibilities or emergencies wouldn't be handled. Any important appointments, e.g. court dates wouldn't be kept. I'd probably starve or lose a lot of weight, or end up in a lot of trouble.

I heard some people get a 'set number' of sick days per year- and they even take them while they're not unwell. What if you are genuinely unwell more days than that? When I had a cold, there was no way I had the energy to call the gp, talk on the phone, arrange an appointment (usually 2 weeks away), and travel to the gp, all just to ask for a sick note for having a cold, at which point he'd probably say "there's no blood test for a cold and you look fine" (by which time I'm probably better). Even if he saw me within 2 hours, I wouldn't have the energy to travel to the GP- if I did, I'd go to work!!

How do self employed people cope? Their business must go to flop.

How do single mothers or fathers cope?

How do single people cope?

I don't get it, what am I missing?

MovingForwards

People just get on with it as there is no-one to fall back on.

Sea_Shell

Dr Sarah Jarvis says...if you feel you haven't even got the energy to pick up a £20 note... it's probably Flu rather than just a cold.

UKTigerlily

You don't go to the GP for a cold, nor do they last two weeks. If the above isn't a 'man flu' windup, i'd suggest you keep getting the flu not a cold. Simple answer is, there is no choice but to get on with it if alone.

heatherw_01

I suffer with multiple chronic illnesses and can't walk far, can't stand long and am in constant severe pain for life.
I only cope as I have no choice.

comeandgo

Grow a set, you sound a wimp. A cold is no reason to visit the doctor. Single mums or people with no near help just have to manage, there is no other option. I remember my father, literally dieing on his feet but the animals need food and have to be fed.
Self employed should have insurance in place for illness and not working. If things were really bad for someone then a charity may step in and help with care or if they have money, they may have to pay for someone to assist them for a week or two.

lessonlearned

You need to get organised......

Illness happens, bad weather happens. You need to ensure that you are prepared. Always keep a well stocked freezer and food cupboards and a supply of OTC comfort meds

[Deleted User]

bobwilson wrote: »

How do single people cope?

I don't get it, what am I missing?

I guess they are glad there is no children to attend to.

I know myself when I had a cold/sore throat earlier this year, a certain slimming tea tasted really really lovely (not joking) and after the amount of days that boxes of painkillers suggest if you haven't improved then you need to be seeking medical advice (common sense has to kick in somewhere) so I did just that - the nurse at walk in centre wasn't able to give anything until after 10 days and suggested I go and purchase some antiseptic throat spray from the convenient nearby ASDA which as much as I thought here we go, did actually help. Day 5 at work the boss said what are you doing here and tried to micro manage what I was touching! :mad: (weird woman) still I did recently take 5 weeks off inbetween jobs and supported myself on greatly reduced wages but never felt so fine.

Have you been checked over for any under lying causes of why you feel so rough? Some medical probs means you'll be guaranteed the flu jab in future.

Fire_Fox

Stop self diagnosing. Don't let anyone tell you how you feel. They have no medical qualifications, have not examined you, asked you the right questions NOTHING. :mad:

Do you have any chest issues even very mild? Asthma, allergies, damp or dusty home or workplace? What you describe could easily be the common cold with a chest infection.

I was gobsmacked to be diagnosed with a chest infection fifteen months ago, at the very tail end of six weeks. That chest infection was not actually all that 'chesty' aside from in the first week, but my doctor could clearly hear the 'rattle' in one lung. Apparently it sounds different to a 'wheeze'.

I now realise I have had a couple of other, short chest infections. My family doctor told me that most mild to moderate chest infections are quite common, and often clear up by themselves within a couple of weeks. Some people never get them, some get mild ones often, some get severe ones occasionally. Everyone is different.

If this is happening often and is debilitating you I strongly advise getting an episode properly diagnosed. The doctor just listens to your chest/ back with the stethoscope. You cannot fake or exaggerate the results. They may well recommend a full chest/ asthma MOT with your practice nurse.

YOU DO NOT have to take antibiotics unless you both agree it is warranted. The diagnosis helps you understand your health better, get other linked issues addressed, helps you reduce the risk factors, boost your immune system.

I am mid 40s, do not smoke and never have. I drink far too much, and have a (treated) vitamin D deficiency. I have very mild wheezing, definite dust allergy, a reliever inhaler but no disgnosis of asthma. Flat with terrible ventilation, condensation damp, inadequately heated in winter.

Your situation may be entirely different of course! May be another undiagnosed health problem not chest infections. Just trying to show that people with chest infections and their symptoms can not be obvious candidates. Everyone I knew personally to have a chest infection was a smoker or quite a bit older than me.


I am disgusted with some on MSE for dismissing clear medical symptoms. Please come back if you get a diagnosis and help others.

melanzana

If I start sneezing, I wait until I get a scratchy throat, then I know it's a cold not just a fit of sneezing!

What I have found works for me is a daily non drowsy antihistamine, really helps with the stuffy nose. Hot honey and lemon (sometimes with a tablespoon of whisky ha ha) really helps with a scratchy sore throat. If taken at night the zzzzzs happen quickly too cos of the whisky!

When the cough starts, don't laugh, but vicks vapour rub on the soles of your feet (obviously put socks on after) works to stop the night coughing.

Summer's a coming, so the really bad flu like infections won't kick in until say October/November etc. Early nights during a cold help too.

Fire_Fox

You asked how single people manage ... depends how ill you are, who you have around, other factors.

Many of my friends and associates are Northern singletons (mainly men) who take poor care of themselves. Life expectancy is much lower than average. There is a short row of 'uncles' sat at the bar in the sky with a pint.

I have chronic health problems so I take care of myself badly for long periods. Occasionally you just have to leave vomit, or crawl to the bare essentials (for me feed the cat). Worse and I would telephone someone, or crawl into the outside corridor if I needed hospital.

My ex was in hospital for seven weeks earlier this year, released for ten days then back for two weeks. He only went back because I ordered and paid his taxis hostel to family doctor, doctor to hospital, brief fast food interval as not eating. Could barely hobble, legs like balloons.

He had an untreated chest infection, then untreated pneumonia, eventually he requested an ambulance when he had just hours to live. Several life-threatening complications (sepsis/ blood clot/ valve damage). He is forty+, slim, a smoker from a family of smokers, various other more private health problems. He would be dead if he had been told to man up even in jest. He should have seen the doctor weeks before but is a stubborn fool.

But single men are the bottom of the pile when they need certain types of help and support. Not elderly, no resident children, not vulnerable women, not families. Won't admit the one thing that might 'tick the box' (mental health issues).

So no, single people don't always just cope or manage or get on with it. Or they do until found dead before their time. As a female secure homeowner I get offered more of the help and support that they need.

With my professional hat on (ex heathcare) ....

Diet/ nutrition is VERY important in a healthy immune system and reducing inflammation (key in most health problems!). Our diet needs to be properly balanced and varied, meet ALL of the official healthy eating guidelines not just the well known ones. The guidelines work together. Wholefoods not vitamin/ mineral tablets unless your doctor or pharmacist agrees.

Most of us in the UK are way off the mark, certain deficiencies are rife. The UKs biggest fail? Oily fish for vitamin D and omega-3s. Up to four servings a week is officially recommended.

Do double check this with your family doctor or practice nurse. End of lecture/ rant.