Trying to mediate a house purchase

Emanresu321

cooltt wrote: »

You know what, it's really easy for everyone to sit here and judge the state of a relationship from a straight forward question but the reality is nobody (including me) knows the details of my friends or anyone else s relationship / marriage for that matter.

As far as I'm aware there is no blueprint for the perfect marriage because everyone is different and individual experiences of a similar situation are completely irrelevant due to what I've already pointed out, everyone is different. What a terrible place to be in life feeling the need to judge rather than help.

Thank you @AdrianC, that was my thinking but ultimately i don't know the answer either, i was merely asked to provide an impartial opinion, what they do after that is up to them.

I guess most people in this situation would just pool the money and the outgoings, as the replies above suggest.



The other option is for husband to put down the 50% & them to get a joint mortgage for the 50% and a deed that the house would be divided 75/25 if they divorced, protecting the husband's original input.


If they really wanted to keep this strict 50/50 arrangement, then I agree with the above - the wife should pay the interest.

If two friends went for dinner, always split the bill equally, one paid cash, other paid interest attracting credit card, one friend will pay more overall. Doesn't mean the cash holding friend should have paid more too.

onwards&upwards

cooltt wrote: »

Oh right, i see, get pushed back on pointless judgement comments then go on the defensive.

The situation is posted as is, good friends nothing more. The wife earns considerably less than her husband but has always maintained a 50/50 split on everything, going on for 8 years now. Like i said no blueprint for the perfect marriage and to judge others on a tiny snippet of their life, pretty idiotic to be honest.

So what if one of them becomes disabled or ill? No kids I presume?

50/50 is for flatmates or people who earn exactly the same amount.

getmore4less

cooltt wrote: »

Oh right, i see, get pushed back on pointless judgement comments then go on the defensive.

The situation is posted as is, good friends nothing more. The wife earns considerably less than her husband but has always maintained a 50/50 split on everything, going on for 8 years now. Like i said no blueprint for the perfect marriage and to judge others on a tiny snippet of their life, pretty idiotic to be honest.

50:50 is a recipe for conflict where earnings are mismatched and the higher earner gets to pick.

The lower earner should ecide the amount to spend then you double that, be it a meal out, a holiday or a house.

If the higher earner wants better they pay for both for the upgrade.

cooltt

onwards&upwards wrote: »

50/50 is for flatmates or people who earn exactly the same amount.

Oh i do apologize, I must of missed that piece of legislation.
Jeez, enough already.

AnotherJoe

cooltt wrote: »

Oh right, i see, get pushed back on pointless judgement comments then go on the defensive.

The situation is posted as is, good friends nothing more. The wife earns considerably less than her husband but has always maintained a 50/50 split on everything, going on for 8 years now. Like i said no blueprint for the perfect marriage and to judge others on a tiny snippet of their life, pretty idiotic to be honest.

Then the answers simple. Each is providing 50%. Its irrelevant that for one of them they have to pay interest, (a) thats their problem, and (b) the one putting up the cash is losing out on interest or dividends from whatever it could have been invested in instead. So, wife pays the interest. Simples.

Nebulous2

Imagine a 100% mortgage. The wife pays half. Now take away his half of the mortgage because he’s paying his half off with cash. She’s still paying the same for the same half.

onwards&upwards

cooltt wrote: »

Oh i do apologize, I must of missed that piece of legislation.
Jeez, enough already.

Ok, well life will teach the lesson well enough without needing me to!

ka7e

What if... the husband is the higher earner and has managed save the 50% deposit because his wife has always split bills 50/50, even though she earns less? Maybe she has never had the capacity to save, as a higher percentage of her earnings have been spent on everyday expenses.

AnotherJoe

ka7e wrote: »

What if... the husband is the higher earner and has managed save the 50% deposit because his wife has always split bills 50/50, even though she earns less? Maybe she has never had the capacity to save, as a higher percentage of her earnings have been spent on everyday expenses.

Tough luck, apparently she has "always paid 50/50" so the same argument applies to meals, holidays whatever, maybe she's bought her half of a holiday on credit card and paid interest on it. That's what she has agreed to according to the OP. Now she's trying to change it. Perhaps the pennys dropping ?

diggingdude

Cooltt just pay the interest on the mortgage you need