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Husband left me with debt and mortage. House to be repossesed.

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Husband left me with debt and mortage. House to be repossesed.

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in MoneySaving Mums
10 replies 5.8K views
RooBee1967RooBee1967 Forumite
1 posts
edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in MoneySaving Mums

My and my husband of 17 years separated a year ago. We have one child who is doing her masters, living at uni.

Our marriage broke down 2 years ago after he lost his jo. He lied about being fired for months and was failing to pay mortgage.

I moved out to a seperate flat and he moved in with his mother whilst we rented the house out. We had family friends who we had in to pay the mortgage privately. They fell behind a lot of rent payments so I evicted them, and made the decision to move back in solely rather than paying two seperate lots of bills. (For flat & house) they still owe me over £1000 in bills and I have been completely blocked out.
Due to mortgage being in arrears our mortgage lenders would not let us rent the house out. So this isn’t an option for me, which may be for the best due to previous experience.

Ex husband has not paid a single penny towards the mortgage, joint account loans, credit card, anything since separating nearly two years ago. He enjoys burying his head in the sand and always has. His way of thinking is that he paid mortgage/bills for years so he is entitled to the same (which I know is true - not an issue)

My mother has helped us a lot with mortgage arrears, debts & bills. She paid the arrears of mortgage off. Even paying £10,000 of ex husband credit cards when we lost job. He still owes her all this.

Mortgage is £800per month which I am paying as much as I can off but struggling to make full payments by myself.

I am holding onto my home with dear life and I just want something of mine for my daughters inheritance.
I have offered to pay him out. Even offering to sign the house over to my daughter if anything happens to me. But I don’t think he wants me living in the house we both built for years and would rather see it repossessed. The house is up for sale and has been for two years. I would also struggle to get another mortgage if this one sells as my credit rating has taken a hit from the last two years as a consequence of me paying EVERYTHING myself.

He does not respond to any of my text messages or calls. I have had numerous debt collectors at my door. After months of ignorance I hunted him down at his gf property. We spoke CIVILY and He agreed to think about outcome but has never got back to me (GR!!!!)

I’ve spoken to mortgage lenders and they won’t let me reduce my mortgage due to continuous arrears. I have now been served court order for repossession (great)

What can I do to save my home when the other owner is not co-operating?

Should I give up?

I don’t know who to contact or what to do. I’ve been to solicitor and filed for divorce months ago. I’m STILL waiting for him to provide information about his pension for assets evaluation?

I feel physically sick every day, doctors are telling me i'm stressed and offering anti-depressant which I cannot risk taking with my job.

Long shot but if anyone is in the same situation please shed some light as I'm desperate for help.


  • hillcatshillcats Forumite
    884 posts
    Part of the Furniture 500 Posts Photogenic
    Sorry to read of your very horrible situation, I do hope it all works out for you long term .
    ORIGINAL MORTGAGE AMOUNT £106,454.00 (Started Sept 2007)
    FEB 2020 O/S AMOUNT £2,179.86 OUR DEBT REDUCED BY £104,274.44By Std Regular, Over-Payments & Off-Setting.
    BofE +0.19% Tracker Repayment Offset Mortgage Discounted Sept 07-10 then increased to BofE +0.62% until 2027
  • HampshireHHampshireH Forumite
    2.3K posts
    1,000 Posts Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    For a start do not try to sign it over to your daughter. It's likely to be a huge burden for her. She will lose any 1st time buyer benefits and be saddled with the house. Also how wouod she get a mortgage. This is a no go.

    Why isn't the house selling? Is it up with a reputable agent. Ia it reasonably priced? If you want tips on promoting it better and why it may not be selling the house renting and selling forum is a great starting place. However usually comes down to being overpriced. If you need a sale then undercutting the market makea your property more attractive.

    Sounds like your ex is more than useless and you just aren't going to be able to work with him...... so for now probably best to stop trying. However will he be on board enough to sign sale paperwork if it happened?

    Does he realise that a repoession will also stay pn his file?

    There is a mortgages forum here too which may be able to advise you on more specific advice in relation to that.

  • ViolaLassViolaLass Forumite
    5.8K posts
    If you sell it, will there be any equity for you? Enough to pay off debts and start again?

    There's a lot to be said for a clean start. Leaving an inheritance is nice but you need to think about now.
  • -taff-taff Forumite
    11.8K posts
    10,000 Posts Seventh Anniversary Name Dropper Photogenic
    Unfortunately, if you are both on the mortgage, you are jointly and severally liable. One or both of you are rquired to pay the mortgage and any mortgage shortfall [for example if you sell and have negative equity] can be pursued for 12 years, not six, like other non secured debts.
    Unless you had a written agreement for himt o pay your mother back, you can probably kiss goodbye to that money, unless he agrees to pay it as part of any surplus funds if you sell and if there are any.
    Your joint accounts and any joint credit cards are the same as far as liability goes, so if you have paid them off, shut them down.
    There's not much you can do with regards to him paying anything if anything is in joint names.

    See your solicitor again to see if he can speed things up or what he can realistically do that has a good chance of working as far as the divorce goes. Its possible your husband would sign over his share of the house to avoid having his pension taken, but then, you are in the same position of needing to pay the mortgage by yourself.

    Sorry this is all doom and gloom, but if you really intend to sell the house then you need to look at what has sold recently in your area with regards to your type of house, and for what price. A house not selling or that long is usually an indication that you are asking too much for it.
    Ask on the house selling board for more advice.
  • ViolaLassViolaLass Forumite
    5.8K posts
    Isn't it possible that the house has not sold because potential buyers have got whiff of the other owner not wanting to sell and steered clear? I would.
  • deannatroisdeannatrois Forumite
    7.2K posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    If the house is repossessed, you will lose far more money than if you sell it yourself, for a lower price than it is on offer at at present. Mortgage lenders add all kinds of charges onto the account when they repossess.

    Lower the price til its at a price that can't be refused. Hopefully there will be enough equity for you to start again in some way.

    I'd also advise getting rid of some furniture, you are likely to move to a much smaller place and might still get some money if you declutter drastically by selling non essential items. You might have already done this of course.

    If the place needs it, try getting cheap trade matt emulsion in a light colour and repaint to make it more appealing. But give it a good clean first, furry skirting boards are noticeable (I'm only saying this because its an ex-rental) lol.
  • shiny76shiny76 Forumite
    526 posts
    Ninth Anniversary 500 Posts Combo Breaker
    Are you able to take on a lodger to make ends meet?
  • BluecoddBluecodd Forumite
    2 posts
    You need free advice maybe from Citizens advice ?
    My sister was in a similar situation and they helped her through it - she managed to remove ex from mortgage and do a new deal!
  • TBagpussTBagpuss Forumite
    8.1K posts
    Ninth Anniversary 1,000 Posts
    Push ahead withthe divorce. If you husband is ignoring requests for disclosure, issue a finacial application anyway. U;ltimately if he doesn't comply with court orders then you can tell the court what you want, why you thinjk it is fair, and ask them to make an order without having sen his finances, if need be.

    In your case, that might be asking the court to order that the house is trnasferred to you subject to the mortgage, or to order that the house is sold and you get the sale proceeds. If it comes to it, a courtcan make an order which allows the Judge to sign paperwork so that the sale or transfver can go through.

    If you beliv ethat your husband has pensions of significant value then you could also ask for orders that you have a % of the pension - the court can make that order even if it does not know the value of the funds (and again, a court can make an order allowing a Judge to signpaperwork instead of your husband doing so)

    It is a long process and more expensive than if your husband was cooperating, but it can be done.
    All posts are my personal opinion, not formal advice Always get proper, professional advice (particularly about anything legal!)
  • Thanks for the advice.
    I'm going to go ahead and paint some of the rooms again in anl light colour to get it on the market quickly.
    A friend is going to come and help me do this which is great.
    I've started to sell things but some things haven't sold.

    it's quite a new house so it should go well as I'll be selling it for a lot less than the other detached houses that are new in the same estate. lm going to speak to my solicitor about how l get that garuntee of the money I payed the deposit with.
    It was quite a large amount of money and I'm hoping to get some of it back because I have an unwell child and I need to pay upfront to rent a place for some time.

    I'm going to phone the c.a.b. tomorrow and shelter and see if I can get some advice and then speak to my solicitor.
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