Should I spend money for my children’s private education or save money for them?

noradylan20

Thank you for your kind replies so far.

I would be totally happy if we could:

- find an Oustanding secondary state school
- in an area which allows us to travel to work fairly conveniently. For example, I cannot move to an area 2 hours away from our current offices.

Buying a house close enough to a state school is always tricky, as you all know many want the same school. What if we move and buy a house near a targeted state school, and then it turns out we will have to wait indefinitely until our children can get into that school.

This uncertainty plays an important role in my difficult thought at the moment.

maman

Many posters have responded with genuine views on the subject.

The OP though doesn't sound genuine but information gathering for some other purpose.

Just my thoughts.

Comms69

maman wrote: »

Many posters have responded with genuine views on the subject.

The OP though doesn't sound genuine but information gathering for some other purpose.

Just my thoughts.

The posting style certainly didn't strike me as someone with half a million in the bank

NBLondon

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

We thought about sending ours to private school(secondary) and it would have been a struggle.

However, they were against it and wanted to go the same school as all their friends..

My parents made me the offer in similar circumstances - and I declined as well. I don't know whether it would have been an advantage... I don't think there would have been that much of an academic advantage - I got that by paying lipservice to Catholicism to get smaller class sizes and grammar school ethos. Connections possibly - but I've never been a networker so probably I wouldn't have capitalised on them.

ibizafan_2

We moved into the neighbouring county to be in the catchment area of good state grammar schools. It was an upheaval, and a gamble, because they might not have passed the 11 plus, so we had to make sure the local high schools offered a good education if they didn’t. It was the best decision we ever made, as they did pass and have both done very well. To those who say that they would have done just as well at a comprehensive, I’m sorry but they wouldn’t have. They were both quite lazy academically, and benefited from the much higher expectations, and mixing with mainly motivated students.

MandM90

It depends on:

1) The private school
2) The state schools on offer

DD is at a very prestigious private school, and we live in a relatively cheap house where state school options were dire. I don't regret it. She's had a wonderful, wonderful experience.

Private schools vary so wildly: there are the religious ones, cheap ones with crumbling facilities and staff, ones where you just pay for a swimming pool (and not quality of teaching) and ones where the quality of teaching, pastoral care and facilities truly surpass local state counterparts. I know people that have loved private school (my MIL), people that said theirs was crap, and others (like me) who thrived in a grammar school environment.

You're right that fees are high. There are many ways to use money as a tool to improve your kids lives and increase their chances of economic success:

You might want to think about investing that money in a property within catchment of an outstanding school, or if there is a good local state school, investing the fees in low cost index funds.

If you had ~14k a year to spend whilst your child is 4 - 18 years old, you could put it in a low cost index fund ISA (e.g. Vanguard) instead. If it achieved an average return of 7%, for a total deposit of under £200k there would be over £347k in there by the end of the 14 year period.

Of course there is also time. Would this sum of post-tax money allow one parent to stay at home and support education and growth (which is of course not just around academics) around the margins of schools?

I think this is all to say that there is no clear answer from the information you've given. If I were you I'd run the numbers on investing the money instead, visit local schools, talk to other parents, and try to get a sense of which options most closely aligns with what you're trying to achieve.

rach_k

It's an easy decision for me as I think private schools are evil, allowing those who already have the most privileged lives to cocoon themselves away rather than share a little of their privilege with the riff raff. My children will go to non-selective state schools. We'll put our time and energy into those schools and they'll be fine. I firmly believe that parental involvement plays a huge part in a child's success at school.

My husband went to a selective private school and so did most of his friends. Although most of them are thoroughly nice people, they've led sheltered lives in some regards and don't always have a good understanding of how 'normal' people live. I don't want that for my children, it would be a disadvantage.

POPPYOSCAR

There is a difference though.

My niece is a teacher in a private school.

She tells me the pupils are no more intelligent but they get better results because the class sizes are smaller and she can therefore give more individual attention to each child.

Quite a few of the parents are not rich and are giving a lot of their income to pay the fees.

noradylan20

Thank you so much for your detailed answer.

Regards,

MandM90 wrote: »

It depends on:

1) The private school
2) The state schools on offer

DD is at a very prestigious private school, and we live in a relatively cheap house where state school options were dire. I don't regret it. She's had a wonderful, wonderful experience.

Private schools vary so wildly: there are the religious ones, cheap ones with crumbling facilities and staff, ones where you just pay for a swimming pool (and not quality of teaching) and ones where the quality of teaching, pastoral care and facilities truly surpass local state counterparts. I know people that have loved private school (my MIL), people that said theirs was crap, and others (like me) who thrived in a grammar school environment.

You're right that fees are high. There are many ways to use money as a tool to improve your kids lives and increase their chances of economic success:

You might want to think about investing that money in a property within catchment of an outstanding school, or if there is a good local state school, investing the fees in low cost index funds.

If you had ~14k a year to spend whilst your child is 4 - 18 years old, you could put it in a low cost index fund ISA (e.g. Vanguard) instead. If it achieved an average return of 7%, for a total deposit of under £200k there would be over £347k in there by the end of the 14 year period.

Of course there is also time. Would this sum of post-tax money allow one parent to stay at home and support education and growth (which is of course not just around academics) around the margins of schools?

I think this is all to say that there is no clear answer from the information you've given. If I were you I'd run the numbers on investing the money instead, visit local schools, talk to other parents, and try to get a sense of which options most closely aligns with what you're trying to achieve.

POPPYOSCAR

rach_k wrote: »

It's an easy decision for me as I think private schools are evil, allowing those who already have the most privileged lives to cocoon themselves away rather than share a little of their privilege with the riff raff. My children will go to non-selective state schools. We'll put our time and energy into those schools and they'll be fine. I firmly believe that parental involvement plays a huge part in a child's success at school.

My husband went to a selective private school and so did most of his friends. Although most of them are thoroughly nice people, they've led sheltered lives in some regards and don't always have a good understanding of how 'normal' people live. I don't want that for my children, it would be a disadvantage.

I used to think that.

Did not work that way though and both our children could not wait to leave and go to college.

I found the school concentrated on the high achievers and the stragglers.

Those in the middle were left to get on with it.