Should we move area? -Advice please

Running_Horse

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

I actually think your girlfriend is being a bit selfish but there is not a lot you can do about that if she won't change her mind. Her priority imho is to the baby and your own little family unit, not living next door to mum, it sounds as though she is not mature enough to be having a relationship, let alone a baby.

Strongly disagree. My wife chose the area, then chose the house. This is probably true in most cases, and all the bloke can do is make a case then let her decide. She is the one who is going to be stuck indoors with a baby all day (and its bl00dy hard work). If she's happy, then I'm happy, and the baby's happy.

seven-day-weekend

Running_Horse wrote: »

Strongly disagree. My wife chose the area, then chose the house. This is probably true in most cases, and all the bloke can do is make a case then let her decide. She is the one who is going to be stuck indoors with a baby all day (and its bl00dy hard work). If she's happy, then I'm happy, and the baby's happy.

I couldn't disagree more. My husband and I chose our homes together, it's our home, not just mine, and is a joint decision. I wouldn't dream of telling him where he has to live and would be terribly upset if he wasn't sufficiently interested to want to be involved in the decision.

You don't have to be 'stuck in' with a baby. There are plenty of things you can do. That's a choice.

Anyway, that's off topic.

In their situation I feel they have got to stay near her mum. Therefore they will have to compromise and either stay in a house that's too small for them but they can afford, or find a bigger one that's more expensive and cut down somewhere else.

OP, I hope you find something.

seven-day-weekend

two_sheds wrote: »

I don't think anyone is in a position to say this; we don't know the girl. A strong family is important for the upbringing of a baby - an unhappy, isolated mum isn't going to be the best new mother.
I don't have any answers. On paper it looks like you should move nearer to your work, but then again...
I moved from Norfolk to the South East and back again, for work. I realised that family and friend relationships are important... earning lots of money for a bigger house is nice, but you have to consider everything, not just the financial position. I am now looking to move again next year, further away from my family again. I will see less of them, but will try to make it "quality time"

You could always move, try it for a year, then move back if it's terrible?

Yes, I agree and I did say it was only my opinion and used 'I think' rather than stating an absolute.

GarethK

Thanks for all your thoughts and comments, very interesting!

Progress so far, yesterday we had a break through albeit emotional, she realised that the place we lived before was far nicer than here, and that she could picture seeing our son on the playing fields just across the road.. when we moved the originally we both said what a nice place it would be to bring up a child.

So now we have to wait, she is having the baby here because she likes the hospital here and it saves hassle switching things over, so we are here until April, and then we are off!

Gareth

do_it_today!

Good Luck!