Adventures of the Boy & Me: Part 3..

Chandelier.

Hello,

The wedding went really well last night and I enjoyed myself. I got to meet some new people and spent the rest of the time dancing the night away. As I was driving, I stayed on soft drinks. I think my total spends came to less then £5 which is good and frees up funds for other things I intend on doing.

As it was a late night I had quite a bit of a lie in this morning. We then went out for breakfast which was lovely before I headed back home.

I'm feeling so happy and content right now. I want things to continue improving and for everything to fall into place. I already feel like a different person compared to the shell I was just over a month ago.

It's like I'm just having a different perspective/outlook on life right now.

I'm tired of the negativity that at some point has entered my life. I don't have the energy or headspace to deal eith it. From now on, I only want positive vibes. Anything else can stay away. I'm learning to let go.. finally.

I'm really getting into the hang of improving my health. There are a couple of things I want to do and hopefully I can find the strength and motivation to do these. The main one is to quit smoking- it is not doing me any good and is a drain on my surplus funds. I use it as a psychological crutch for when times get hard and stressful. I need to stop, now more then ever whilst I have the time and space to. I hate to admit but I've been spending around £200 a month to fund this habit.. that could go towards further savings or other funds. It could mean more days out/experiences for both myself and the boy.

It's going to be hard.. I know that. I'm tackling that as well as trying to lose weight. It won't be easy but I'm in this for the long run. I may hit bumps within the road but I'll try and prepare myself as much as possible. I have some nicotine patches in the cupboard which I'll use to help me at first. I can't wait for the day when I no longer crave a cigarette.. habits are hard to break, addiction isn't fun. But if I can do this I can learn to channel the psychological aspect of it elsewhere and find other ways to cope.

I know I can do this.

I've two packets of cigarettes left. I'm going to allow myself to smoke them and then the plan is to stop. I wish it was just that easy so it's going to take a lot of determination on my part.

I will try and find a home or purpose for the amount of money that shall be saved.

At the moment, the surplus money that I use for this habit is sat in my Monzo account. The current balance sits at £352.76. As well as funding my dirty habit, I use this account for other things that are not budgeted for a long the way, as the month goes on. It would be amazing to have a lump sum left at the end of the month to channel towards other savings.

As mentioned previously, my savings definately outweigh my debt but I choose to take advantage of the 0% offer whilst it lasts. I could also channel any extra funds towards paying this off.

I need to figure out what I want to actually do.

The first few days will be the hardest but once I get passed the first stage, hopefully the rest should fall into place.

All my other funds have their own purpose, I'm sure I'll figure something else out.

One option may be to increase payments towards my emergency fund- I currently allocate £100 towards that. The balance currently stands at £300.00. Another could be to add towards our holiday fund which we already have a lump sum saved.

The idea this year is to travel around some parts of Europe with the boy. I want to broaden his horizons and visit historical places and do things we wouldn't usually do.

There is a lot to think about.

Aside from that, today I have managed to purchase some tickets for my mum for her birthday, for a show she would like to see. £46.00 spent there but it's one less thing to do now. I used money from my birthday fund to pay for this so it now looks a lot emptied! The only other birthday I have this month is my friends and I need to have a good think about what I'd like to get her. I've a couple of weeks left before the occasion, so plenty of time to think about it.

That's pretty much it really.. I've wrote down everything I needed to get off my chest.

It's now time to figure out the plans.

Chandelier.

I thought I'd write a post about my decision to stop smoking. More to serve as a reminder of why I'm doing this.

There are many reasons why I have decided to quit smoking. The main reasons are for both my physical/ mental health and to save money. I've been wasting quite a lot of money on my 20 a day habit and it was eye watering totalling up the amount I was spending per month. This varied between £200-£250 per month. I found myself smoking more and more and using it as a crutch to deal with the daily stresses of life rather then facing problems head on. But I've finally decided that I can't carry on with this for reasons mentioned above and other smoking related implications.

I tended to use smoking as a form of escape from day to day life, as a relaxation method and as a reward to myself. It's silly really but it just became part of my routine both at home and at work. I'd have a cigarette with a coffee or go outside on my breaks at work. I'd substitute meal times to go and smoke and it wouldn't just be one cigarette, it would be one after the other. It sometimes felt as if I hadn't had enough of a nicotine hit. I was literally burning away money for no good reason.

There was no benefits to me smoking, I just carried on because it was what became the norm over the years.

I need to find and learn strategies/ways to deal with things and triggers now I've made the decision to quit. I'm sure there will be hurdles to be faced along the way but I'm confident I can do this. I'm more motivated then ever to do this and I'm ready for the challenge.

I've decided to use nicotine replacement therapy in the form of nicotine patches. I purchased these a while back and will now make use of them. I'll reevaluate where I am after a couple of weeks.

So my official quit date was 03/03/19. This date is close to the heart for me as it is the anniversary of my dads death. It just kind of made sense in some way to stop there and then.

I've let those closest to me know about my decision to quit and hopefully with the right support, I will stay on track. It doesn't help that my mum smokes so the temptation will always be there but I'm hoping in time that she will also make the decision to quit. Maybe if she sees how well I am doing it will motivate her.

I know the first 2/3 weeks will be the most critical but hopefully after this time has passed it will become easier. I'm just going to take each day as it comes and for now I'm just aiming to get through the first 72 hours. I want the nicotine out of my system. I am going to set small targets for myself a long the way.

The money pot I used to fund my smoking habit will now be used as my savings pot. The plan is to transfer the exact amount of money I spent each day on cigarettes into a seperate account and allow it to build up. I will use these funds to reward myself a long the way with things I'd like to buy and to fund other things such as days out. I think I will split the amount saved between treats for myself and put the rest towards further saving accounts for my future.

I've made a list of things I'd like to buy or do with the money saved. I thought I'd share a few of these things:

- A new perfume.
- An item of makeup.
- A new pair of shoes.
- A meal out at one of my favourite but pricey restaurants.
- A weekend away somewhere.
- A trip to London.
- Go camping.
- Have a spa day.
- Go on a day trip to Alton Towers.

I'm going to keep myself as busy as I can and avoid high risk situations where I'd be more likely to resist temptation. I'm aware that cravings will pass after 10/20 mins and I just need to keep this up and distract myself. I'm going to keep a close eye on what I'm eating and make sure I don't replace the cigarettes with other bad habits. Weight gain is the last thing I want. It's all about me taking back control.

I shall be focusing on self care along this journey to maintain my own health and wellbeing. I have the time to focus on this and make room for improvements which will benefit me in the long run.

I am going to celebrate the small victories and plan ahead for future milestones. I'm going to focus on the successes rather then the struggles that I may face.

In regards to stress management, I am going to find and learn about other coping techniques.This will be a big learning curve for me and hopefully will point me in the right directions when I am faced with problems or stress related situations in the future.

I need to remind myself of how strong I actually am and the reasons why I have decided to stop smoking once and for all. I don't want to let this addiction win and I need to gain back control. From now on, I am going to identify myself as a non-smoker because that is the ultimate aim. I think psychologically it will keep me on the right track the days pass.

Chandelier.

Evening,

After writing my previous post, I thought I mays well update on what I have been up to over the past couple of days.

We spent the rest of Saturday just chilling out and pottering around the house. The boy and I went to bed earlier then usual but we watched Matilda. The boy enjoyed the film and it was nice to have some time together.

On Sunday, I went to the boys ice skating where they were practicing their routines for the show this upcoming Saturday. The boy's dad phoned me to tell me he wasn't coming to watch the boy in his show as he has arranged a night out with his friends.. he clearly still hasn't his priorities straight but this doesn't surprise me. After spending around three hours at the ice arena, we walked home and then the boy went to his grandparents.

I then went to see man friend and we took a trip to Skipton where we had afternoon tea. The total spends were £18.00 and it was good value for money, we even took cake home with us. We both really enjoyed it and this was his first afternoon tea experience. We then went for a walk before heading home where we watched a couple of films together. I'm really enjoying spending my spare time with him and he makes me feel so good about myself. He's a positive addition to my life and there is no pressure with him. I've felt comfortable enough to share personal things with him and he seems supportive of myself and my situation. He is very understanding and I trust him. This is the first time in a long while that I've taken things slow with someone but it seems to be working out. I hope he sticks around.

I've had a review of last months finances from my surplus account to see where and what I spent my money on.

- Miscellaneous: £71.38. (This was made up of random trips to shops and buying things I didn't necessarily need or treating myself to items. Although it isn't a massive amount, there is room to cut back and make savings. I need to start buying only the things I need, not things that I want).

- Coffees: £10.65. (There were three occasions where I bought coffees whilst out and about. In future I'll plan ahead and make sure I have enough drinks with me).

- Car parking: £2.70. (This was for one trip into town. From now on I'll try to avoid paying for parking and look to find free parking and walk the extra distance).

- Cigarettes: £240.00. (I was smoking more then usual hence the expenses of this habit. As mentioned in previous posts, I have decided to quit so hopefully I'll save this amount per month. I was smoking roughly a packet a day at £8.70 per pack. Instead I am transferring this money to a seperate account which should hopefully build up as the month goes on).

My credit card still stands at £525.00. I have no plans as of yet for any overpayments but the direct debit of £30 is due to come out around the 21st of the month. The direct debit for my rewards CC has been paid in full and I'm just waiting for the recent transactions to show on my app and then I'll make sure all the funds to cover this are in a seperate account.

My entertainment budget still remains at £200.00. I'm possibly arranging for me and manfriend to meet up with a couple of my friends to go out for a meal later on in the week, so I'll set aside funds for that.

I've not much planned for the rest of the week as I want to take things easy. I'll go to the gym when I can and may consider attending some of the other classes.

I also need to get a new sick note and drop it off at work and arrange my next return to work meeting.

So that's pretty much it really for now.

Chandelier.

Morning,

It's quite a beautiful day here, the sun is shining and it's quite mild with just a slight breeze.

I didn't get to sleep until quite late last night and then a lot of my sleep was broken. I kept waking up and couldn't get back to sleep. I then woke pretty early this morning and just decided to get myself up. I've spent the morning catching up on some television programmes and chilling out.

I've decided to start counting up my NSDs again. I got into a habit of doing this a while back but fell off the wagon. In regards to my NSDs, these will not include expected spends such as food shopping, filling up with petrol, the boys ice skating etc. It will be the unexpected spends that are not budgeted for. I think I'm going to aim for 15 NSDs for March. Start off with something that's achievable and if I go over this target then even better.

NSD = No Spend Day.
SD = Spend Day.

So, so far this month my days have gone as follows:

01/03/19: SD. (£12 spent on car wash/vacuum and around £5 spent on drinks at the wedding, so around £17 in total).
02/03/19: SD. (I bought myself an additional drink whilst out for breakfast and some donuts for the boy. Total spends were less then £5).
03/03/19: SD. (We went for afternoon tea, total spend £18.00)
04/03/19: NSD. (I didn't leave the house yesterday or make any purchases.. my first one of the month,
yay!).

That brings me to a total of 1/15 NSDs. It could have been better and the little expenses do seem to add up. I'm going to try and be more mindful about what I do spend and when. In regards to the unexpected spends, I'm going to try wait out for things and allocate a day where I can spend money should I feel the need to do so.
This should hopefully boost up my numbers.

I have some cash leftover in my purse which I tend to use for small purchases when out and about. I try not to carry too much cash as I use my debit cards for most things and credit card for larger purchases. When I have money, I don't tend to keep a track of where my money goes.. at least with online banking I can see this.

Aside from my budgeted pots each month, I use three main accounts for other things.

My first direct account is my main account that all my bills come out of. I try not to use this account for anything else.

I then have a Halifax account which I use for the entertainment budget and I can see pending transactions straight away. I've kept this account open as I have a HTB Isa with Halifax and it's one of my longer standing current accounts. I check this regularly and keep track of what I spend as the month goes on. This funds all my days out/other entertainment purposes. I set a budget of £200.00 each month and what is leftover either gets rolled into next month or put into savings.

The third account I use is my Monzo account. This is for all other spending that I have not accounted for. Whatever surplus money I have each month, I put into here.I like the way it records my spends and updates the balance immediately. It makes it a lot easier to see where my money is going, rather then having to wait a couple of days for pending transactions to clear. I also like how it categorises each of your spends and breaks it down for you. The saving pots are coming in handy. I've set up a stop smoking pot which I'm transferring £8.70 into each day and I'll allow this to build up. I've set up another pot that will just round up my accounts to the nearest zero when I've spent money. So whatever pennies are leftover will be directed into here which should hopefully build up over time.

It's now Day 2 of me stopping smoking. I'm not really getting mega cravings for them, it's just the routine I'm just missing which will take me a while to get used to. I need to find things to do to fill my time and to distract myself.

I've got a couple of things I need to get done today.. the list isn't too big.

• Phone up about my repeat prescription.
• Get another sick note.
• Put ironing away.
• Do small food shop.
• Go to the gym.
• Take the boy to football.
• Arrange an evening out with my friend.

I'm sure there are other things that I will find to do. There is always something else.

So that is it for now .

I'm going to make some lunch and crack on with the rest of my day. I need to be productive and carry on doing what I'm doing.

Chandelier.

Morning,

It's been a bit of a weird morning, some parts were stressful and I ended up having a bit of a meltdown.

This is the point where I'd usually reach for a cigarette but I refused to as I've been doing so well. I'm onto Day 3 of stopping smoking. Another £8.70 has been added to the pot, giving me a grand total of £26.10 already. It is soon adding up. I can't believe how much money I've wasted. I'm still getting cravings and feeling more irritable then usual but I need to find other ways to cope.

The boy had a surprise assembly where he got an award for a reading challenge he completed. He was totally over the moon with himself. The reading challenge is where a parent goes in to read a book with a child on different topics each week. The boy seems to be enjoying it and is happy for me to join him. They have also started another new reading scheme which has meant the boy has been picking up more books at home which I'm glad of.

I've banned the games console for a couple of days due to a couple of reasons. One of the main ones is that the boy is becoming obsessed with Fortnite as all his friends play. I don't necessarily mind him playing it but he was trying to prioritise this over homework and other activities. So we are having a break.

Yesterday ended up being a NSD, bringing my total to 2/15 NSDs.

I did a small food shop which only came to £6.88 and was mostly for fresh items such as fruit, bread etc. If I need to nip back to the shops later in the week then that's okay. I'll just stick to a list.

The plan for this morning is to go to the gym and push myself a bit further in regards to my routine. I'm yet to weigh myself this week but I'm holding off for the next couple of days as I've decided I'm changing my weigh day to Friday. It makes more sense in some ways as I tend to treat myself on the weekend and behave during the week.

I have quite a few other bits that I want to get done today.

• Go to the gym.
• Put ironing away.
• Have porridge for breakfast.
• Pick up sick note and drop into work.
• Book a table for meal out Friday evening.
• Tidy bedroom.
• Wash makeup brushes.
• Take boy ice skating.
• Meals from stores.
• Eat some fruit.
• Put a wash load on.
• Pay for the boys school trip deposit.

Some of the things are just usual every day things but I have to remind myself for a lot of things so I like to see it written down.

I'm going to have a good sort out of my bedroom whilst I have the time and see what I can do with the space I've got. I need to find a home for a few items and it just needs a bit of organisation overall. I might have a read of Marie Kondo and use some of her advice/tips. I'm going to go through all of my clothes and see what may need replacing. I like to do this every so often. Whatever I need, I'll get when I next go shopping.

I might text one of the school mums about arranging a night out to bingo at some point. It will be good to have a catch up and I haven't been to bingo in a couple of years. I do find it quite fun and it's a bit different to my usual outings.

I'm still a bit apprehensive about joining any other gym classes just yet. I'm going to make the effort to go to the swim class again tomorrow and hopefully get into a routine of that each week. And then the other days just use the gym. I'm getting myself to go at least three times a week so I'm making good use of the price I pay for my membership. Although I'm still not the biggest lover of exercise, I'm slowly learning to enjoy it and hope I will see some good results as time goes on. Slow and steady wins the race.

All my budgets are still intact and I've been managing my finances well. I've paid for the boys childcare this morning which is all up to date. The only other budgeted expense is that I need to pay a deposit for a residential trip the boy shall be going on next school year. It's on a first come, first served basis and the payment window opens at 12pm so I'll make sure I get on it as soon as possible. I don't want him to miss out.

Hopefully today shall be another NSD as I don't actually need anything or want to buy anything. I'm trying to get in as many as possible. I've not used any of my debit cards in the past two days and haven't used cash for anything. I currently have £25.95 cash left in my purse which will just act as a emergency float/pay for small spends.

That's pretty much it for now really. I'll update later on how I've gone on with my to do list.

Homegrown0

You're doing great on the smoking from Chandelier - I hope having the money added to your pot will help to keep the motivation up. You can do it! My husband smoked 20 a day from about 10 years and when I was pregnant he quit and hasn't touched one since. It'll be 7 years this year

Great news about the boy getting recognition for reading - my two love reading (well, us reading to them since they're still young) and I'd love to keep that going.

The Fortnight thing scares me - my son knows about it and has seen one of his friends playing it but he is not allowed to play it. He's only 6 so I'm keeping that going as long as possible. The stories of kids getting addicted to it and bad behaviour when you restrict the game is enough to keep my mind firmly in the 'no' camp for now. It'll be harder to say no when he's older and all his friends are playing I'm sure. For now, we'll stick to Lego games!

Chandelier.

Afternoon,

Wow, nearly a week since I last posted. It's been pretty busy and spendy in some ways.!

On Friday, I went out for a meal with manfriend, my friend and her partner. I was a bit nervous about introducing him to them at first but I needn't have worried, it all went well. The conversation flowed and the food was good. However when it came to paying for the meal, my friends partner wouldn't let me pay our half towards it all so I've insisted I'll pay next time!

On Saturday, I took the boy out for breakfast. I say this but he had a dessert instead whilst I had something off the breakfast menu as he had already had his. We chilled out for a bit and then he had his ice skating show later on in the evening which went well. The boy did his own routine and absolutely smashed it!

On Sunday I met up with man friend for lunch whilst the boy was at his grandparents. We went to a tea shop which was lovely and not too expensive! I came away with a bag of loose tea that I was eager to try! The loose tea obsession is another topic.. Anyway the boy then had his auditions for this years upcoming ice skating show which he said went well so we are just waiting to hear back from them.

Yesterday was a write off day. I did absolutely nothing as I was so exhausted and worn down following the recent weeks events. I just needed a day to recharge my batteries.

My moods have been a bit all over the place over the past two weeks. Something triggered me off last Thursday and I found myself going manic and I could not stop this. I felt as if I was indestructible and my moods were so elevated. I was like a child having a sugar rush. This lasted a good few days until reality set in and I've been on a slight come down.
The thing is, I recognised I was high but there was nothing I could do to stop it. Nothing seemed to work, I just had to ride it out.. hence there being a couple of spendy days. The end result could have been much worse!

On a positive note, I am proud to say I have been 9 days smoke free! It hasn't been easy a long the way and I've had moments where I have really craved for a cigarette but I haven't given in. At first I was planning on using nicotine replacement therapy but after a few days I decided I wanted nicotine totally out my system so I went cold turkey. This might not be the best way for some but with me it's all or nothing. I've been putting the money aside in a seperate saving pot and so far I've saved up £78.30 which is an eye watering amount. That was based on smoking one packet a day, some days it could have been more. This is giving me the motivation to continue. I'll decide what to do with the money at the end of the month because for now I'm allowing it to grow. If I keep this up, I'll probably keep track for the first few months of what I'm saving until I'm able to find a purpose for the cash within my budgets.

As mentioned above, there have been a couple of spendy moments over the past week or so. Some of this occured was when I was rather manic and I became obsessed with something.

That something was loose tea- I know it sounds crazy. I ended up going to buy a new teapot especially for this along with several different types of tea. I also bought two different types of tea strainers because one was not enough. The final thing was I found some China mugs I liked. They had colourful polka dots on them and just seemed to attract my attention. I couldn't just buy four, I had to buy all eight incase some broke. My rationale for buying these was that they were for when I move out- I've no plans to move out yet haha! Anyway the total damage was around £40.. it could have been much worse. I did go buy a couple of other random things from the pound store that was not needed but I was in that set mind frame that I couldn't get out. I think I only spent around £4 there which isn't too bad considering. Overall I spent less then £50 whilst in a manic episode. It could have been much worse so I'm not going to beat myself up too much over it. I just now have lots of loose tea to drink as a result.. at least it's in a pretty tea pot.

I also treated myself to some new jewellery at the weekend. This was when I was in sensible mode and I had been looking at some alternative jewellery for a while. I picked up some different nose rings/studs to try out. I think the total spend there was £12. I then found an Easter egg that I liked for the boy which cost £3. That was me done by then, I knew I'd spent enough.

Albeit the spends mentioned above, I've been keeping track of my NSDs. I'm currently up to 5 NSDs so far this month bringing my total to 5/12 NSDs which I'm happy with. Long may it continue.

I've been keeping track of my Amex CC spends and ensuring all the funds are in the right place for when my next statement is ready and payments are due. I'm using this card to build up membership points which will go towards gift vouchers in the future. This card suits me for now but I may look into other cards in the future with other benefits/rewards. I have quite a hefty credit limit on this card which they have offered to double. I've declined as I've already got enough available credit across other cards and don't want it to affect any potential further lending, should I need it in the future.

Each of my credit cards have their own purpose. I need to use some of the others to make small transactions so they don't lie dormant and get closed. With some lenders I have longer history then others and these are what I'd like to keep open especially if they have ongoing offers which may be useful in the future. I've just recently asked for new CCs from some of the older accounts that I'm going to put aside to one place and keep them all together so I know where they are. I've also updated all my online banking details so I have the right information for each account.

For now, I haven't made any further payments to my FD CC. I'm waiting for the direct debit to come out which should be within the next 7 to 10 days. I'm unsure of the exact date. However I am allowing funds to build up within my accounts through coin sweeping and putting aside all the extra pennies to go towards debt repayments. It's soon adding up!

I've paid the £30 deposit for the boys residential trip which is in October. I've got until September to make the final payment which is £115.00. I'm going to spread the payments for this out over the next 5/6 months. I will most likely pay more some months then others it's doable and gives me some breathing space. I'm not asking the boy's dad to contribute as this will just cause further arguments.

There are a few things I'd like to get done this week but I'm just going to pace myself a bit and not rush things.

I've taken a couple of days break from the gym but I aim to get back into it from tomorrow. I cannot let old habits slip back in when I've been doing so well.

I may need to nip into town and find a present for my friends birthday which is next week. I have no idea what to get her as yet and shall need to brainstorm. I might look online for some ideas. She is quite hard to buy for to be honest and has a lot of things already. It's more of a token gift then anything but it still means something to me and it's the thought that counts. I hope to spend no more then £15.00.


That's pretty much it really. The boy's dad is taking him to watch a football match tonight. I'm off out to the cinema with manfriend but we are having dinner at mine, beforehand instead of spending money going out for tea. We seem to be on the same wave length and are just balancing things out.

I know it's a big update but that's pretty much it for where we are at

Chandelier.

Morning,

It's been yet another busy couple of days since my last post. I'm just doing what I need to do and I'm trying to get organised.

On Tuesday evening, I went to cinema with manfriend. HE bought the tickets which only cost £5 altogether due to the 2for1 offer. I bought the drinks/snacks from our local corner shop which came to £5.25. So overall not too bad spend wise! We watched the Green Book and it was really good. It isn't my usual type of film but I really enjoyed it.

Yesterday I went to a close family friends funeral which was sad but it was nice to have all the family together. I've decided I'm going to arrange a meal out for us all at some point and that I'm going to make more of an effort to visit them. It's just finding time.

Later, I had a good gander on the net and bought two mothers day gifts for the boy to give to his Nana and Nanny. They are more token gifts then anything and cost £7.98 in total.

I then decided to buy myself an adventure scrapbook like the one in the film, Up. I've always wanted one and found one at a price I was happy to pay. This was £10.99 in total. I'm not sure what adventures I'll put in there just yet but I'm sure I'll figure something out.

I then went for a meal with my friend and we kind of went all out on everything. My total spends came to £24- ouch. I really enjoyed myself though and the food was great so I'm not complaining. A lot of my socialisation happens around food. It's good food and good company which makes me happy.

I have £142 left in the entertainment budget to last me the rest of the month. I'm sure I can stretch this out. I just need to be more mindful now.

I'm now on day 11 of stopping smoking. I'm feeling pretty good and only have the odd craving here and there. I really want to keep it up. So far the money I've saved comes to £95.70. That has soon built up and is a heck of a lot of money to just smoke away.

I've had quite a productive morning so far.

I dropped the boy off at school and then went to the shops where I bought a mug for my friends birthday which is next week. I'm going to nip into town and see if I can find a candle she will like as she's really into them. So far I've spent £7 and my limit is £20.00. I'll park away from the centre and walk into town so I'm not paying for car parking.

Whilst out, I also bought my mum a mug for mothers day, more as just something small to open on the day. I've bought all the cards we need and the total spend for everything came to £12.00 which wasn't too bad. I've decided on the actual day I'm going to make my own version of afternoon tea for my mum and the boys Nanny. I'll bake my own scones and make sandwiches then I'll buy some small cakes to go on top. This will work out much cheaper then going out for it and it's more personal. I think it's a pretty good idea and rather MSE if I must say .

I had an appointment at the doctors today regarding something about the boy. The outcome is a referral has been done and we will go from there.

The diet and gym has gone out the window for this week with everything going on. I'll make a fresh start next week and get back into it.

I've spoken to my CPN and I've decided I'm going to come off one of my medications. It's known for weight gain and I've put on around 20lb since being on it which I'm obviously not happy about. I told her I'm happy to try an alternative and will discuss this at my next consultant appointment.

I'm also going to follow up on a few other health issues that have been bothering me for a while. It's more gaining clarity and understanding what's happening and I want to take back that control. I'm doing everything else that is expected, now its my turn to make the decisions and choices.

I've made an extra payment of £10 towards the debt bringing my balance to £515.00. Now it's just a waiting game for the direct debit to come out.

I've a few upcoming appointments in the next week or so. I need to put the money aside for one appointment and I'm due another health wellbeing meeting at work.

Aside from all above, everything is okay and ticking along as usual.

Chandelier.

Morning,

Yet more days have passed since I last updated. I really want to try a bit harder at posting a bit more regularly to keep me on track.

I've had a couple of spendy days yet again and really need to start knuckling down money wise. Sometimes I'm spending money on things I don't need. I need to stop all the unnecessary trips to the shops and only buy what is required.

I've also been going out a lot more recently, especially for food and it's all adding up. I haven't kept a close eye on things and I've not paid attention to what I'm actually spending when going out. I have £97.46 left in the entertainment budget for the rest of the month and I'm going to review what and where I've already spent this month as it seems to have disappeared rather quickly.

I'm now on Day 17 of no smoking and it seems to have passed by so quickly and I've had minimal cravings which is good. I'm still putting the money saved aside in a seperate account buy I might use this to balance out any other further spends I've had so far or will have this month. I shouldn't need much more now this next week or so but you never know.

I need to get out of the mindset that I'm treating myself. I've done enough of this over the past two months that I shouldn't need to for a while. I seemed to have developed this mentality which is new to me and I'd rather nip it in the bud and get it under control now rather then later.

I don't want to become obsessive over my money which I have done previously in the past but I need to sort myself out. I want to make my money work for me and save as much as I can whilst I can.

The next couple of months may be on a tighter budget then usual so I may have to mix things up a bit. I might phone payroll just to discuss what to expect pay wise this month. I was told I'd get full pay but I just want to double check to make sure so I can adapt things accordingly. If I am full pay then it will just be my basic and no enhancements which will make a slight difference.

I took out a new 0% CC last week which has 26 months on purchases. The reason I've done this is that I shall be planning our travels for the summer soon once I have confirmed my annual leave and I'll use this to cover the costs and for protection purposes. I have a lump sum of money saved for our holiday spends but I can feed this into a higher interest account whilst paying the minimum on the CC and pay the balance off before the end of the promo period. I got quite a high limit which I thought was unusual but it just gives me more breathing space. I've received the pin, I'm just waiting for the card now.

I was looking at my credit report last week and was totalling everything up. I have quite a large amount of credit available to me and I'm unsure whether to close a couple of accounts.. each one has it's own purpose. I haven't used a couple of them in a while so I may make a small purchase just to keep them active. It just gives me wider scope and options should I need them.

I have the following:

- 2x Travel Cards
- 3x Balance/Money transfer cards.
- 2x 0% Purchase cards.
- 1x Reward card.

I tend to manage them quite well and have low credit utilisation. I use my amex reward card for day to day expenses and have the small balance on one of my 0% cards. I intend to keep it this way.

It just feels like things are getting more expensive or that I'm doing more things. I might set myself a couple of challenges to keep myself busy for the rest of the month and hopefully be able to save some more money.

It's all about the money, money, money.

Chandelier.

I've totalled up my entertainment spends so far this month and it has surprised me a bit in some areas.

• Food: £71.59. (Far too much, I'm rather disgusted at this amount).
• Drinks: £17.95. (This includes drinks from a night out, £16 on cocktails, woops!)
  
• Cinema: £5.00. (I'm okay with this and will make sure I use 2for1 codes in future).
• Bingo: £7.00. (This was a one off. The main game was free, we just paid for some extras).

So as you can see my main area of spending money entertainment wise is on eating out at places. I'm going to try hard to really cut back and use whatever funds are left for days out with the boy. My socialising needs can be put to one side for the moment or I can just do things that are free.