Money Moral Dilemma: Should I let my mum keep my car?

DragonQ

I recently gave my dad my old car, which I've just replaced. Yeah I could've got £500 for it but he needed a car and knowing I've helped him out is much nicer than having £500 in my pocket that I don't have a particular need for.


I guess it depends on your relationship with your mum and whether the cash would actually make your life any better. However, if she's not going to be able to afford the balloon payment anyway then surely she'd be better off getting a cheaper car to begin with?

RockOnZombies

In all honesty I think the answer is to get rid of the car, you've offered reasonable alternatives that have been knocked back, basically sell it and pay off the PCP, give your mum £500 towards buying a cheap run around, they are out there and in my view the problem has been sorted and you've been as helpful as you can to family.

paul_k

Well
I guess good old Mum has kept you for many years,food on the table,a roof over your head?
AS long as your mum knows it costs money to keep the car on the road and accepts all costs,WELL give it to her with love.

solvent_saver

If Mum needs it for work, and you only want to sell it to have 'MORE money for living costs' and you earn much more than she does, it seems obvious. If Mum can't get to work, will you pay her living costs?

Red-Squirrel_2

paul_k wrote: »

Well
I guess good old Mum has kept you for many years,food on the table,a roof over your head?
AS long as your mum knows it costs money to keep the car on the road and accepts all costs,WELL give it to her with love.

Its not that simple, its on finance, the OP doesn't even own the car herself and will have to keep up the repayments!

Always best to read the full thread before replying.

Fireflyaway

I'd sell the car ( or voluntarily terminate the agreement if eligible) and buy something cheaper outright. An older car doesn't always mean it's an unreliable car.
That way you are free of the finance payments and your mum has a car.

Techno

There have been a huge amount of assumptions here mainly because there was not, initially enough information for an informed reply but also because not every mother is a saint who devotes her life to her children and therefore can never be repaid.

There are, of course, some mums like that; there are others who do a pretty amazing job most of the time and some who I would not allow to look after an animal let alone a child.

Back to the post. It would appear that mum is expecting the OP to continue the payments of £156 per month for the next year and possibly the insurance. It would also appear that mum is then going to make the final payment so the car is hers. So that is the equity in the car given to mum plus another circa £2000 the OP will be responsible for until then. That is a lot of money for someone just setting up on their own.

gettingtheresometime

I must admit I'm a little confused over dates - are you saying the plan is for you to move out in June 2019 but the car isn't paid off until March 2020 with the payments between Jun 19 - Mar 2020 being made by your mum?


Are you also saying (if I've read the situation right) that after March 2020 your mum would take out a loan and buy the car off you?


If this is right then I think I would put a halt on that plan - what would happen if the car needed an expensive repair shortly afterwards ? Would you be guilt tripped into helping to pay for the repairs?


It does sound at the moment your mum is sticking her head in the sand about her finances. Not sure before Christmas is the time to have that discussion with her but you & her need to have it soon afterwards!

AylesburyDuck

warwick46 wrote: »

She is your MOTHER. I repeat MOTHER!
You couldn't pay her back in a hundred years for all the things she has done for you.
Go out, buy her a bunch of flowers and give her the car.

Sorry to highlight your post, but it's a fine example of what i needed to highlight in this thread, but it's not specifically aimed at you but at the many.

Not all Mothers resemble Olivia from the Waltons, i've met some hideous mothers who day after day allow their children to go to school crawling in headlice, in desparate need of a shower and hungry.
I've met narcissist mothers who's children will never do enough to please them.
And i've met refrigerator mothers with not one jot of warmth in them, let alone a good word for their child.
To assume that any mother gets want she wants because basically "she's you mum" "you'll only have one mum" "you can never repay what she's done for you", just isnt a true assumption in this day and age or any other day and age come to that.

crmism

You haven't said how much you think the car is worth; all you've told us is that your mother is unable to buy it because she doesn't have the money. Knowing whether it's worth, say, £500 or £5,000 is a material factor.

I'm sure your mother will have done a lot for you over the years and never once sought recompense for the time, effort and money needed to raise you - so why not return the favour?

As you will be able to exist without a car in future, why don't you simply transfer it to your mother, who will be responsible for the maintenance, insurance, road tax and repairs in future? That way, your generous gift will be offset by the fact that you will be relieved of these expenses. You will then both win, won't you?