Severe longsightedness in daughter

MrBrindle

Our teacher noticed recently that our 4.5 year old daughter has been struggling to see a bit during school work.

So today we went for an appt, and discovered she is severely long sighted, 6 in one eye and 8 in another.

I cannot believe it, she has never complained to us about not being able to see something, or never exhibited any signs like a squint or lazy eye developing. She's never rubbed her eyes or has never looked like she's struggling to see. She does school work well too, like drawing letters, words, shapes etc. Just don't understand how they're so bad.

I don't wish to offend anyone who wears glasses, as a lot in our family do, but we're very upset tonight. Both of us have shed a few tears and my partner has had a panic attack after reading online that those numbers mean 'severely long sighted', and may not improve at all. I guess it just hurts that your child had something wrong with her. I know this problem may sound trivial to others.

We were hoping she may only need glasses for school work/watching tv etc, but the optician has said it's best if she can wear them all the time, to stand the best chance of improving the eyesight. And will probably need to wear them for the rest of her life.

Has anyone had any experience of this? Did the eyes improve at all? I don't know if it's a bit OTT, but we're both feeling extremely down, and very guilty that neither of us noticed anything wrong with her.

dawyldthing

Honestly it’s better she wears them. True story I remember being in school trying to see what was written on the projector and was forever asking people ‘can you tell me what it says’ until someone turned round one day and said to go to the opticians. I was 12 and have wore them since.

There’s nothing wrong with glasses. She probably wouldn’t know any different with being so little and kids adapt. It might improve (I went from needing glasses for reading in infant school to needing them for the board in secondary school).

Main thing is to remain positive, tell the lil one the positive side (or she’ll sense the negativity) and see how you go

Artytarty

No, I doubt they will improve but please don't feel so down.
I've worn glasses since I was 18 months old and a patch for a lazy eye for a while,
Changed to contacts in my teens and back to glasses after my children were born- my toddler son kep opening my les container, drinking th efluid and munching my lenses...!
Your daughters world is about to improve immensely.
Loads of kids wear glasses, she won't be picked on,
It's just a medical fact, not all eyeballs are perfect.

I have dodgy eyesight but it's good enough for me to drive .
My children all got specs in their teens but one had a period of selective blindness at nine, she could see but if she was put in front of a chart in a test situation, her brain turned off. Now that was scary, But was put down to stress and self resolved.
Dry your eyes, have a big hug together, I do understand it's a big shock, but it will be alright.

MrBrindle

Thanks for the replies both. Don't get me wrong, I want what's best for her, and the glasses will make her life easier so that's good with me. It was just very hard/strange seeing her trying them on today - even though she was very excited about the whole thing bless her.

jackomdj

My daughter has very bad vision too. We discovered hers a little earlier, just before her third birthday as she had a virus which effected a muscle in her eye, and overnight she developed a mayor squint. We were referred to the hospital, where they discovered her vision was very poor.

We were told they prefer children to wear glasses all the time as their eyes are not very good at continually adjusting. We were also told that they know no different, so they are very good at adapting to what they do see. Even now (she is 11) we don't know if she can actually see in 3D, as she can't see any of the 3D tests they do, however she is a good netball and tennis player.

Many children in your daughters class will have glasses, and these days they are quite trendy. Two things we did which you may want to think about, we paid extra to have reactor light glasses, that way she will still be able to see in the sunlight without having to continually change glasses/prescription sunglasses. Also our daughter swims and we bought prescription goggles, which improved her swimming dramatically as she could see where she was going.

We are at the next stage, she has her first contact lense appointment this weekend. Hopefully to help her with her sport.

So dry your eyes, you have not done anything wrong. Your daughter has had it recognised early and will have regular check ups. Glasses will change her life and enable her to reach her full potential.

BornThrifty

There's always laser eye surgery for later in life, anyway

elsien

Took my parents till I was 10 to notice even though I had a squint, so you're well ahead of the game. They said later they always wondered why I was so useless at ball games and now they know.


It does seem a little bit of a strong reaction to a kid having to wear glasses which really isn't the end of the world.

bambinaUK

I can tell you my experience from two points of view.
I was diagnosed with severe longsighted in both eyes at the age of 6. I also had a lazy eye which required patching. My mum really wasn't very vigilant when it came to checking I was either wearing my glasses or sneakily lifting the corner of the patches. As I went into my teens I refused to wear my glasses, Consequences were that I have barely any vision left in one eye and can just about see to read in my other.


My daughter has exactly the same vision problem and has worn glasses since she was 4 months old. She has always loved her glasses, it become a yearly treat to get new frames! Her vision will never improve, but neither has it gotten any worse. She is now 24 and isn't interested in having her eyes lazered, she says that her glasses are now part of her face!!!



I understand you are shocked, I was upset for my daughter, but it also made me all the more determined that she would keep her sight.

Savvy_Sue

The thing is, your DD has never known what the world SHOULD look like, so whatever she's been able to see has been 'normal'. She probably will be VERY excited when she first starts to see what she's been missing!

one of my friends said that she was getting on just fine, and her parents only realised there might a problem when they noticed that every time she wanted to see the time she'd get up and walk around the kitchen table to peer at the clock at very close range. She says she could barely see the blackboard from the front row of her class, but thought that was the same for everyone.

Davesnave

elsien wrote: »

Took my parents till I was 10 to notice even though I had a squint, so you're well ahead of the game. They said later they always wondered why I was so useless at ball games and now they know.

When our younger daughter was still a baby we noticed something wasn't right. Our first was one of those horribly smart kids, so it was very apparent that something was amiss. Books and anything with detail was ignored.

We investigated and discovered she was looking at a very fuzzy world. When specs were prescribed, I wondered if a child of 18months would tolerate them, but I needn't have worried!

There were consequences; lots of them. Severe dyslexia and clumsiness was to come, plus the squint, which is something I had too with my long sight.

It's too soon for the OP to predict what lies further down the road. It's probably nothing serious if their DD has reached 4.5 without this coming to light. However, really poor eyesight can lead to issues which take many years to resolve, because lost early experiences can't be replaced, just compensated for.

Our daughter had two decades of difficulty and educational frustration, thanks to the special way she sees the world, but art college was a game-changer. She now feels her specs are part of her as much as the squint, which she won't be correcting.


Whatever doesn't kill you....etc etc.

GlasweJen

Please don't let your daughter see you cry or see your partner having a panic attack (really?).

Keep the glasses on her morning to night. How would you like it if someone let you see for parts of the day then made you walk about in a fog for the rest of it? With her sort of prescription it's bordering on child abuse to not allow her to keep her glasses on just because your partner can't handle a pair of glasses.

None of this is the end of the world. Her numbers might come down, they might go up. None of it matters, as long as it keeps correcting with glasses she'll be fine.