Why wills are rubbish

unholyangel

Keep_pedalling wrote: »

Mirror wills are fine and dandy for people like us, who have only been married once, but for more complex situations like your mother and step father were in then they are not sufficient, you need to build in things like life interest trusts so the interests of both sets of children.

The issue with your FIL is nothing to do with the will but the disfunctional family issues.

Yes fine and dandy, providing you never get involved with another person and don't make any changes. As we've seen time & time again on here, people go back on those promises despite obviously being trusted by their partners to do the right thing.

Mutual wills offer more assurances but again comes with a massive drawback.

pattycake

troubleinparadise wrote: »

And just how will your friend achieve that?

March an adult with capacity to a solicitor, then tell the solicitor what he wants changing, and it’ll all work out as you’d like?

You should lose a little sleep over the fact that you have not ensured what you would like for your own children actually happens. However lovely, honest and loyal your husband is, life events can change circumstances so that the best of intentions cannot be achieved.

Perhaps take some legal advice to see if there is a better way you can achieve your wishes rather than just crossed fingers.

Perhaps naively, i do trust my husband to do the right thing. We have been married for nearly 50 years and I honestly cannot see that he would see our children and grandchildren deprived of what we have worked long and hard for.

On a lighter note, he says he would marry the friend in question himself! She has no children and is the least mercenary person you could ever wish to meet.

I hope we still have many happy and healthy years ahead of us and that we will actually spend some of our wealth on ourselves. I don’t mean on care either but if that happens, I would want the best that can be achieved with our money. Our children have good careers and I know they would want that for us too.

Mojisola

pattycake wrote: »

Perhaps naively, i do trust my husband to do the right thing.

We also have mirror wills but I'm aware of cases where the widow/er remarried and didn't get round to writing a new will and died so everything was inherited by the surviving second spouse.

There's also the possibility that a second spouse may dispose of a will that leaves money to the children of the first marriage in order to benefit from the intestacy rules.

Difficult, isn't it?

Yorkshireman99

Mojisola wrote: »

We also have mirror wills but I'm aware of cases where the widow/er remarried and didn't get round to writing a new will and died so everything was inherited by the surviving second spouse.

There's also the possibility that a second spouse may dispose of a will that leaves money to the children of the first marriage in order to benefit from the intestacy rules.

Difficult, isn't it?

What is the position with mutual wills? Not my field but is this a way of preventing the situation described above and what happens if there is a second marriage after the original spouse dies? Just curious.

Mojisola

Yorkshireman99 wrote: »

What is the position with mutual wills? Not my field but is this a way of preventing the situation described above and what happens if there is a second marriage after the original spouse dies? Just curious.

There aren't many made these days - too many ended up in court.

If the survivor's circumstances change in ways that may not have been thought of when the will was made, courts can change them.

A mutual will can leave a widow/er from a second marriage without any financial support so again the case may end up in court.

The more usual route now is to own property as tenants in common so that a life interest can be given to the surviving spouse but the children's inheritance is secured.

pollypenny

We've made will, putting the house etc in trust, with the proviso that the survivor can utilise it unless he/she remarries or cohabits.

I don't want any fancy woman blowing my hard earned pounds.

Yorkshireman99

Mojisola wrote: »

There aren't many made these days - too many ended up in court.

If the survivor's circumstances change in ways that may not have been thought of when the will was made, courts can change them.

A mutual will can leave a widow/er from a second marriage without any financial support so again the case may end up in court.

The more usual route now is to own property as tenants in common so that a life interest can be given to the surviving spouse but the children's inheritance is secured.

Many thanks. Sounds much better and more flexible.proving cohabiting could be problematic.

PasturesNew

SevenOfNine wrote: »

...a will can be stored ....

But it's not compulsory/well known ... so you'd need to know about it to put it there - and, most people would think "why put it there when I can have it right here", so it doesn't make sense for most.

Then any relative would need to know about that system and look. Unlikely if very few people have ever heard of it.

SevenOfNine wrote: »

I'm afraid your father signed a will he had not read.

Yes, from a generation where they "trusted professionals". Trouble is, if somebody doesn't read it, or read it properly (and with mirror wills that's quite easily done when you're getting on quite a bit too ... and have gone to a proper solicitor... but the thing is nobody finds out there's a problem until after the Will maker's died.

The system ... is quite flawed in a lot of ways.

For "the little people" ... even if you pay and trust it's right ... and are confused and just trust the solicitor (who does this every day) .... mistakes are made far too often.

In our case, I COULD ... have fought off one claimant with an intestate will.... I could have just gone "HA! HA!" ... but we're normal/reasonable people in our family who knew what the Will meant and what was intended and had no wish to change any of that when it was declared as part intestate.

Mojisola

PasturesNew wrote: »

Yes, from a generation where they "trusted professionals". Trouble is, if somebody doesn't read it, or read it properly (and with mirror wills that's quite easily done when you're getting on quite a bit too ... and have gone to a proper solicitor... but the thing is nobody finds out there's a problem until after the Will maker's died.

My parents went through their wills carefully and corrected all mistakes and then went into the solicitor's office to sign the wills - they were presented with the very impressive documents, open at the last page and duly signed them.

It was only years later, fortunately before they died, that we saw copies and realised that Mum had been given Dad's will and vice versa!

izoomzoom

WELLSIANA1962 wrote: »

It is normally time for Martin to promote "WILL WEEK" so although i have many instances here is two for you to ponder why wills are a waste of time and money which are actually connected to me .
1 ....
2 . My wifes Dad left a will when he died almost 3 years ago , naming all 4 of his children as executors and basically to sell up and divide equal , going well so far , until the two oldest decided to lock the will inside the cabinet in the house , change the locks and keys , put his daughter into the house to pay rent to cover another siblings costs and scrub the will or probate , 3 years in an unmarked grave for that will dear boy , and one daughter does not even have a key to the house she basically quarter owns .
So wills are a pathetic excuse for peace of mind in life , but in death where there is a will there will be a war , and no law will bother with the dead , so spend your money as someone else will.

Why not apply for Letters of Administration and kick start the kicking out part ... costly, but same result will eventually prevail!