Ex girlfriend says I owe her money

Malthusian

BrassicWoman wrote: »

Also who wants dissembled furniture on their doorstep? That’s an anger provoking offer.

No, it's a more than reasonable one. The OP went above and beyond by offering to deliver it to them, rather than leaving it outside his house for the ex to collect. I assume it needed to be disassembled to move it.

The OP should write to the ex (not the mother, as it's none of her business) stating that she has 14 days to collect her furniture, which he will leave outside the house on a date convenient to her, and if she does not collect it within 14 days he will take it to the tip. And then follow through this time. He should ask the Post Office for proof of posting.

Comms69

Malthusian wrote: »

No, it's a more than reasonable one. The OP went above and beyond by offering to deliver it to them, rather than leaving it outside his house for the ex to collect. I assume it needed to be disassembled to move it.

The OP should write to the ex (not the mother, as it's none of her business) stating that she has 14 days to collect her furniture, which he will leave outside the house on a date convenient to her, and if she does not collect it within 14 days he will take it to the tip. And then follow through this time. He should ask the Post Office for proof of posting.

To be honest it's not even necessary anymore. It's been 3 months.




Op has evidence of this: The day after I believe I received a email from my ex stating I have no right to contact any of her friends/family and not to turn up to their houses and if it continues she would file harassment with the police.


I would just ignore it now and if it gets to court the OP can show they tried to sort civilly.

AnnonK

Hi everybody!
Just want to say thank you all for your responses and your opinions on this situation, I have been in touch with citizens advice again today and they have basically said that as I followed what they advised previously I haven’t done anything wrong and as far as her mother turning up at my house and the possibility that they attempted to follow me and ambush me last night that I can look into a claim of harassment myself.

Because she’s shown no intent to want the furniture and that I was given different options by the police in which one would of lead to possible theft I have done no wrong in keeping the furniture at mine as to of dispose of it would of been classed as damaging someone else’s property and leaving it outside for anyone to take would of been classed as theft.

Will keep you all posted over the next few days but I would like to continue to hear your thoughts on all this drama...

Thanks again for taking the time with my post

-taff

Send the letter as above. Or ask a solicitor to send it. Cheaper to pay them to do it then you know the furniture question will be resolved within two weeks.

Stoke

I think I'd just be ignoring this rubbish now. Wait for the knock from whoever..... If she gets a solicitor involved, you compile proof of what's what.

Her mum getting involved muddies the situation, but happened with my ex also. Not an easy situation to resolve because obviously, most people develop a deep respect for their partners parents and I was now having to throw this away and put on the boxing gloves as she tried desperately to stitch me up.

You'll be fine mate, just don't do anything that they can stitch you up for. People can be truly evil at times.

TBagpuss

I agree. At this stage, I would suggest that you log with the police that her mother came to the house and ask them to make a note of it in case the harassment escalates. Explain that you had previous issues 3 months ago.
I also think you would be fine to ignore her other than that, but if you wish, you could send a final letter to your ex.

Keep it very polite.
State:
1. That you are only contacting her as her mother showed up at your home, and claimed to be speaking on her behalf.

2. That you do not owe her any money and will regard further allegations that you do as harassment.

3. That you made clear at the time of the split that you were happy for her to keep all of the items which she purchased, and that she chose to abandon them. State that, as you made clear at the time, you have no interest in buying the items from her, and will not be paying her anything for them.

4. State that, despite that fact that she has previously refused to collect her items or to agree to you delivering them, and therefore , given the time that has passed, you consider her to have abandoned them and made clear that she has no further interest in them, you remain willing for her to have the items which she paid for (list them) and can make them available for her to collect at a mutually convenient time within the next 28 days. (or if you want, you can offer to deliver them, although personally I wouldn't, as then you run the risk of her claiming you failed to deliver all the pieces, or they were damaged)

5. State that if she does want any of the items back, she needs to confirm this to you, in writing, within the next 28 days and if she does not, you will conclude that she has no further interest in the items and will consider yourself free to dispose of them if you wish., and that you will not enter into any further communications after that time.

Keep a copy of the letter and get proof of posting.

Stoke

Also.... and I know this is really hard, and I struggled with it..... Block them.

Block her and her mum off:
SMS, Phone Call, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, Tinder, Bumble, Fumble, Google Plus, bloody MySpace, whatever the other ones are called etc. By all means send the formal letter and ensure you keep a copy and send via recorded delivery, but get rid of the instant messaging stuff. It gives her an access point to you.

unholyangel

BrassicWoman wrote: »

you did change the locks, didn't you?


at the end of the rental period, move house and don't tell her where you went.


wait and see if they go to court. People who are really going to do that, tend to just do it, not whinge about doing it.

What happens if shes loopy enough to actually file against the OP? OP will then end up with a default judgement because it will have been sent to his old address.

Comms69 wrote: »

To be honest it's not even necessary anymore. It's been 3 months.




Op has evidence of this: The day after I believe I received a email from my ex stating I have no right to contact any of her friends/family and not to turn up to their houses and if it continues she would file harassment with the police.


I would just ignore it now and if it gets to court the OP can show they tried to sort civilly.

Its the procedure for bailed goods. You're supposed to write to them twice including certain info (such as your name, address, if any money is owed for the goods, that the goods will be disposed of/sold if not collected etc). The two notices can be sent at the same time unless money is owed, then (if memory serves) there needs to be 2 months between notices.

Comms69

unholyangel wrote: »

What happens if shes loopy enough to actually file against the OP? OP will then end up with a default judgement because it will have been sent to his old address.



Its the procedure for bailed goods. You're supposed to write to them twice including certain info (such as your name, address, if any money is owed for the goods, that the goods will be disposed of/sold if not collected etc). The two notices can be sent at the same time unless money is owed, then (if memory serves) there needs to be 2 months between notices.

I'm quite familiar with the Interference with goods act; I don't remember there being such a stringent procedure; atleast for private individuals.


Granted most scenarios im familiar with are tenants leaving property behind, so the LL doesn't have an address to send notice to.

gilett

Why don't you just turn the tables on her and tell her you'll have a case against her for harassment if she doesn't stop sending her family to your house?

Tell her to go to court of she wants money & if anyone else shows up you'll start proceedings yourself.


Job done.