My DS is in trouble at school

mae

Re:the friends issue do the school do a mentoring system where older children mentor the younger ones? This may help??

Also ask if there is a Learning Mentor member of staff at the school. These are employed particularly to help children who are struggling with school for many different reasons and they also help with 'gifted' children who can become disruptive if they are bored and their abilities are not recognised. She may just be able to spend some one to one time with him and observe his behaviour in class and then develop a plan of action that can be implemented in school and at home.

If the school continue to punish him by putting him down in his sets then I would consider moving schools but only as a last resort.

Good luck

Kimitatsu

Angie

He is a bright boy and he is bored! My son was just the same he is now 10 and in his optional SATS last year he scored 5's for primary he cant get any higher!!

At his previous school he was forever in trouble, wouldnt sit dowm always fidgeting, had a group of friends that came and went and came again. We had to move school due to relocating and you would not think he is the same boy! Thankfully this school realises that an idle none stimulated none motivated boy is a boy that can be disruptive and mischievous. That is not to say he is an angel now but he is happy content and being stretched to achieve what he can do rather than like your son being made to feel stupid becuase he is bored with what they are doing in the class.

I went through the whole lot with the previous school, I even had him tested privately by an ed psych for ADHD - she couldnt for the life of her work out why on earth they were worried. Boys at that age have just had an influx of hormones which means that they want to be on the move all of the time just as our education system wants them to sit down more, with carpet time and colouring in.

If he is that unhappy is there another school you could look at? No matter how wonderful the school if he is not happy then he will not learn. Not to mention how stressful all of this is for you! As a mum we all want our babies to be happy and it breaks our heart to see them unhappy. Why dont you ask him what he would like to do, if possible go and see some other schools and take him with you, in my experience children usually know where they would be happy.

HTH and remember whatever anyone else says he is perfect as he is!

angie_baby

MaureenHB wrote: »

Can you clarify what you mean when you say your son scored 9? I work in an Infant school and am not aware of a grade for Foundation stage children, other than the profile which gives equal weighting to many different areas and have not heard of parents being given an overall "score" before. Was this in one area of the 6 areas of learning?
I really agree with the posters who have suggested inviting children home to play, even if you are a working parent it is incredibly valuable to make the time to help your child with his social life. Is he your only child?

Hi, At the end of last term (reception class) all parents were issued a report, as usual. There was also a form with marks from 1-9. His old teacher explained that 6 or 7 was average. I dont know what it was called. Will have a search through his paper work later.My son goes to the childminders Mon - Fri and is very happy there will three other children. I also have no problems at home where we live. I must harder to have school friends round for him though

angie_baby

mae wrote: »

Re:the friends issue do the school do a mentoring system where older children mentor the younger ones? This may help??

Also ask if there is a Learning Mentor member of staff at the school. These are employed particularly to help children who are struggling with school for many different reasons and they also help with 'gifted' children who can become disruptive if they are bored and their abilities are not recognised. She may just be able to spend some one to one time with him and observe his behaviour in class and then develop a plan of action that can be implemented in school and at home.

If the school continue to punish him by putting him down in his sets then I would consider moving schools but only as a last resort.

Good luck

Thanks for that. Will ask the school about the learning monitor. He really likes one on one, i think mainly cause it's just him and me. He does need to work on being part of a team more. I have tried beavers, but he cant join until he's six.

dangers

Big hugs to you.
We had to have a home/school diary last year when my son was in Yr 1. We only needed it for a few weeks - he liked being rewarded with a sticker from his class teacher when he managed to get 5 smiley faces.
What is his behaviour like with the childminder? Has she noticed any change in him?
Good luck.

angie_baby

Kimitatsu wrote: »

Angie

He is a bright boy and he is bored! My son was just the same he is now 10 and in his optional SATS last year he scored 5's for primary he cant get any higher!!

At his previous school he was forever in trouble, wouldnt sit dowm always fidgeting, had a group of friends that came and went and came again. We had to move school due to relocating and you would not think he is the same boy! Thankfully this school realises that an idle none stimulated none motivated boy is a boy that can be disruptive and mischievous. That is not to say he is an angel now but he is happy content and being stretched to achieve what he can do rather than like your son being made to feel stupid becuase he is bored with what they are doing in the class.

I went through the whole lot with the previous school, I even had him tested privately by an ed psych for ADHD - she couldnt for the life of her work out why on earth they were worried. Boys at that age have just had an influx of hormones which means that they want to be on the move all of the time just as our education system wants them to sit down more, with carpet time and colouring in.

If he is that unhappy is there another school you could look at? No matter how wonderful the school if he is not happy then he will not learn. Not to mention how stressful all of this is for you! As a mum we all want our babies to be happy and it breaks our heart to see them unhappy. Why dont you ask him what he would like to do, if possible go and see some other schools and take him with you, in my experience children usually know where they would be happy.

HTH and remember whatever anyone else says he is perfect as he is!

Thanks, your post made me smile, i could have written part of that. I have looked at other schools, the schools are all really the same around here. I have even hought about trying to move, but cant afford to drop the London wage. I have thought about getting him tested for ADHD too, and private school, anything to make his life better. I just cant afford too.

angie_baby

dangers wrote: »

Big hugs to you.
We had to have a home/school diary last year when my son was in Yr 1. We only needed it for a few weeks - he liked being rewarded with a sticker from his class teacher when he managed to get 5 smiley faces.
What is his behaviour like with the childminder? Has she noticed any change in him?
Good luck.

Hi, Thanks for your post, the button isnt working again. He too loves the sticker rewards, and his behavour is fine at the childminders, she has noticed no change with her, happy as anything, infact there are usually tears when he has to leave. He loves playing with the two boys.She has at school though, he is a little more wary of other people now.

roxalana

Hi Angie,

It sounds like youre doing a great job with your number and other work with your son. The learning mentor idea sounds good or if they can 'buddy' him with another child, whilst you are waiting for the beavers group.

With my friends son, we played schools so that he could practise concentrating on school type work - the problem was weaning him off the one-to-one attention he was used to when he did sums at home!

mae

I doubt he has ADHD if he can behave for your childminder with other children present too and he also behaves for you? Although I am no expert in this area so just an observation.

angie_baby

mae wrote: »

I doubt he has ADHD if he can behave for your childminder with other children present too and he also behaves for you? Although I am no expert in this area so just an observation.

I dont think he does either, its just one of the million thoughts i have about all. And yes, he is good with me and grandad its just the school side, which is a big part of his life which is why im finding it so stressful.