Paying for 25 year old child

foolofbeans

I have a child at university. Due to various issues (not particularly their fault) they started university a bit later and will soon be 25.
We have been submitting our income details to student finance and due to our income level our child's student loan amount is reduced. I found out recently that once a student is 25 they automatically qualify as an independent student and their loan amount is calculated on their income, not their parents.
Sadly it turns out that child turns 25 one week after the qualifying date and so we will have to declare our income to student finance again.
Here is my dilemma.....
We have a good income but we also have a lot of debt and live in one of the most expensive parts of the country. I have always told the children we would support them while they are in education and I guess the government expects that we will contribute the reduced amount of student loan.
But frankly I really begrudge having to subsidise a 25 year old. I feel like we have assisted a lot already and it has impacted on the things we can afford for our other children and I was hoping we were done with it.
They have worked throughout university and have worked hard during summer holidays. However, child has also managed to have a holiday every year, attend festivals and regularly buy stuff.

I am really torn .... I'm considering telling my child we can no longer financially assist but that may cause them hardship. There is an expectation from the govt that we will assist but should a parent have to fund a 25 year old.

I'd love to hear some views on how we should approach this.

[purplesignup][/purplesignup]

marliepanda

Many MANY students manage perfectly fine with their loans and a part time job. No reason why your adult offspring can’t do the same.

They may not be able to afford a holiday and festivals. This is not ‘hardhip’

itsanne

How much longer does s/he have to go? As you'd previously said you would provide support, if there's just another year left maybe you could continue? However long is still to go, withdrawing support now isn't giving any warning. Perhaps s/he wouldn't have gone on holiday or to festivals this summer s/he'd been aware that your money wouldn't be available. If there's more than another year, saying that this is the last year you'll provide support seems fairer than suddenly withdrawing it.

Ultimately, as marliepanda says, many students manage fine without financial support from their parents, so if you decide enough is enough there's no reason why your offspring shouldn't manage equally well.


Having been there with a child who took longer to complete what was already a long course (because of illness), I understand your point of view. Just be warned: the bank of mum and dad doesn't necessarily have an end date in sight ...

silvercar

The time for a discussion on what support you would give your offspring was before the course started. To pull the rug from under them part way through the course is unfair.

trailingspouse

From what you say, you've already committed to supporting your child through university. But now you've changed your mind. There is also an expectation from the government, presumably due to your income level, that you will support them.


So, support them.


'we also have a lot of debt and live in one of the most expensive parts of the country'. A totally different issue.

JReacher1

As your child started university late for reasons you say are not their fault and you agreed to provide some financial support it seems heartless just before they go back to university to pull your financial support.

At the end of the day it is not your child’s fault that their student loan is calculated based on your earnings and your earnings are high enough that it means he is eligible for a reduced student loan!

meer53

You say you have a good income so you do have the money to support your child, Post an SOA on the DFW board to see where you can cut costs to reduce your outgoings. You can still reduce debt and make better budgeting choices to help them.

theoretica

I agree with itsanne - withdrawing support without warning is very hard, how are they supposed to budget? Tell them now what will happen when they graduate.

BeckyAP

If they are 25 before the start of their second year, they become independent of you for their 2nd/3rd year and will recieve full financial support from Student Finance.
Could they managed on the minimum loan (circa. £4k) and a part time job for one year?

System

You have two options:


1) Convince 25 year old to get a job whilst at university to subsidise income.
2) Get child to officially disown you. Then they can be classed as independant.



And for future reference, get child to work like mad in the summer leading up to uni to put enough away for the year.

elsien

Have you had any conversation with them at all about money/holidays/festivals? Could you discuss paying them a bit less and they need to fund the extras themselves? Do they know about your debt or do they think everything is fine?