Adult Autism Diagnosis?

dreaming

CRANKY40 wrote: »

P.S. I was diagnosed aged 5. The doctor then prescribed valium for me (I was very hyperactive and never slept - and I mean never). .

My DD also hardly slept as a child. Was quite a problem when they were actually a baby as I was also suffering PND and had no family around to help. Once she could walk and talk, which she did by 12 months old, it was a little better, then once she could read (aged 2) she would amuse herself quite happily but still didn't sleep for more than about 4 hours at a time. She still doesn't sleep much - but when she does she is completely unconscious and I'm not sure anything would wake her. Looking back I can see that in a way, her ability to amuse herself at an early age, and her various obsessions over the years, were probably indicators of ASD but I don't remember autism being spoken of except for people with serious behavioural problems.

Smodlet

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

Mind you, extracting any useful information from any of them was another matter. I'm sure they all picked up cues from DS1.

"Where are you going?" "Out."

"When will you be back?" "Later."

"Who will you be with?" "People."

"What will you be doing?" "Stuff."

That just sounds like a typical teenager to me, SS...

Fireflyaway

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

Flippin' 'eck! As a manager, you can't go around accusing people of lying! You HAVE to accept they are telling the truth, if they are not they will trip themselves up soon enough! You can ask questions to encourage them to do that (trip themselves up), but you have to take their answers at face value. As elsien says ...

Yup. Return to work interviews with my manager are usually a hoot:

Manager: what was wrong? Me: I had a sore throat and cough, it led to a chest infection, the GP gave me a fit note (and sometimes antibiotics).

Manager: Is this likely to recur? Me: Yes.

Manager: Is there anything we can do to prevent this happening again? Me: No.

Manager: Is there anything YOU can do to prevent this happening again. Me: No.

:rotfl: I know, I had to train all the boys (once they were teenagers) to TELL us when they were going out, and pop their heads round the door to say they were home. Otherwise I'd go upstairs and find one NOT surgically attached to his computer, and I'd be going "Where's Fred?" Or they'd have been out, and I'd come up and find them as above, and not realise they'd got back.

It just seemed like a basic courtesy to me, to let others know when you went out and came in.

Mind you, extracting any useful information from any of them was another matter. I'm sure they all picked up cues from DS1.

"Where are you going?" "Out."

"When will you be back?" "Later."

"Who will you be with?" "People."

"What will you be doing?" "Stuff."

Because DS1 is 'rules-based', we now have a good one, that he will let me have his flight details (he's long-term travelling) whenever he books one. He also lets me know which SIM he's using.

I do think I did the correct thing. I assumed the person was being honest and I followed the absence policy. My manager didnt like that I was using my discretion at certain points ( which I was within my rights to do) and was convinced my staff member was lying ( even though she had no proof). I think my manager was just a bully but it did make me question myself. They went over my head and fired the person with the absence issue and I really thought that was wrong.
What I have learned is sitting in an office with people all day is not for me. I'm happiest being out and about. So if the bad experience hadn't happened it would have taken longer for me to realise.

cannyshopper_2

Just seen this thread & it resonates with me too. I score highly on the self-diagnosis tests too. ("I always knew I was different")
I'm now 64 and although I'd like an official diagnosis I really don't think there is much point at my age. I just have to live with a meagre pension - the consequences of a chequered employment history in an attempt to find somewhere where I fitted in better, and not being able to deal with office politics. Chronic underachiever, me.

Now if the govt would backdate a claim for disability, or let me claim for disability discrimination going back 40 years, that would be a different matter lol

My children and my mother just wouldn't understand if I told them the real reason why I hardly ever see them.

Smodlet

cannyshopper wrote: »

Just seen this thread & it resonates with me too. I score highly on the self-diagnosis tests too. ("I always knew I was different")
I'm now 64 and although I'd like an official diagnosis I really don't think there is much point at my age. I just have to live with a meagre pension - the consequences of a chequered employment history in an attempt to find somewhere where I fitted in better, and not being able to deal with office politics. Chronic underachiever, me.

Now if the govt would backdate a claim for disability, or let me claim for disability discrimination going back 40 years, that would be a different matter lol

My children and my mother just wouldn't understand if I told them the real reason why I hardly ever see them.

I had never thought of my checkered employment history in those terms until I read your post, cannyshopper but it resonates with me. I think I just had less and less patience with all the pathetic pettiness and "pink fluffiness" BS that was expected rather than getting on with the job. I wanted to get the work done without having to tread on eggshells around the feelings of people who were, frankly, somewhere between lazy and useless. Guess it pays to be so, so long as you make the right noises at the right times.

Fireflyaway

Doing the right thing and being kind is really important to me. I've seen so many people be nasty behind people's backs. So many people be two faced or lie to get ahead. I just can't and won't do it. I don't think that's an Autism thing, just a point I wanted to mention.
Being in management was tricky as I always try to wait for people to finish speaking in meetings before saying anything. By that time someone else would have started speaking and id not get a say! I was also criticized for my poor decision making. I can make decisions it just takes a bit more time. If I did have a diagnosis i don't think I'd want to mention it for fear of discrimination.

AylesburyDuck

Fireflyaway wrote: »

Doing the right thing and being kind is really important to me. I've seen so many people be nasty behind people's backs. So many people be two faced or lie to get ahead. I just can't and won't do it. I don't think that's an Autism thing, just a point I wanted to mention.
Being in management was tricky as I always try to wait for people to finish speaking in meetings before saying anything. By that time someone else would have started speaking and id not get a say! I was also criticized for my poor decision making. I can make decisions it just takes a bit more time. If I did have a diagnosis i don't think I'd want to mention it for fear of discrimination.

And yet strangely if you did have a diagnosis you'd be better empowered to deal with that discrimination.

suki1964

fibonarchie wrote: »

Could also be a personality disorder. OP might not get the diagnosis he/she would like, and seems to think is the correct one.

I was originally diagnosed as having a personality disorder all through my teens, 20's and 30's - NOT GOOD


When I was finally diagnosed as Autistic,now an Aspie, life never got any easier, I just in myself finally realised I had a disorder, not of my own making, that explained a lot of why I am as I am

I struggle a lot as usual, having a diagnoses hasn't changed me one jot, nor do I claim any benefits. The only positive thing about being diagnosed is I can talk to myself in a more sane way

Im still as totally wired weirdly but even with a diagnoses I don't rush out and say "here Im an aspie, Im disabled, treat me different" but what I can do is accept my way of thinking and behaving isn't the same as everyone else but my way isn't wrong


My gran was Down syndrome. We never knew she was , she was gran. I doubt she was ever "diagnosed", weren't until she died and it was on her death certificate that we even realised. Now looking at photos its obvious to a blind man she was Downs Syndrome. But she was never diagnosed, and she lived a full and happy life, had tw children and a hand in our ( grandchildren) upbringing

A diagnoses doesnt make a life any better or easier

iammumtoone

Interesting thread. My son is currently going through the long stages of an ASD diagnosis, I am still undecided if I will carry on to the end or stop it.

I am unsure if it will actually help or make any difference.

He is intelligent but different, he knows he is different and hates it, he just wants to be like everyone else in his class he has a diagnoses of ADHD and absolutely hates it, he doesn't want to be labeled and have it confirmed that he is 'different' I think he would just rather forget and pretended he is like the others but he is not and struggles to fit in.

I'm not sure if I can put him through the ordeal of yet another 'label' but without it the the school may not reconise that he needs additional help in some areas meaning he will struggle more which will lead to him feel even more different.

cannyshopper_2

iammumtoone wrote: »

Interesting thread. My son is currently going through the long stages of an ASD diagnosis, I am still undecided if I will carry on to the end or stop it.

I am unsure if it will actually help or make any difference.

He is intelligent but different, he knows he is different and hates it, he just wants to be like everyone else in his class he has a diagnoses of ADHD and absolutely hates it, he doesn't want to be labeled and have it confirmed that he is 'different' I think he would just rather forget and pretended he is like the others but he is not and struggles to fit in.

I'm not sure if I can put him through the ordeal of yet another 'label' but without it the the school may not reconise that he needs additional help in some areas meaning he will struggle more which will lead to him feel even more different.

I'd go through with it, if only to help explain things. Your son may find it's a lot more common than he realises, and it could help him to talk to others his own age who will understand him.

As a teenager I always knew I was different (even though I hadn't any formal labels) and this was a constant source of unhappiness and conflicting feelings. On the one hand, being told that everyone is unique, and on the other being expected to conform. Throw raging hormones into the mix and it's a recipe for disaster.

Cynical teenage me (who never struggled with academic learning) thought that everyone was good at SOMETHING and your best way forward was to concentrate on that. It was only after several failed interviews for jobs I know I could have done blindfold that I began to realise sometimes you DO need a little help (eg if the interviewers could have overlooked my autistic traits and taken a chance, or I could have been coached in how to minimise the negative effects.)

I did see an advert some time ago specifically asking for people on the autistic spectrum to train as software engineers. Good on them for realising that certain careers suit certain personality traits. [I prefer to think of my ASD in that way rather than as a disability, despite what I said in my earlier post] I did spend a while in the computer industry, but it was the office politics that eventually drove me out. Perhaps in an organisation that understands ASD that might not have been a problem. But I'll never know now.