Adult Autism Diagnosis?

AylesburyDuck

Stoke wrote: »

This might sound odd, but do you actually want to know? I've always known there's something a bit odd about me. I wasn't like other kids at school and even now, there are things which confuse my friends and family and probably confuse me too..... yet it's seemingly impossible for me to change my wiring to act differently. Doing so requires far more willpower than is seemingly required by others. I also recently found out that my mum was told just after I was born by nurses that "there's something different about him" or something along those lines.

I've just decided I'd rather not know. It's not going to make me happier, it's just going to confirm that I'm different.... something I'm already aware of.

I originally thought the same, but then i changed my mind as when i get older i dont want people treating me as potentially "difficult" when thats not the case its because i process things differently and have some sensory problems/overloads.
Also as part of my Autism and sensory problems i have a feakishly high pain threshold,as a note, people who have ASD can possibly swing either way, high/low pain threshold which i need in my records as potentially someone could misdiagnose me/kill me for lack of normal pain response.

AubreyMac

Fireflyaway wrote: »

Don't read fiction books or watch drama or soaps on tv. The fact it's made up annoys me.

I did not know this was indicative of ASD.


It's been suggested I could have aspergers, I related to all your list apart from the fiction because I don't read books at all or watch dram/soaps but I do watch films and do enjoy fiction as long as its realistic - no sci-fi or silly superpower/superhero stuff.


I put my lack of social enjoyment down to being introverted. I actually get anxious when I have to use a manned checkout at supermarkets and getting my haircut is such a chore.
I live in a flat but will listen before I open my door, If I hear a neighbour opening their door to leave I will wait for them to go first even if it results in me missing my train and being late.


People (even professionals) mainly think I could have aspergers because I've been described as having 'emotional blind spots'. I often don't have sympathy for people when most do. I can only be honest about it, I can't pretend to care or feel sorry for someone when I don't. It's not that I don't have feelings, of course I do. This has caused issues in relationships before because for me it's easy to not go to someone's special event (wedding, visiting new born, big birthday) and not care about letting the guest of honour down - Really my not being there is not personal and I just think they are being too sensitive.


When I had bereavement counselling years ago, the counsellor there suggested I could have Alexithymia which is something I've never heard of before. I did an online test and it said I was on the very cusp.


Ultimately, I believe I just think and act logically/simply and it's mostly others who love to psycho analyse too much and get disheartened too easily.

marliepanda

AylesburyDuck wrote: »

Thanks elsien, it's also very invalidating, it would be like people saying there are a mildly pregnant, which obviously is rubbish because your either pregnant or not, same with Autism, your Autistic or your not.

A lot of the problem is with parents and others not wanting to see their child as being 'disabled' Autistic is a bad word, a bad thing to have, whereas aspergers? Oh thats fine, theyre an 'aspie' theyre a savant, its a positive thing theyre really focussed and into their interests etc etc.

When I was teaching we had an ASD base and some parents of children with aspergers diagnosis would refuse to see anything but that, and didnt want to have their children in with 'the ASD children' or 'low functioning' ASD, despite their children very often being very low functioning in many ways, whilst high functioning in their specific area of interest.

Anyway, long story short, the inclusion of it in the ASD spectrum is a positive move for the children and those wishing to cater to their needs wholly. Those who wish to hang on to the Aspergers diagnosis seems to be because of people 'not wanting to be/their child to be autistic' The sooner autism is not seen as a scary thing the better. It is hugely wide ranging but its impossible to categorise people off into sections of ASD.

fibonarchie

boliston wrote: »

it could just be introversion - lots of people prefer doing activities on their own rather than with other people - totally agree with not watching stuff like soaps on tv, just seems so pointless and a waste of time

Could also be a personality disorder. OP might not get the diagnosis he/she would like, and seems to think is the correct one.

dreaming

My adult child (39 yrs old) was diagnosed last year with Aspergers, after a few difficult years. She went to see the psychologist and I was asked to go along and discuss various things from her childhood, and the diagnosis was made. DD has a very good awareness of her condition and has been able explain that although she always felt "different" to others growing up, she learned various techniques to mask it. I certainly had never suspected although I knew how shy and reserved she could be - although I can be like that too - so never considered it as anything other than a "quirk". I did say to the psychologist that many of the traits associated with autism/aspergers might be applied to me (as I am also quite reserved/like my own company/often have different thought trains to others/dislike excessive noise etc.) but he explained that it is not simple. These traits can be seen as indicators, but they can also be "learned" behaviour due to life experiences. It is actually quite a complex diagnosis (he explained) and there can be other mental health problems which can present in similar ways so a professional diagnosis is the only way to be sure.
Although I am glad to have the official diagnosis as it has helped other people (mainly family members) to understand DD's behaviour, and I am learning to be more direct (less ambiguous) in speaking to her, in effect it has made little difference to DD. As she explained - she has always known how she was "in her head", she just covered it up to try to fit in (the pressure of which finally caused her breakdown). She has always read fiction, and enjoyed films etc., but has explained that she does not engage emotionally with them in the way that she knows I would. She literally reads the book (and enjoys it while she is reading it) then remembers the "facts" of the story but has no memories of the characters or the interplay between them, or even of her own enjoyment. She literally lives "in the moment", and although she herself can be emotional (usually when she is confused/out of her routine) she cannot read other people's faces for emotions etc.
I know how difficult it can be to get a diagnosis as an adult (she waited 3 years for hers). In our area there is no help available, and little understanding of the condition - when sorting out council accommodation recently, the council bombarded her with phone calls and requesting meetings despite being asked to put things in writing/e-mail as she does not easily process verbal instructions. I would say that as you are so concerned please visit your doctor (or access mental health services - MIND are very good) and see if there is help available, but also don't worry too much. We are all different and I know many people (myself included) who have certain traits that could be considered to be "on the spectrum" at certain times. Also be aware that being diagnosed could be a double-edged sword as it may make people treat you differently (could be a good or a bad things). Whatever happens I would also suggest some form of counselling so that you can explore your worries of being different. Sometimes just saying things out loud can help rather than having the worries going round and round in your head and getting magnified.
I wish you all the best.

fishybusiness

Perhaps worth some thought - what is it you would like from a diagnosis?

Plenty has been said already about lack of support, I have to agree, my partner was diagnosed in her late 20's and once she had it, that was it - off you go with this big report, have a nice life kind of thing.

After the uplifting experience of everything falling in to place, she came back to earth with a bump.

Things have settled down and her diagnosis has been a gateway to support from the local authority in providing help with going shopping, socialising, helping with planning and other things many people take for granted.

Also, it has lightened the burden on me, and has allowed me focus more on our business potential and support my partner at work.

Is it worth still pursuing or could my GP refer me? Any advice or opinions?

Yes, most certainly, just don't expect everything to fall in to place at once.

Bonniepurple

I am awaiting diagnosis- currently self diagnosed. For me, it’s about validation- the reason why I struggled (and still struggle) with certain situations, the reason why I can’t ask for help or say I’m not coping. I’m 37. My niece is 12, and she was diagnosed as a toddler. The support that she has and continues to receive should mean she will find education much easier than I did - and knows why she finds things hard.

Fireflyaway

Thank you very much everyone for sharing your experiences. I think a diagnosis would just put my mind at rest. It would explain why I've always felt different and it would reassure my mum that I have a condition rather than I'm just awkward or weird. Not that she probably thinks of me in those terms! If I was told I'm not Autistic I'd accept it too but at least I'd know.
As far as relationships with my daughter and husband goes it's fine. They accept that whilst they might be rolling around with laughter i fail to see the funny side. They know I will moan endlessly about things that seem insignificant to them but are a big deal to me. I try to limit this but it's hard.
With previous colleagues though I've never really got on well. I've been told I keep repeating myself and I really struggle to maintain eye contact. I never get invited to social occasions ( I wouldn't go if I did) and I'm the one sat in silence whilst they do the banter stuff. I've always found work stressful. I definitely identify with the masking thing. Until 2 years back i never asked colleagues if they had a good weekend etc. Then I thought I should try it as that's what people do! The school run was stressful. Fortunately I don't do it now my daughter goes by bus. Even as a child I felt the odd one out.

elsien

I think there's more recognition now that autism has been underdiagnosed in girls/women. Girls have the same difficulties but it may present differently, or they may be more socialised with learned behaviour in order to fit in better which can make the trigger for diagnosis less obvious.
There was a documentary a while back, but I can't remember what it was called.

fishybusiness

i never asked colleagues if they had a good weekend etc.

My children are also on the spectrum, this resonates with me - they never ask how are you dad, or anything remotely linked to me, it is just about them, their interests and outlook.

It did take a bit of getting used to, it is just fine now and still puts a smile on my face.

Best of luck with your GP.