Is my partner crazy...or am I?

thermal2844

Personally I think buying a house is a good idea, but not together, because you have irreconsilable differences. It's better to cut your losses now, painful as it will be, than to get further entangled. I just can't see how it could possibly work for you two. This isn't an area that you can compromise on - either you accept the cats as part of the package, or you don't. It isn't fair on either of you otherwise. One of you will just end up resenting the other.

LowKeyIceTea

getmore4less wrote: »

Even if she agrees they will be back in the house within a month.

it will start with something like just for an hour they want to play....

Come the winter it will be too cold outside and that's it.

If you don't want pets make that clear now.



That will stop as soon as you buy somewhere that is not yours exclusively they will be moving in with you

Why the "we pay" her cats her problem

I like the cats, i love animals, but they're long haired cats and the mess they make is incredible. If we do end up moving in, I know the cats will likely have to come with us - it's not the end of the world for me. I think its just worth investing in a Roomba ;D

RubyHouse

LowKeyIceTea wrote: »

Genuinely no idea what to do about the cats. Maybe one of those outside cat home things?

Wow, you need to relax.
What about if you have children, would they go outside too? What if your gf takes up a hobby that makes a bit of mess, will she have to that outside? What if you have a house warming party, will everyone have to stay outside?
Whats a bit of cat hair in exchange for a happy relationship, you can always just pick up the vacuum more often.


Personally, Im a dog person and like things tidy. Theres regularly torn up toys scattered across the house but its really not a big deal.

westernpromise

LowKeyIceTea wrote: »

No she goes back everyday for them to feed/water/change litter trays. Plus we pay for a cat sitter to come in daily to look after them (Family friend).

Surreal.
The cats will always be more important than you.

Silvertabby

LowKeyIceTea wrote: »

I like the cats, i love animals, but they're long haired cats and the mess they make is incredible. If we do end up moving in, I know the cats will likely have to come with us - it's not the end of the world for me. I think its just worth investing in a Roomba ;D

That's because they are being neglected. Long hairs need brushing at least once a day, otherwise their fur becomes tangled and they shed for England.

Smodlet

I completely disagree with moving the cats to your flat, OP. Cats are extremely territorial and, unless you live across a corridor from her (there's an idea; could one of you move to an adjacent flat?) it would cause them immense stress for no reason at all. Taking them to the vet's is bad enough.

If your gf has anything about her at all, she needs to either re-home her fluffies or take responsibility for them and brush them at least once a day. Once because they need it and more if they enjoy it (our shorthair's very favourite thing was being brushed. It was the highlight of his day) Otherwise I can see her having you re-homed down the line.

Red-Squirrel_2

westernpromise wrote: »

Surreal.
The cats will always be more important than you.

She made a commitment to the cats knowing how long they live. They are entirely dependent on her for every aspect of their wellbeing. They should be a priority, they aren’t toys or disposable.