Charging Rent from children?

scd3scd4

silvercar wrote: »

Why should they charge, if they have sufficient means that they don't need to take money off their children?

I fail to understand why you would take money off your children unless you needed to. I understand that some people need their earning children to pay for the extra it is costing them to live in their parent's home, but if you don't need the money, why would you take off your children.

If you don't understand after all the posts in this thread then nothing I can say will help but I will try

My daughter can earn before tax over £250 on an over -time shift. She wants mum to cook this cook that. Have her washing done...........mum use to iron it as well. Pick this personal item up or that item. Why should she not contribute. I fail to understand why you think they don't have too.

It's about respect and growing up. When she moved in with her boyfriend he wanted twice as much and her half of food and bills.

You still fail to understand????...............that's fine. It's nothing to me what a stranger thinks but the wife and I won't be changing.

Tabbytabitha

svain wrote: »

First of all ... you dont have to justify anything ... it is your house and so you are allowed to set the rules .... The fact they may be argumentative over it would just strenghten my resolve on the issue.

Secondly i would be asking your daughter and her girlfriend to leave .... im assuming they have a joint income and therefore will be able to afford to rent their own place.

Thirdly i would be asking your son for on par a single room to rent in your area ... (£350-£400 in my area) and he then covers own food, washing etc. Charging a percentage of income is outdated, petty and just smacks of jealousy or greed.


This is a different situation to most circumstances when this question is asked, as normally the kids have just got their first job and younger .... In these cases i wouldn't charge any rent for an agreeable term (2-3 years) allowing them to enjoy a bit of life before they get weighed down with responsibilities. Your two are both well into adulthood and i agree should be contributing if they wish to stay with you, or very strongly encouraged tp leave.

silvercar wrote: »

Why should they charge, if they have sufficient means that they don't need to take money off their children?

I fail to understand why you would take money off your children unless you needed to. I understand that some people need their earning children to pay for the extra it is costing them to live in their parent's home, but if you don't need the money, why would you take off your children.

And I fail to understand parents who seem so pleased to have produced children who are happy not to pay their own way - it isn't something I'd want to boast about quite frankly.

scd3scd4

silvercar wrote: »

Why should they charge, if they have sufficient means that they don't need to take money off their children?

I fail to understand why you would take money off your children unless you needed to. I understand that some people need their earning children to pay for the extra it is costing them to live in their parent's home, but if you don't need the money, why would you take off your children.

Why should the mum pay for friend. Let the daughter pay for her friend!

Poor_Single_lady

scd3scd4 wrote: »

There is no pressure in a parent asking a child how their day was or what they have been up to...........that's just want loving, happy families do......cheers ;-]

Lol. No. I meant your previous post (obviously) about what a great job you did as a parent and how great she turned out. That is pressure!!
My parents taught me that people are human and everybody - including them makes mistakes. Nobody is perfect. It's your choice if you want to put your daughter on a pedestal but don't be suprised if you're not getting the true picture.

LilElvis

Tabbytabitha wrote: »

And I fail to understand parents who seem so pleased to have produced children who are happy not to pay their own way - it isn't something I'd want to boast about quite frankly.

Yes, my parents should be really ashamed that they had an agreement that their daughters could live in their home without contributing as long as we were saving for a deposit. It must be so humiliating to see how their actions have blighted our lives. I'm sure they're really disappointed that we now live in large houses - mine effectively mortgage free since I was 43, sister will achieve the same in her early fifties. We've now both been independent for half our lives and have used that helping hand from our parents, along with their invaluable advice, as a stepping stone to financial security. Actually, I know the parents are proud of us and what we have achieved.

scd3scd4

Poor_Single_lady wrote: »

Lol. No. I meant your previous post (obviously) about what a great job you did as a parent and how great she turned out. That is pressure!!
My parents taught me that people are human and everybody - including them makes mistakes. Nobody is perfect. It's your choice if you want to put your daughter on a pedestal but don't be suprised if you're not getting the true picture.

lol.............jealousy is an ugly thing.

I am not sorry my family life offends you but we won't be changing anytime soon. ;-]

svain

Tabbytabitha wrote: »

And I fail to understand parents who seem so pleased to have produced children who are happy not to pay their own way - it isn't something I'd want to boast about quite frankly.

.... and i fail to understand parents who seem bereft of any financial compassion to their kids ... preferring to milk them as soon as possible and dressing it up as a life lesson

silvercar

Tabbytabitha wrote: »

And I fail to understand parents who seem so pleased to have produced children who are happy not to pay their own way - it isn't something I'd want to boast about quite frankly.

It's not a boast, it's a statement.

We chose the house we live in. The kids went off to university and when they came home, they had the option of returning to their same rooms that they had left behind. Charging them to do that didn't figure. All the choices of where we live and the cost associated with our house are ours. We are going to run this house whether they are there or not. (Though I do understand people who need to charge the extra it costs to have them at home).

Pollycat

I wonder if the OP will be back to comment on the opinions posted or to update us on how the discussions/arguments went.

It seems it has been an issue for a while:

smsfad wrote: »

I have requested my 2 children 22 & 25 years old pay £100 per month each for rent and one has refused saying that her 15,000 income is not enough to afford this much in rent, She has all her food bought and also for her girlfriend at weekends, all the laundry and she bathes every night and puts the heating on every day. Am I being unreasonable?
Thank you

This ^^^^ was back in October 2017.

Maybe the OP should have done something about the daughter's girlfriend at that time.

bertiewhite

smsfad wrote: »

how can I justify this as they are rather argumentative?

Invite them to "argue" a cheaper rent elsewhere?