OS Daily Thread, Friday 26th October

dorry_2

luxor4t wrote: »

Morning All,
Late today as I seem to be reacting to the pain killers (typical!).

OM will be back very late tonight after a few days with MiL in Scotland. He was seeing his brother last night, but | doubt he would have had chance to talk to him about MiL: I'm still not sure if he actually thinks her health is a worry. I know she is his mother, but she is 75, lives alone, behaves oddly and I can't see any of those facts improving.

MiL has been alone for 25 years now and always was very opinionated. Now she seems to have her own rules - when she was staying with us in the summer she would stare at people and comment loudly about their clothes or behaviour etc, then wonder why they reacted. She is also forgetful and can be quite rude - pushing past people, or impatient. She is critical of the neighbours (converted house) and watches them constantly.
She used to talk a lot about moving into a smaller flat or sheltered housing, but has stopped over the last two years. I wondered if she needs to start making plans to move to somewhere more suitable - maybe on the flat, nearer the shops and with less work needed etc etc.

If OM and BiL think she is OK, then there isn't much that will change their minds.BiL lives close so he will have to hold the fort if anything bad happens.

Oh dear, a bit of a rant! Sorry!

hi lux,

I have been working quite a bit with people who have dementia, I am a Learning Disabilty Nurse and s/w on a community team. It does sound she is behaving very oddly:eek: I think your oh and bil will ignore it, as relatives often do, by doing this they don't have to face it or do anything about it.

My dad died last year, 74, he had dementia and really deterioated at the end, so I know what's it like.

All you can do is let them get on with it, normally in these circumstances, a crisis will occur and the authorities will then bring it to your oh and bil attention, then they will have to act!!

hth

patentgirl

Morning everyone

Havent been on here all week well I have but not had the chance to join in with everyone been really hectic at work with all the clever people who save their days to have holiday this week! unlike me who had used all my entitlement by Aug luckliey OH has been off for a few days and DD14 has had alot of things arranged with friends.
Scuzz good luck with the fund raising
Amie have a nice day out in Isle of Wight
SmokeyBabe love the pics especially those cats
Jcr16 hope your toothache improves
Mrsmcawber well done on your weight loss and hugs to your sister
Pen Pin hugs to you too
Olliebeak congraulations on little Caitlin what a nice name
Red Ruby you have had me dreaming of a bacon sandwich alll morning now
Mioilere sorry about your mil
Cant wait till 3 when my weekend will start not sure what plans I have yet it is just nice to be home
hugs to everyonexx

ellie2912

CHARLIESMUM, SCUZZ, DLB, SMOKYBABE, PENPEN, ESSEXGIRL, CLAIREFUN, CHEERFULLNESS4
MEHEFIN ,FREE444073, HARIBO~ hello and hugs to you all~ like it or not!

MRS MCAWBER~ haven’t got a clue about ideas for sis other than favourite mags or maybe a craft kit if she does crafting.
JCR16~ hugs hope the jaw gets better. Ive got an appt at the dentist at 12.20pm. so i may be like you after.:rolleyes:
HARDUPHESTER~ Delilah norah. Hmmm interesting combo there.
KYLE~HAPPY PAYDAY! Don’t spend it all at once on holiday pics!
MRSMIX~ hope your dog gets better soon.
AMIE and PLUMDUFF 55~ hope you enjoy your days out.
PENPIN~ hope you have a better night tonight.
MIOLIERE~ your poor DH must feel so useless being at home while this is all going on. And then getting word that she isn’t even being cared for properly must be heartbreaking for you all. Hugs and gentle thoughts to all of you. X
ANNIEBOOKLOVER~ your boss has more hols than the Queen!
CRAZYCHIK~ my OH had similar probs re work.he changed from being a sky engineer to a labourer and loves it! (i think he needs his head testing out in winter) hope your OH finds something.
PINK~ hugs to you hope you feel better soon.
REDRUBY and TAPLADY :hello: :hello:
well i have to go to the dentist at 12.20pm.not looking forward to it but hey ho if my teeth feel better its worth it.
Got woken up this morning by OH's sisters boyfriend. who was going with OH to have a go at the brother who is taking the p*ss out of his sister. confused? dont worry it would get worse if i explained why! LONG STORY! basically the family is in exactly the same position as in july when all hell broke loose. got a feeling its gonna break loose more now.:rolleyes: rant over now promise!
we have inherited another dog,only till tomorrow afternoon while our friends go to a wedding. So the 2 of them are playing at chasing the cats in the garden. :rolleyes:
made blackberry jam the other day and it is divine! (even if i do say so myself )
first ever attempt at it so i was a tad smug. OH helped by pouring the jam into jars,my back cant lift the pan. glad i waited till he got home to do it.;) well best go and brush my teeth.

will pop back in later if i survive!
ellie
not much planned for today,apart from the dentist.

luxor4t

dorry wrote: »

hi lux,

All you can do is let them get on with it, normally in these circumstances, a crisis will occur and the authorities will then bring it to your oh and bil attention, then they will have to act!!

hth

Thanks dorry!
I do feel helpless as she behaves differently (badly) when we are alone and is far more as she used to be when OM is around. Its one of the reasons I didn't go up with him this time. She is his mother and wants his attention, so they can spend quality time together. He has been away from home for almost 30 years, so gets frustrated by being stuck in a time warp.

MiL and I used to get on really well, but things have slipped over the last 10 years or so, to the point where she openly ignores me and only talks to OM or talks at the children. I get blamed for his lack of promotion, bad decisions etc etc - I wish I was that powerful!

I really apppreciate your good advice and shall try to see the big picture with MiL- and my own parents!

Pooky

Morning all

What a gorgeous baby Olli - made me very broody.

Gloomy here today but not to chilly, although I've just put the heating on as DD's and friends DS's are in the garden - I know they'll be chilly when they come in. Looking after friends DS's whilst she's at an appointment - they all get on very well so it's easy.

Ebay stuff finishing today - again I'm astounded - out of 18 items - 10 are selling for over £90!!!! One of them - a harry potter toy that I paid £12.99 for is currently up to £23.99 :eek: Some peopole just don't seem to realise they can still buy it new for around £15....more fool them!

Made a lovely veggi soup last night - got 2 portions for the freezer left so that will do DD's food flasks for one day next week. Need to go to Mr T's as I'm low on everything but that will have to wait until tomorrow.

Played with my new Dyson this morning - it's amazing how much it picks up - I do like dysons but not the price - managed to pick this one up on ebay - it's a shop demo model but hadn't even been assembled so it's just as new but was £174 compaired to £299 in comets! :eek:

Anyway - enough waffle from me - hope you all have a great weekend.

Ohhh and :wave: to all my new facebook contacts - I feel almost popular! :rotfl:

Hardup_Hester

Hi Ellie
Interesting is not how I would describe their choice of name, all I do is smile & say nothing & hope they'll change their minds, lol.

tired_mum

Afternoon all
back from Camber Sands had a terrible time at Pontins the room was fithy and the police were called every night to the club house swimming pool was closed half the time and you had to pay for everything else when we did get in to the pool all the lockers were gone so kids had to put there clothes on the side of the pool on chairs and Ds new trainers had been nicked must have been an adult as he is an 8.5:eek: Camber beach was lovely and had some nice walks but wouldnt reccomend to anyone with older kids
Welcome to baby Oli
Mrs Mix hope the dog feels better
Mrs Mcawber hugs to your sis
JCR hope the jaw feels better
mioliere hugs to all your family
Pen Pin hope you haver a more restful night
Smokey Babe hope OH is ok
jackie O hope you are ok
Csarina loving the story
Hester am off to catch up on the blog
Sorry to all those i have missed please feel free to take a hug

Crazychik

Good Afternoon

Thanks for advise Moiliere, I will see how or what comes out of recent events, before taking the next step! Our local counsillor is brill, so I know he'll do what he can to help! I no dlb will back me up, but as for others, well - there not in the mist of it all, so probably wont get involved.

Hester - thanks for the info ref labouring, he's still in-decisive of what he really wants to do! But will take on board ref wages! Thanks for that! I just think that with recent events with his ex and the csa, its crippling us now what he has to pay out! So he's looking for anything with slightly more pay and job rewarding! (arent we all!) lol

luxor - I totally understand where your coming from ref MIL, I had to see my Nanna deteriate the last 2yrs of her life with dementia. It was heart breaking. especially for the family, when we knew she wasn't safe to live on her own. We had to make the decision and put her in a residental nursing home! Its easier said than done, but let OH have his time with her. Be there for him, and if she goes off on one with you, you just have to agree or nod! Its hard not to compete or try and reason with them, as 2 minutes later, they would have forgotten. Like Dorry says, its only when a crisis will happen when the authorities will step in. BUt I guess in the mean time, it wouldnt hurt you to get some advise from the social services!

Kids have gone with their dad now, they'll be back at 8.30pm! He's taking them to Blackpool for the day on Sunday. And asked if I want to go with them! As much as I wouldnt mind going, Im not sure OH will appreciate it. But then again, me & the ex would probably spend the day having digs or falling out. So, Im staying put!

Got to fetch some items later from freecycle.

Should really attempt to go into town and pay the bills, but might leave it now until tomorrow, Im cold & tired.

anyway, must crack on and get more washing done
Bye for now
Love Emma xxx